Here's a one-shot that was inspired by Freddie's (AWESOME) Spanish outbursts. (; Told by Sam! It's...just fluffy. So hold nothing against me if it's slightly cheesy! I tried my best to keep them in character, so I hope I succeeded with that as well! There is a bit of Spanish dialogue in there.. So I hope I didn't butcher that too badly! Translation is at the bottom. (P.S. The Spanish has been fixed! All thanks to Lalelis! Thanks a bunch!)

Enjoy!

¡Ay Corumba!

FanFic by: KeyLimePie14

Okay, I'll admit… Sometimes Freddie can be rather amusing. When he ruthlessly declares his love for Carly? Yeah, I die laughing on the inside, every time. Heck, sometimes even on the outside. But another, kind of subtle reason I find myself laughing at the nub is his tendency to shout out random Spanish phrases.

Like, just a minute ago I mentioned buying some more ham and what does he do? He shouts 'jamón'. Seriously? What does that even mean? I don't know… But I found it funny. Gah! What is wrong with me? After that, he just turned back to his computer…

"Yo Fredward?"

"Yeah, Sam?"

"What does, 'gamon' mean?" Freddie chuckled. Why is he laughing at me?

"It's 'jamón, Sam. Pronounced with an 'h'. It means ham in Spanish."

"Oh, I see. Frednub?"

"Yeah, Sam?"

"Spaniards have a strange language." He laughed again. What is so funny? I was dead serious! I took Spanish last year and man, what is up with their alphabet? Whatever.

"…Didn't you take Spanish last year?"

"Yeah…and I repeat, 'Spaniards have a strange language'." He smirked and rolled his eyes.

"So, ¿Me puede decir lo que estoy diciendo?" I just give him a look that should read, 'are you kidding me?' Doesn't he understand that, yes, I took Spanish, but no, that doesn't mean I can comprehend what he's spitting out at me? Oy, this boy needs to learn a little something about me…

"Do you think I can really understand any of that? Spanish was the one class I could catch up on my sleep last year and not be sent to the principal's office for doing so, dork." He smirks and nods, as if he has some sort of plan up there in that head of his. "What's that look for, nub?" He just shakes his head and looks back to his computer, typing some more. I lean over his shoulder and see that he's doing Spanish online. Oh yeah… he did briefly mention he's taking a Spanish course online this semester. No wonder he's always spouting off Spanish.

"How did going to the principal's office stop you from sleeping in any other class?"

"…Well, it didn't." I reply cheekily. He chuckles and shakes his head, his fingers going faster than a hamster on a treadmill at this point. So me, being the naturally curious person that I am, lean over just a little more to watch what he's doing. I'm so close that my breath accidently falls over his neck. He jumps and turns to look at me.

"Sam, what in the heck are you doing?" I smirk; this boy is getting red around the collar.

"Why? Does it bother you, Fredward?" He sighs and turns back to the computer. I sit there a few seconds staring at his now shaky fingers hovering over the keyboard. I point to the screen, to some random Spanish phrase, and ask, "What does that mean?"

"Huh? …Oh. That?" He points to the same thing with his cursor.

"Yes, that." I peck a little harder on his screen, making him growl under his breath.

"Sam, don't put a hole in my screen, would you please? And that phrase means, 'I am sixteen years old'."

"Ooh…I knew that looked familiar." He smirked up at me, rolling his eyes.

"Right, Sam."

"Hey! I learned something, Frednub!" I flicked him in the back of the head and his head fell forward, slamming against the screen. See? He can be funny. I laughed out loud. He groaned and glared at me, holding his forehead.

"Ouch. Sam," He glared, "why must you cause me bodily harm?" I snickered.

"Because it's funny, nub." He sighed, grumbling under his breath. "What does that mean?" I pointed to another sentence.

"I like Chinese food."

"Chinese food sounds good right now." He chuckled again.

"Figured you'd say that."

We both fell silent for a while, but then I started getting bored. Man, how can he just sit there and do homework?

"Hey, Freddums."

"What, Sam?"

"Tell me a story."

"…What?" He turned his head slightly, to look out of the corner of his eye at me. He arched his eyebrow in that way only he can. I nodded.

"In Español, por favor." I kicked my feet up on the coffee table and leaned back into the couch, staring at him expectantly. He typed out a few more words on his keyboard.

"Why Sam?" I shrugged, I didn't really know why I asked him that myself…

"Dunno. …Well, just say something in Spanish." Oy, that really earned me a funny look. He must think I'm insane. Really, I just love how the r's roll off of his tongue…and how it sounds so natural and what in the name of ham (jamón!) am I thinking? I'm just bored. Right. Just bored.

"Uhm…" He shot me another confused look and then, "Sam, mi corazon es tuyo. Eres tan bella y me gustas desde hace mucho tiempo. No puedo decirte lo feliz que me hace el saber que no me entiendes, porque probablemente me darías la golpiza de mi vida. Creo que lo que te estoy tratando de decir es que.. Te amo Sam." He said, all in one breath. He acted nervous. I don't know why though… What could he have possibly said to be nervous? It's not like I could understand it anyway. I just loved how it sounded.

"Now…" I started, staring at his face. "What does that mean?" His eyes grew large and he stammered a moment.

"Er…Well…"

"Yes?" I smirked, there was something he didn't want to tell me. He sighed.

"Some things are meant to be a secret, Sam." With that, he closed his laptop and trudged up the stairs to the iCarly Studio, leaving me all alone in the living room.

"Fine then! Just tell me what 'te amo' means!" I shouted after him, 'te amo' being the only thing I could remember. I heard something crash and then a meek voice shouted back.

"I love you!" ….I love you? What? …Oh. That's what it means. I narrowed my eyes and took the stairs two-by-two.

"You told me you loved me in a foreign language?!" I bellowed, stalking down the hallway, looking for him.

"Hey, Sam, let's not get hasty here…" I found him hiding underneath his tech cart.

"Oh, no…We're gonna get hasty…" I smirked devilishly down at him, cracking my knuckles for effect. He squeals like a baby piglet and throws his arms in front of his face for defense. As if that's going to protect him… He's seen the damage I can do. Let me tell you his puny little arms couldn't save anything.

I snicker at him. "You should know better by now, boy." And he should. Momma don't mess around with…affectionate feelings. Gross, it makes me sick just thinking it. And even though, yes, I love how it sounded rolling off of his tongue, no, I cannot let it slide without a beating. That would raise too many suspicions, now wouldn't it?

While I can't let the beating go, that doesn't mean I can't go a little easier on him…

But it's just because I like the way it sounded. That's all.

¿Me puede decir lo que estoy diciendo? - Can you tell me what I'm saying?

Sam, mi corazon es tuyo. Eres tan bella y me gustas desde hace mucho tiempo. No puedo decirte lo feliz que me hace el saber que no me entiendes, porque probablemente me darías la golpiza de mi vida. Creo que lo que te estoy tratando de decir es que.. Te amo Sam. - Sam, my heart is yours. You're so gorgeous and I've had a crush on you for the longest time. I can't tell you how happy I am that you can't understand this, because I'd probably be getting the beating of my life if you could. I guess what I'm trying to say is…I love you, Sam.

Oh, and for the record I do NOT believe Spanish is a strange language.. Nor do I think the people that speak it are weird. Just stating that. That was all Sam. *shrug* And we all know how unforgiving she can be.

Review? Tell me how bad my Spanish is! Go on! :D (I don't pay attention in Spanish class. haha.)