Characters: Bruce, Tony
Rating: Teen
Prompt: fluff, kitsch


Rule Number Stark


Tony smoothly rolled the car up to the curb and parked it. There was plenty of street parking available and though there were pedestrians scattered up and down the road, there were no stress-inducing throngs of people waiting to get on Bruce's nerves.

Admittedly, the more time he spent with Tony Stark the more he had to alter his definition of stress.

"Earth to Big Guy, you still with us." Obnoxiously, Tony accentuated his words by snapping his fingers in Bruce's face.

"Hmm? Yes. Just wondering at the fact that you apparently know of a restaurant without valet service and throngs of adoring fans gathered out front." Bruce swung himself out of the car and stepped onto the sidewalk.

"I have hidden depths. And they include diners and lemon meringue pie."

"Good to hear."

Bruce followed Tony down the block past several storefronts until they reached the restaurant, very much a diner-style, community hangout sort of place. Plenty of booths complete with cracked vinyl seats, a flurry of activity in the half-open kitchen, and eclectic décor crowding the walls. The food scents were mouthwatering and a quick glance at the customers already seated and enjoying their late lunches was enough to confirm Bruce's desire for exactly the food he suspected he'd find here: fast, delicious, and generously portioned.

"Mr. Stark." The host was a dark-haired man in his mid-twenties with a sour expression on his face. Back so soon?"

"Wouldn't pass up an opportunity to enjoy your welcoming personality and sparkling wit, Richard. Or was it Riley? Roger?"

A passing waitress who Bruce estimated to be in her early-sixties stopped to pull Tony into a hug and plant a kiss on his cheek interrupted Tony's recitation of various R-names. Tony, interestingly, did not pitch a fit, much to Bruce's astonishment. He even offered the woman an awkward pat on the back, which was apparently the toll required to be released from her embrace.

"My favorite Tony. It's been too long. Regis! Put 'em in my section, I need to make sure Tony's taking care of himself."

Regis' response was more growl than assent, but he did grab two large menus and led them to a booth in the corner, not bothering to check to make sure they were following. He escaped back to the front before they had begun to seat themselves.

"Charming fellow. Great conversationalist." Tony pushed his menu aside.

About to respond, Bruce looked up and caught sight of a sign by Tony's head that caused him to pause.

**PLEASE: NO DANCING ON TABLES**

Turning to see what caught Bruce's interest, Tony grinned. "Yeah, this is my table. Practically has my name engraved on it.

"Tony…"

"Yup?"

"Anything you'd like to share with the class?"

"Well, to answer a few likely questions: Yes, I've been here several times before. Yes, the sign is there because of me." He smiled more widely and even punctuated his words with a small shimmy in the seat. "And I would recommend the burrito, your choice of fillings, they even have marinated tofu. This place is actually a hippie-yuppie retreat in disguise."

"Right." Said Bruce, glancing back over to Regis with newfound pity. "Fantastic."