Haunted Eyes

I had hurt enough in my last years to last me a lifetime, and bringing home Taylor had only added to the pain I had already felt. She was the young untouchable force that killed me inside and reminded me of the love I had already lost.

Chapter One: Force

Jasper's POV.

I was desperate, I was desperate and alone with one outbreak that took all of everything in me to contain myself on a daily basis. I had once achieved self control, one that came with such strength all I could ever think of in complete desperation was having her in my arms again. To feel her cold breath on my neck and her small body pressed against my own.

She belonged to me and as much as we may have fought against our own needs and wants… there was no denying the fact that we were made to be with each other at the time. Darkness laced with pain, and beauty mixed with excitement in which no one could contain, no one… but me. We were black and white, good and bad, the fine line between love and hate.

But somewhere, something along the way went wrong. Maybe it was the fact I had almost killed her best friend. Bella had worked out with Edward… but something between us died that day. Something in me died and forever I would search for the release that failure had deprived me of.

My only outer look on life was seeing myself in the mirror and seeing who I am, and who I use to be. Seeing the malicious killing machine I am, and the quite and pained soul I used to be. It wasn't suppose to be like this, I was never suppose to turn into what I am today.

Walking through the halls of the ranch I begged Carlisle and Esme to buy when I lost my look on life. Hoping the idea of the horses and the country feel would carry me back to the man I use to be, the man I had been before she turned me into what I was.

There was no warning, to way to tell what Alice was leading up too. She was never lost in thought, she never hinted she wasn't interested anymore. She never seemed to resent anyone or anything… she acted like any other day. I was out hunting with Emmet, but when I returned home to see her, she was gone. No explanation, no letter. But it wasn't like Alice to just get up and leave, so within the week, an e-mail came. One that seemed to map out the rest of my dead life.

She told me she couldn't hold me back anymore, and that she had seen someone else. Someone that she was truly meant to be with. She claimed that the real reason we had clicked together was the simple reason of saving each other. I was loosing myself, and Alice was having trouble knowing what she was. We had aided and helped each other until there was no other explanation for the reasons we had leave move on. But she asked me to stay. She asked me to remain with the Cullen's for if I left, Esme and Carlisle would never forgive themselves. They blamed themselves for her leaving, and it was her choice.

Nothing seemed to make sense after she left. I never left my room other then the occasional hunting trip I took with one of the family members, and even then I seemed to have found myself distant and pained. Their emotions showed nothing but pity and remorse as they looked at me and saw the once tameable Jasper that reminded them of Alice.

And even if the letter said other wise, even if they still loved me as a son and a brother. I would always be the one that drove Alice away from them. I would always be the reason the house was a little more quite, the reason the day seemed that much longer and the nights that much more painful. Even hunting came as so much more of a struggle. Running until we found the animal that quenched our thirst.

Though I tried to hide it from Carlisle, I had slipped more since Alice left then I ever had before. When I was with Alice, I had tried so hard to be the vampire soul mate she needed, she deserved, she wanted. And now, there was no denying the fact that I would never be what I was. I would never amount to the person I could have been.

Taylor's POV.

I was suppose to be strong. Stronger then the ones that reminded me of home, stronger then the ones that threatened to make me weak, and stronger then the ones that forced me to stand down. Brave and courageous I should have been the one to stand along side the leaders in the world people of America will never know. I was suppose to be the one to rise above all else and conquer the fears that threatened to hold me back, the one to over look the bad and make myself survive till the end.

So why did now feel so… different. My mother and father had been killed, or so that is what the police claimed. But by someone or something other then themselves, I think not. It was a surprise they neglected to drag me down to the deepest depths of hell with them in a way. They despised everything they were, everything they stood for.

Shape shifters should have been the superior race, the supernatural beings to take everything from the humans that didn't understand their own power, and use it against them. Force them to forget and over come the destruction and the pain they had caused each other. We could change into anything of any shape or size human we chose. And in my parents' eyes, that was an abomination. If we couldn't be normal, then we couldn't be anything.

That was why I had left, that was why I had escaped while I still could. And yet, I couldn't live with the lack of discipline. Why the American Navy had been my answer out of this hell hole, I cease to understand… but that remains to be my only reason to neglect from returning home. But now, everything has changed. The house that had once proved as my safe haven has now gone from safe, to surreal. Nonetheless I find myself winding down the drive in my ranked uniform ready to meet the people that had chosen to join me on the day of their burial.

I had not seen or met any of the people that were gathered here today and I was unsure of the intensity of this event. My parents had never been social folk, maybe that was the difference between us, why we never seemed to click together.

I wonder if this is how it felt… to be forgotten. To be neglected. I had never been good at getting to know people, but by no means was I an outcast. I was a soldier. A savoir to the everyday people that neglect to show us the respect we fighters need to move on. I had overtaken obstacles that everyday people would only see in their dreams let alone nightmares, and yet it gave me goose bumps just thinking about taking those first steps towards the front door.

