Chapter 1: The Confession
"Got it." Annie whispered. She looked up at Auggie, the man she had let get away. She couldn't let him get away again, she had decided. "Auggie, can we maybe talk a minute?"
"Sure, Walker. What's on your mind?" he said.
"Here, let's sit." She instinctively held her arm out to him for him to grasp so she could lead him to the couch. Once seated, she sighed and began the hardest conversation of her life. "Auggie, what happened, to us, I mean? Why have we drifted apart like we have? Was it just because we were together and now we're not? Was it my disappearing for 4 months and not contacting you? What was it?"
Auggie reached out and found her arm. He trailed his hand up to her shoulder and lightly grasped it.
"Annie, I... I think it was just a lot of things. An 'all of the above' if you will. Plus some. Look, we tried dating at the absolute wrong time, I think. I mean I hadn't really got over Parker yet, you were still healing from Lena and Simon, then the whole Henry thing happened and you went dark and disappeared on me. Then when you did come back you just expected us to be all good but you lied to me from the get go. You were supposed to trust me above anyone else, even after everything and you just didn't. I love you, I think I always will, but you don't want the same things I do, therefore I have to move on. It's too painful for me to be there around you everyday knowing you don't feel the same way. That you don't want the same things. I care about Tash and I think we can try to make it work but only if I'm not there, with you."
Annie reached up and grabbed the hand he had placed on her shoulder. She squeezed it and held it up to her cheek. It had always felt right to have him touching her, she had just not wanted to admit it to herself. But she had to grow up and learn to fight for the things that would make her happy, not just the people she cared about.
"Auggie, what if I told you I do feel that way? That I do love you. I always have from the moment you led me through Langley with your blind jokes, to the moment you gave me your car to chase after Parker, to the moment you told me you needed to talk to me 'face to face', to the moment you showed up at my house and kissed me, to the moment you told me you loved me right before I 'died', to right now, here, sitting next to you, holding your hand. I lost myself there for awhile. I lost my way, my perspective. But I've found it. Auggie, the only things I want are to be a field agent for the C.I.A. and to have you in my life, holding me, kissing me, telling me you love me, have your voice in my ear when I'm 5,000 miles away in some dire situation only you can get me out of. I can't go back there without you, Auggie. I'm willing to only be friends if that's what you want but I just can't stand the thought of losing you completely like I almost did in Grozny. I just can't!" Tears started to stream down her face and onto his hand that was still on her face.
Auggie reached up with his other hand to cup her other cheek. He softly wiped at her tears. "Oh, Annie. Do you know how long I've wished for you to say these things? You have the worst timing in the world, you know. I've already turned in my resignation and Tash is back at my apartment expecting us to travel the world together."
"Don't do it, Auggie. Joan would love to have you in her task force and Tash, I know you guys had a good thing but that was a long time ago. Do you really think she will adjust to you being blind? Will you be able to let her get away with breaking the law every five minutes and possibly being on the run yourself because of her?"
He sighed. He knew she was right, even if he hadn't wanted to admit to himself. But Walker had always been able to call him on his bullshit. He pulled her face to his and rested his forehead against hers, the way they had done a thousand times. "No, I suppose not. But, Annie, I don't know about us, as a couple I mean. When you went off the rails it really killed me. And there is Tash to deal with. And McQuaid. We'd have to just see if we can even build ourselves back to where we were before we can take that leap."
Annie reached up and held his face in her hands. She breathed slowly, in and out. "I'm willing to work on it if you are."
"For you, Walker, anything." He smiled that coy smile that always made her heart melt.