Just Don't Forget
-~#~-
There are some mistakes that can never be taken back.
Angsty Ranma x Akane
-~#~-
Nekohanten was almost completely empty that day, it was the kind of slow day that had a feeling it was waiting for a bigger event to take place.
Ranma was eating his lunch that day when Shampoo told him she had something Ryoga sent to give to him.
Ranma disinterestedly accepted it. When he read the letter though, his eyes widened, heart beating a little faster.
He opened it, almost in a panicking speed trying to retain his calm. The letter opened wide before the card fell out.
He snatched it and read, eyes wide.
The little card in his hand seemed to burn in his fingers. The pristine colors glared back as if to mock him with its prominence.
Shampoo read the card over his shoulder.
"Oh, it happen already? Knew would. Much too obvious."
Ranma's teeth grinded, eyes flashing. It was happening already?
He felt a pang in his heart, and his eyes had a slight pricking that he furiously blinked away.
Shampoo smiled wide, "Ramen, airen? We celebrate!"
Ranma clenched his jaw tighter, his heart beating faster.
"Uh, Shampoo, I'm going to go out for a while." He said lowly, trying to speak calmly, his bangs covering his eyes.
The purple haired girl frowned deeply but Ranma had dashed out before she got anything out.
Ranma was shivering, despite the warm Japanese temperature. Hadn't she said she always wanted one like this? In the summer, outside, in the cherry blossom season? He remembered, he remembered a hell of a lot of things she said.
Sometimes, he wished he didn't remember so much.
He ran, his heart constricting and he struggled to breathe. Stop hurting! He thought irritably, speeding up as if to drown out his internal pain with physical pain.
He was gasping when he had realized he had already reached her- theirs? , no, that hurt too much to say- house.
He stood in front of it, shaking as though he was facing seppuku, his body quivering harder than the day he his mother had almost made him.
The fire in his eyes' had died, sorrow and regret shining as he stared into the old house of memories.
Ranma's steps were mechanical as he walked to the gate. His hand felt like lead as he struggled to rap it on the door, and it shuddered as it hung a few inches before the wooden gate.
He couldn't do it. He was too much of a coward, even now. His hand felt heavier as he dropped it, wondering what the hell he was doing there. Stomping back into her life, tromping over her happiness again.
But… he had to know. Was she really going to do this?
He steeled his already tension stiff muscles and took a deep breath.
His knuckles had barely grazed the door when he heard Nabiki and her father talking animatedly behind the door. He paused again, listening.
"I can't believe it!" Soun Tendo was crying, from the way he was blubbering, "My baby is all grown up!" He wailed, going through all the tissues in the box.
Nabiki scoffed, "Not yet, dad. Soon though."
His dad sniffled, "It's not too soon for her, is it?"
"You were the one who couldn't wait to marry her to Ranma a few years back, what happened?"
"But… but the day's actually comeeee!" He blubbered.
Nabiki sighed, trying to keep her patience with her crybaby father, "Dad, you're giving her away and that's that. Her happiness is important to all of us. Now come on, we're doing the final rehearsal in an hour."
Soun's whimpers gradually decreased, as their footsteps disappeared.
Ranma's body was leaning heavily on the door, his knees quivering underneath him.
One part of his mind belittled him for being so weak, unable to stand. But the majority of him couldn't believe it. Was he really too late?
He couldn't be. He had to stop this, this… this mistake. This couldn't happen.
Ranma's resolve steeled, his face twisted in determination, hands clenching.
In a few swift movements, he had landed on the roof of the house, looking out onto the city, scanning for her.
He was about to jump off the roof to search more in the city, when he heard her.
Akane was outside, practicing her martial arts on the practice dummy. She grunted as she threw various punches and kicks. Her gi was disheveled, and in the time he wasn't there, she had filled out even more, her curves prominent even in the formless gi.
Her hair and bangs had grew and her face was sharper and brighter, more mature.
Sweat glistened off her skin, but her flushed face remained concentrated and focused.
Ranma's heart flipped at the sight of her. She had grown so much since. Granted, he saw her at school all the time, but she avoided him like the plague.
He watched her for a couple more minutes, and noted she improved her marital arts and techniques too, the type of improvement impossible without a teacher.
God… she was beautiful, he realized sadly. He was the worst liar ever; how the heck did he ever get her to believe she had been uncute? Her chest, which wasn't even flat before, had grew too. And her face wasn't a guy's, she would never be able to dress up and pass as a guy anymore, it was too noticeably sweet and feminine.
He watched her sadly, he should've been there to see her defy all his previous insults about her. After all, she loved to prove him wrong.
A small smile, a weary and regretful, tired looking one, graced his face, his eyes aging years as he watched her.
All too soon, it ended when he heard him call her.
Ranma's body stiffened so rigid his muscles hurt, his jaw clenched.
"Akane! Do you need any help?" The voice rang out
Akane looked back, her chest rising and her breath fast. Her flushed face grinned as she saw who was coming.