Bismarck stepped up beside me and walked forward and I ascended to the front of what use to be my old home. My history. We had lived in the house many years before I broke away. Though we do not age, that does not change us from taking over an older form. Right now, I was a twenty three year old blond haired girl with a US Navy uniform on, knocking on my own front door.

The man to answer the door was tall and blond haired. With pale white skin and a warm smile. He was handsome and breathtakingly beautiful, like natural scenery. He seemed to look as a generally all around pleasant person, and his very presence seemed to calm my never ending nerves. "Good afternoon sir, I'm Taylor Albemarle, Rose and Joshua's daughter." I smiled as the man looked from me to my dog and back up again. "This is Bismarck, don't worry, he shall not be of any concern." I reassured the man as the dog growled quietly.

Bismarck had been by my side since the day I had reached my first official ranking. I had received him as a gift for the first troop my age and a girl that had climbed so far and so fast. I had named him after one of the most famous warships in World War Two. She was the lead ship in her class and ran like a beauty. Just like my companion.

"That's a wonderful uniform you are wearing. I am Carlisle Cullen by the way. A friend of your fathers." the man smiled as I looked at him, trying to read if his intentions were harmless or if he were leading towards something else.

"I am Chief Petty Officer Albemarle of the U.S Carrier Enterprise. It's a pleasure to meet you sir." I tried to smile fully as he nodded his head in understanding.

"I have an adopted son once in the army. He's from down south." nodding my head, I didn't think there were even very many vessels or training facilities down that way. But I couldn't be sure.

Following the man into my house, I smiled as he turned to face me when we approached the back of the house and the French doors to the back yard. The smile was fake, as was the regret that I couldn't be here with my parents longer. I had grown up with them in every way. Some days it even feels as if I was more mature then they were, but we all have our reasons. The compassion and feelings I had once held towards my parents had slowly faded into nothing but resentment. Resentment over the fact that out of everything I could have offered, they chose to dwell on the gift I had nothing to do with in the end. Perhaps that was the reason I had left so young.

"I'm so very sorry to hear bout your parents Taylor, but I am surprised you do not remember me. Surely you would recognize me at least a little."

"I apologize sir, but I do not recognize nor do I remember your face." turning to look at the man, I couldn't help but stare straight into his eyes. Golden and liquid, like topaz paint. But looking deep into the eyes of this man, I could easily see myself falling and becoming weak and dependent in a moments' time the way he caught me off guard. And being dependent, means being helpless.

Silence filled the air, and not an understandable silence, or respectful such as we had learnt quickly in the Navy. "Excuse me sir." I stated strongly, holding my ground and refusing to be the first to break eye contact as I walked away. But though I attempted to walk away, weather it was a sign of disrespect or not, as I watched in slow motion he grabbed for my arm but not before I could dodge out of the way. "Sir." I warned warily. I wasn't in the mood to be hassled, not here… not now.

"Taylor, I'm Carlisle Cullen… your godfather." he looked at me just as warily as I starred at him in disbelief.

"I… I have to leave." I gulped heavily as I watched him take a step towards me. It had been years. Years since I had any contact with any extended family, and I was set on continuing the streak until I had more control, more self reliance, and more power. This was dangerous. Mother and father should have never been so foolish as too trust someone or get too close to anyone who was not one of us. Always changing meant over working our bodies in order to keep an appearance up for someone else. Their real forms were young and beautiful, with skin pale and eyes cold. Just like their hearts.

Taking a step towards the door, I couldn't dodge him last attempt to grab my arm in attempt to hold me back. The contact frightened me and as I took a stronger and more aware step back, Carlisle followed my step and starred at me once again. Leaning closer, my breath caught and as he leant closer to me ear, I closed my eyes and prayed my form would not change itself. "I know what you are… don't worry."

A sigh of relief pushed past my lips as I turned and left Carlisle standing frozen in place inside. The doors proved to grant me a double door entrance as I walked outside suddenly, I was greeted by a flash of bright light and as I walked down the back steps, I couldn't help but shudder as the people around me danced and celebrated.

American's would think this unusual, but we were in Nova Scotia now, and here… they followed Scottish as well as the Irish traditions and in the aftermath of a death like my parents', there was an unbelievably amount of life to celebrate. It was a party for the passing. A way of showing their respect in some sorts.

It was never like this. We were never so easy to kill. But changing makes us weak, thought the form for an outer appearance proves to make us the superior race. But my parents were late-twenty year old gods and thought they could have lived whichever lifestyle they could have chosen, the life of an insolent old couple seemed to suit them just fine.

