Ch 1

I paced back and forth in my lab, trying to think of another ingenious plan. But no matter what I came up with, I turned it down in realization that I had used it already. Explosions? No, Gir had messed that one up already. Mind control? No, tried that several times already. Poisoning the humans? I shuddered, remembering the last time I tried. Definitely not.

Then, I realized I hadn't called the Tallests in a while. They were sure to want to know what was going on! The only problem was, what was I going to tell them? I couldn't tell them that I was all out of brilliant ideas. No good Invader lacked ideas for taking over their assigned planet. I quickly decided to tell them that everything was going well and that they did not need to worry.

I went to go contact the Tallests, only to find Gir watching his Angry Monkey show.

"Gir! Stop watching that horrible monkey show!" I demanded.

"But I loves the Angry Monkey show!" He pleaded. "I loves it good."

I sighed. Dealing with Gir was like dealing with a newborn smeet. "You can watch it on the outside television, Gir," I explained.

"Okay!" Gir replied happily, and ran off.

I quicky contacted the Tallests, who appeared on the screen eating donuts, their all-time favorite snack.

"Hello, my Tallests! I am calling to reassure you that everything is going well," I told them. "Right now, I'm planning to ummm…. DESTROY THE DIB! Yes! I will destroy him so he and his humongous head do not get in the way of my ingenious plan."

"He seems rather, um, smart for being only a year old," Tallest Purple said.

"Yes, well…." Suddenly, a brilliant idea, one that I had never used before, popped in my head. "I just got an idea. I'll call you later. Bye!" Then I quickly severed the connection.

I sighed. Today was the last day of 6th grade. After this was summer, and after that was the beginning of Middle Skool. Not that I was worried. In fact, all I could think of was continuing my studies on ghosts, catching up on the stories the Swollen Eyeball had to offer, and above all, trying to stop Zim from taking over Earth.

At that last thought, I turned my head sideways, eying the Irken carefully. He returned my gaze with what seemed like a strangely calculating look.

After several intense moments (which seemed like ages to me), the bell finally rang. Zim burst out of the classroom with inhuman speed, but of course no one noticed. I left, quickly heading home in excitement.

I had planned this day for weeks.

I went inside, where my sister, Gaz, was playing videogames. I didn't ask how she got home quickly because I knew she had taken the bus. I headed straight to my room and began to prepare to get into Zim's base. I wasn't entirely sure what I was going to do, but I knew it involved taking pictures and blowing stuff up.

I headed straight to Zim's base, thinking of what I was going to do. Once I got there, I managed to navigate past the lawn gnome lasers easily. Almost too easily, in fact. I opened the door, hoping I could continue on.

Sure enough, I was easily able to do so. Soon, I was inside the base. I looked around. The alien technology once again managed to amaze me.

The Swollen Eyeball has definitely got to see this, I thought, looking at a wicked piece of machinery. I reached for my camera.

Before I was able to get it out, I felt a sharp pain in my arm. Suddenly, I felt extremely drowsy. I dropped to the floor, hearing Zim's maniacal laugh before the world turned black.

"I've caught him, my Tallests," I announced proudly.

"And?" asked Tallest Red. "What are you going to do with him?"

I quickly explained my plan to them. Once I was done, the Tallests stared at me silently.

"Are you serious?" asked Red.

"Well, as you pointed out, he's rather intelligent for a smeet. The thing is, he's no use to us human. He'll still have a reason to defend Earth."

"And what are you going to do after that?"

"Possibly despose of him. Or give him credit as my assistant. Anyway, I got to go start on my plan." Then I cut the connection.

I headed to the table where Dib was lying, asleep. I took out the tiny needle that contained the majority of my plan within it. I carefully injected it into the human, then turned to the computer.

"Begin the preparations," I told it. Then I sat and watched the transformation begin.