"Ryoga! Yeah, I'd love some help," her warm voice rang out.
Ryoga ran up to her and watched as she smiled and continued her workout.
Ranma was on the edge of the roof now. His breathing had started intensifying, his knuckles white as he desperately clung to the roof for his sanity.
It was him, the source of this mess, of all his problems. Of these stupid feelings that was messed up inside him. Why did he have to come butting into his- their- life?
Ryoga had stepped in at some point, placing his hands at Akane's shoulder and elbow.
"A little higher, your stance should be more defensive," he said softly to her, his mouth dangerously close to her ear.
Ranma's eyes flashed and he seethed quietly on the roof, gripping the roof even tighter. The wood cracked with Ranma's furious strength.
Get your bloody hands off her!
Ryoga was leaning in now, his face moving in closer.
Ranma was livid. His vision was spotted was red.
Stop! What are you doing?!
His eyes flashed and he was ready to pounce and pummel the damn pig-boy into the a grave when Akane had jerked away from him.
Ranma's anger dissipated and he breathed a sigh of relief that she had refused.
Ryoga's face crumbled, "… Is it still not enough yet?"
Akane's bottom lip trembled, small tears in her eyes appeared and her body shook a little under the gi.
Ranma ached to comfort her, to feel her warmth and take her hand.
The pig-tailed martial artist watched as the two stood there in silence, both with pained looks on their faces.
Finally, Ryoga rasped out, "I... I'll wait for you, for as long as you take."
Akane smiled, wiping her tears, "I'm almost there, the pain is almost gone. I just.. need a little bit more time."
"Is Ranma is still such a big part of your life?"
The boy in question straightened, heart clenching at Ryoga's statement. A small, bit of hope bloomed in his heart. Was it not too late?
Akane's face immediately hardened, her voice icy, "No. He'll never be in my life again. I'm moving on and I'll never look back."
Ranma's hope was crushed, and his chest stabbed and shattered. He let out a soft gasp of pain, clutching his hand to his chest. The emotional pain was blindingly severe.
There was no hope. Absolutely nothing for him to do.
He'd never be back in her life again no matter how much he wanted.
Akane's anger had faded and her sad face stared at the ground.
"Even if Shampoo had tricked him, even with the contrary jewel, Ranma admitted he loved her of his own free will. That was his decision."
Ranma thought his heart had been crushed to the point of no return already, but the knife twisted further in his mutilated soul.
"It… it's too late. He can't apologize, and I haven't forgiven him."
No! He screamed in his mind, his mouth open as though to say the words but they never got past. It can't be! I never loved her, not once! I loved you!
"He had chosen."
A mistake! The worst regret I'll ever have!
"And after all, he never loved me."
No! No! I loved you with all my heart! Even if I couldn't admit it…
"He was just a coward and a jerk, stringing me along."
Akane, I never got to tell you-
"Did you know I had fallen in love with him?" Akane stated questioningly, as though it was a small, insignificant piece of information.
But to Ranma, it was the world. She… she loved me.. And I screwed it all up.
Immense pain, regret and happiness filled him to the brim. His twisted euphoria filled inside him, the feelings almost wanting to make him yell out to Akane. He wanted to beg, plead, cry, fight, anything to go back to her side.
She hmphed, "That was a long time ago," she hissed.
Ranma winced at the harshness of her tone.
"I haven't completely moved in, but I'm certain I don't love him anymore."
The pig-tailed boy's face crumpled. That was it. There was absolutely no solution. No way he would ever fix this.
She shrugged, "I'm marrying you tomorrow Ryoga, and I won't back out."
Ryoga expression was still a little downcast, but he had a small smile on his face.
"I wouldn't let you back out if you could." He smiled.
Akane smiled before her eyes wandered to the distance. "I always wanted a wedding in the summer. Where it's warm and bright and the blossoms are just blooming."
Ryoga approached her, "I remember you told me once. I'd never forget anything about you."
Akane returned his happiness with a smile of her own and the two leaned in for a kiss.
Ranma's soul burned at the two. His jealously and pain ripped through insides like acid. He was clinging on to the roof, his eyes scrunched as if to rid the horrifying image from his mind.
Why? Why? WHY? Why can't that be me?
He couldn't watch any longer. Ranma sprinted as fast as he could off the roof, gasping, trying to take in air that he couldn't feel in his lungs anymore.
Everything seemed to slow around him as though he was running thorugh water.
It… It was his fault. Everything.
If only he'd stop insulting her. Ate her cooking, not Ukyo's or Shampoo's.
Maybe there was reason behind her malleting when a girl got too close. Was that… love? Jealousy?
Was the he really so blind to the tomboy's affections?
And confessing to Shampoo…
He'd been willing to, for the sake of his pride and looks. He had to know he was desirable, that he still had "it". And he knew, when he said it, and she said it back. That he was desirable. Handsome. Irrestible.