They were old fashioned, they believed in arranged marriages and young and proper love. There was no denying I was their target, I was their life source. Their only reason for continuing onward in their lives, if that's the direction they claimed to travel.

"So is this your true form, or are you playing a role behind a mask?" Carlisle appeared beside me again as I approached the water that was attached to my parents' land.

"I hope sir that you shall never know my true form, nor my true self. I wish to take the life I have been given and experiment. I have nothing left. No family and no friends. The Navy is all I know other then Bismarck, and he enjoys the water as sure as I do." I refused to look him in the eye, the fear of loosing myself again surely was not a feeling I wished to endure more then once this stormy day.

"As my Goddaughter, the last request your father left with me was a note addressed to you. He hoped you would read it and carry out his last orders." Carlisle handed me a letter and walked off through the sand, leaving me alone with my thoughts and the open air.

The wind caught and flew around me like a tyrant of angry water that would normally flow beneath my boat, but there was no denying the simple fact that I was not on the water, but on the sand and at the very place I swore I would never return too. And nothing felt as if it were going right. Looking down, I opened the envelope with ease and little ripping and sighed as I unfolded the carded paper that smelt of my father's study.

Taylor,

Your mother and I know you're aware of the reasons we did what we did, but we also know you will not be surprised. We are proud of your accomplishments on the water with the Navy and we're glad you found Carlisle. He's a good man Carlisle Cullen is, a good man.

We know you will disagree at first but this is our last wish and as your father, creator, and mentor, I am hereby revoking my owning rights over your shifting abilities and allowing them to fall to the faithful hands of my friend Carlisle. You and I both know how old you really are and I continue to believe that you are not fit enough to survive on your own, not yet.

I know you will oppose and argue but you took a vow when I created you to honour my soul and this is my last wish. They're good people Taylor, and you will do them proud like the perfect daughter we raised you to be. And don't worry, Carlisle's got the papers and everything down in writing. It's just a matter of packing your things.

Good luck my daughter. And know that we are so proud of you… no matter where we are.

Signed,

Joshua Albemarle

Rose Albemarle

My whole world seemed to come crashing down around me as I looked from the note to the water to my faithful companion and back again. My life was being handed to people I hardly knew and to a family I may not be able to help but get close too, and the only problem with that… is when you get close. There's no keeping them alive after.

This was not how it was suppose to be. From the deepest depths of Hell, and the darkest clouds in the sky. From the look of an angel, and the strength of a brute, unbreakable force, I was the nightmare in every child's dream. The boogieman in every toddler's closet, and the storm on every sea. I was Taylor Albemarle, daughter of the outspoken, and monster of your nightmares.

Where I walked, terror followed and as I stand damned to hell, never have I ever read my prophecy to be filled with such complications. Immortality has never been taken lightly, and perhaps that was the reason Joseph and Rose had left me here. They had lived far longer then I and maybe their lives had taken a dull turn for the worst. There was only so much possible when you've built yourself up to learn the path of self reliance and anti social ways.

Living with endless options only kept you entertained for so long. When you've lived long enough for the choice to do anything and everything you've ever wanted. Perhaps the life dies within you. There has always been a reason our forefathers invented soul mates. Maybe I never understood it fully, but when the spark dies that you were meant to share with the person you love… there's no escaping the dull sense that follows you through life.

I would know. As long as I have roamed the world, not once have I ever found the special spark that would lead me to a life where I was meant to discover all things over again. And if I ever did find the one person I was meant to spend the rest of my life with… we would have many things to redo, many experiences to relive.

"If I would be so bold as to interrupt. Might I ask what's bothering you?" Carlisle's honey voice pulled me from my thinking. I could live with hundreds of others on a cramped boat, I could live with death and unfairness. But I could never live knowing I've been lied too.

"Surely Mr. Cullen you understand the situation I'm in. There is no not knowing the remains of the letter that sits in my hands now." I sighed as I looked from the crashing waves to his face and took off across the rolling waves of grass. "Mr. Cullen… I have lived with many things, but I will not tolerate being lied too. With all due respect sir, I will not stand for it." I stopped in my tracks as I looked at all the people gathered around the fire. I couldn't help but sigh as I turned to the fire and raised my hand over the piercing flames. Welcoming the painful release of recognizing an outer feeling on my numb skin. Opening my tight grasp of the letter, I watched as it floated down to the fire and burnt into the ashes that joined the bottom of the fire pit, just like my life had.

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"I do love me a good girl in uniform." Emmet smiled coyly.

"You don't scare me." her voice was brisk through the cold air.

"Then I second the nomination to send her home!" the booming voice irrupted through the silent air and struck everyone around them.

"I can be everything and anything you've ever wanted." the voice was velvet against a rough air. Like peanut butter on burnt toast.

"If you want to make anyone happy, you'll go and never come back."

You know the drill!

So, Next chapter or not?