Disclaimer: I am not JKR. I do not own the Harry Potter franchise. I just adore the characters and like to play around with them.
This fic contains several passages directly from Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. I own the first edition American version of the hard cover book. I'm not going to go through and posting this disclaimer on every chapter, so this long one is meant to blanket the entire fic. I quote the book starting on page 299. Anything from there to the end is fair game. And since this fic takes place during the sixth book, I quote it a lot. I'm not trying to steel Jo's hard work, and if it really bothers you, I can pm you the pages that the quotes were on. Otherwise, if you're as big a fan as I am, you'll know which lines are mine and which are not. Okay, now that that's out of the way….
A/N: Okay, so, Half-Blood Prince came out, I was reading along, and I got to page 300. And, I'm sure like so many others, my thoughts from then on centered around one idea: what the hell was Ron thinking? Well, my dearies, after a couple reads, I went about trying to answer that. And I like to think that I got pretty close. This has been in the works for almost four years now, and I've kept coming back to it. In light of the movie coming out this month, I think it is finally time it sees the light of day. So, my children, I present to you my thoughts on what the hell Ronald was thinking.
"You added Felix Felicis to Ron's juice this morning, that's why he saved everything! See! I can save goals without help, Hermione!"
Ron stormed back to the castle, not even hearing what Hermione shouted back at him. She thought he was rubbish, absolute rubbish. Didn't think he could manage his homework, didn't think he could manage his prefect duties, and she obviously didn't think he could manage being a keeper. Well, perhaps she ought to take bloody McLaggen to Sluggie's party after all, wouldn't want her to be seen with someone she thought was rubbish. And maybe he'd take someone else...somewhere. There were loads of girls who didn't think he was rubbish, or at least didn't mind making eyes at him. Ron hadn't failed to notice that curly haired Hufflepuff fourth year who smiled at him each time he walked by, nor could he ignore the Ravenclaw from his sister's year who blushed when they passed in the halls.
Ron grumbled the password at the Fat Lady, deep in thought as he crawled through the portrait hole and into the common room. There was a party going on, but he was in a foul mood and wanted no part of it. He pushed past several people, trying to get to the boy's staircase.
"Hi, Ron," Lavender said dreamily to him as he passed.
Ron ignored her as he began to climb the stairs.
There were loads of girls who fancied him, loads that wanted to....
Ron stopped, his foot halfway lifted to climb the next step. Lavender fancied him, did she not? She seemed to, in any case. She came to try outs, and she was especially enthusiastic about the games, more so than usual.
Ron turned back around, not exactly sure of what he planned on doing. He found Lavender in a corner with Pavarti, looking crestfallen. Ron walked right up to her and pressed his lips to hers with so much force he knocked her into the wall.
Lavender squeaked into his mouth, but only took seconds to respond to his advances. She wrapped her fingers through Ron's hair and pressed her body more fully to his. Then she began to move her lips.
Oh Merlin, what have I done, Ron thought. Okay, move your lips, you daft fool!
Ron began opening and closing his mouth against Lavender's. He felt like a fish, but Lavender made an odd sort of purring noise that he took to be a good sign, so he kept it up.
Okay, think, Ron, think! What have your brother's told you about snogging? They talked about it enough bloody times, why didn't you ever pay attention?
Ron was so busy trying to concentrate on keeping his mouth opening and shutting, and trying to remember any tips his brothers might have given him in the past, that he shortly realized that he was opening and closing very close to Lavender's nose. Ron readjusted and went on with his thoughts.
Okay, Charlie once said that a bird liked it when he kneaded her back. That's worth a shot.
Ron started to knead his hands into Lavender's back. She immediately cried out in pain.
"Sorry," Ron mumbled against her mouth.
Okay, no kneading. What else? Didn't George mention something about using my tongue?
Ron stuck his tongue into Lavender's mouth, only to cause her to pull away.
"Not so much; you don't want to gag me," she said through a giggle.
"Sorry," Ron said again. He could feel his ears burn red.
"It's fine."
She closed her eyes and tilted back her head. Ron closed his as well and moved in.
Don't miss her mouth; please don't let me miss her mouth.
Ron caught the left corner of Lavender's mouth with his own, but quickly slid over.
Bill knows a lot about this sort of thing, he has to have mentioned something before.
Ron racked his brain, trying to remember something, anything that his eldest brother had told him about kissing.
That's it! Ron thought in triumph. Bill used to tell us that he'd drive the girls wild by nibbling their bottom lip!
Ron got hold of Lavender's bottom lip and began nibbling away.
"Ouch!" she cried, her hand flying to her mouth.
"I'm really sorry," Ron said awkwardly. Why hadn't he gone up to bed like he had intended?
"It's fine. Look, do you want to find somewhere more private?"
Ron didn't need to be asked twice. It wasn't everyday a bloke could botch up a snog as badly as Ron had, and have the girl ask him to go someplace where no one else could watch. Go where the snog could get, well, more like a snog should be.
Ron led the way out of the common room, walking into the first unlocked classroom he could find. Which happened to be where Hermione and Harry were.
Ron couldn't help the grin plastered to his face, partially based on the fact that he had just kissed one of the prettiest girls in Hogwarts, partially based on how depressed Hermione was looking. Ron was happy she looked so upset; let her feel how he felt every time she wrote a book to Krum while Ron was right next to her.
"Hi, Harry! Wondered where you'd got to!" Ron said it more to break the awkward silence than anything else.
"You shouldn't leave Lavender waiting outside," Hermione said as she walked towards him, the yellow birds circling her head making her look like an angel. "She'll wonder where you've gone."
Ron hadn't realized Lavender had left, but as he looked around, he noticed that she wasn't in the classroom.
Hermione continued to walk purposely toward the door and Ron breathed a sigh of relief. He had half expected, maybe even half hoped, that Hermione would do something rash, something more to show she was hurt than simply looking sullen. Ron got his wish, and promptly cursed himself.
As Hermione opened the door, she turned back to Ron and shrieked, "Oppugno!"
Ron threw his arms over his head against the onslaught of demented yellow birds now intent on attacking every inch of him they could reach.
"Gerremoffme!" Ron yelled, flailing against the birds as Harry tried to dispel them all.
Lavender ran in at the noise, and screamed when she saw that Ron was being attacked. Once Harry had gotten rid of the last bird and left, awkwardly giving some half mumbled excuse, Lavender began fussing over the hundreds of tiny scratches now covering Ron's arms and face.
"You poor dear," Lavender cooed. "Look at all of these. And how did you get these?"
Ron looked to see her tracing the scars left on him by the brains in the Department of Mysteries.
"Oh, those? Er...." Ron couldn't exactly tell Lavender how he had really gotten the scars on his arms. It wasn't common knowledge that he had been running through the Department of Mysteries with Harry and Hermione looking for Sirius Black, the convicted murderer. "I–er–got them when I was a kid. Fell off my broom and into some blackberry bushes. The thorns got me good in a couple of places."
It was a pathetic lie, and it never would have fooled Hermione. Lavender seemed to buy it, and began to place little kisses all over Ron's arms. The kisses on his arms soon moved to more snogging, which meant that Ron had to concentrate on not causing Lavender any more pain. But as Lavender pushed Ron into a chair, placing herself in his lap, and began focusing her attentions upon his neck and earlobe, Ron's mind was left to wander.
It wasn't that he wasn't enjoying what Lavender was doing, quite the contrary, as his overactive teenage libido would contest. Ron just couldn't help but wish that Lavender's hair was a bit less perfect, or that she would correct him in a cute, bossy-like way when he did something wrong. Or even that she would go into a long diatribe about how snogging originated, or what steps the Hogwarts founders took to ensure that it didn't take place in their school. But that wasn't Lavender. That was another girl, a girl who didn't think that Ron was good enough to play Quidditch without help, and who surely didn't think he was good enough to snog. No, she only did that with top of the line Quidditch players, which it was clear that, in her opinion, Ron was not.
So, reclaiming Lavender's mouth with his own, Ron swore to himself that he would no longer think about Miss. Perfect Prefect. But as Lavender taught him how to properly move his mouth, and told him that it was alright for him to put his hands in her hair, Ron couldn't help but wish that she was a little bit bossier and that her hair would frizz.
A/N: Okay, chickies, what do you think? Let me know. Reviews make me happy. And a happy Miki puts updates up faster than a sad Miki. So we all want happy Miki, don't we?