He regained his pride then. Though the words he said to Shampoo were so wrong, so bitter in his mouth, he regained his ego, his selfish need to be wanted. But... he lost something so much more important.
"Shampoo, I… love you."
There was a slight pause, before Shampoo's eyes filled with love and hope, "Shampoo love airen as well!"
The café filled with lights and cheering, everything was happy in those few seconds but Ranma's heart felt like lead. His mouth filled with cotton and his stomach rolled in disgust at himself with what he just said.
Then he saw her.
Akane was at the door holding a duck Mousse. Watching the scene with wide eyes.
Her face was filled with terror and fear, as though what she was watching would crush her. Her face was as white as a ghost and her body looked so fragile as it quivered.
Ranma's face drained of blood, his voice dry.
No…no.. this isn't what you think! Wait… A strangled "A-Akane!" was all he could get out.
Akane's brown eyes filled with tears, pouring hot tracks on her face. Her face was scrunched up in agony as she fled from the room.
Wait! Wait! He wanted to scream!
No! Please!
By the time he struggled out of Shampoo's grip, Akane had already long fled.
He sprinted home so fast he legs almost gave out from the exhaustion.
A now human Mousse was holding the girl who cried into his shoulder, her small body shaking.
A dark feeling of jealousy coursed through, "What are you doing with Akane?" He hissed as he caught up to them.
He instinctively reached out for Akane, but she violently flinched away from him.
"No! No! Don't touch me!" She screamed.
Ranma jerked as though he were burned.
Mousse glared at Ranma. "I don't think you have any right to talk to Akane right now. Go on home to Shampoo. I already knew Shampoo loved you so I can accept this easier. But Akane's not as strong as us."
"She needs protection, and it won't be you." Ranma stated defiantly.
"At the moment, anyone is more welcome than you are."
"I-It was a mistake, it was just-"
"Tripping is a mistake, telling someone you love them is not, Saotome."
Ranma seethed, "Hey, this is between me and Akane, duck-boy. So why don't you-"
"WILL YOU SHUT UP AND LISTEN, RANMA?" The Amazon screamed in fury at the martial artist, his eyes blazing. Ranma closed his mouth, his eyes wide.
"It doesn't matter how much you want it, need it or plead. Akane is no longer yours. You have no right to her. Her heart is has been broken by you and deserves to be fixed by someone better. You have no one left, only Shampoo. When you uttered the words 'I love you' to someone else, Akane will never belong to you again."
Ranma was frozen. B-But it was just a mistake. He hadn't meant it, he just-
"You can never take them back."
Mousse swiftly left, Akane in his arms. She never looked so weak and frail. Her puffy eyes met his for a second before she violently looked away, a fresh wave of tears wracking her body.
Ranma stared after the two long after they left before his knees gave out and he collapsed in the street.
He had no right to love Akane. He didn't deserve her. But it was so unfair. All he wanted to do was prove that he worth something.
But that was it. His ego, his selfish needs, his pride… had blinded him to the needs of the person he most cared for.
Why did he have to go search for Shampoo's acceptance? It was clear to him, the hollow portion in his chest was gaping now, all he needed was Akane.
He should've treated her better. He shouldn't have been so blind to her. He shouldn't have been a coward and admitted it.
Instead, all he could do was betray her and hurt her.
Ranma shivered as the painful memories flooded back.
It had been three months since the day and not once had he not regretted it.
He was kicked out of the Tendo house, Akane refusing to look at him as Nabiki and Kasumi (even the docile girl was angry, though her face betrayed nothing) angrily kicked him out, threatening to tear his legs off if he ever came back.
He ended up at Nekohanten, Shampoo easily welcoming him was hugs and kisses.
But he suffered everyday.
Because of one mistake. One simple, stupid, impulsive mistake, Akane would never be his.
Damn his ego, his pride, he'd give away everything he owned to be with the woman he loved again.
His life was so empty without her passion, her protection, her rare laughs and smiles, her happiness, hell, even her cooking.
All of it… it was no longer his.
It was Ryoga's.
The damn pig boy had finally beaten him and something, and of all the things, it was Akane.
He loved her. He loved her so goddamn much.
Her spirit, her persistence, her love, her compassion.
Her anger, her fire, and heart, her determination.
Why couldn't he see it, he loved her even back then. She had loved him as well.
Loved.
Ranma's shoulders crumpled. There was no solution now.
There was nothing to be done.
"Do you, Ryoga, take Akane to be your lawfully wedded husband?"
"I do." The desire and pride in his voice was clear.
"Do you, Akane, take Ryoga to be your lawfully wedded husband?"
Akane smiled, so breathtakingly beautiful in her wedding dress. "I do."
" You may kiss the bride." The priest smiled.
Ranma clenched his eyes shut and turned away while Shampoo clapped loudly .
Ranma forced himself to go the wedding. It was Akane's big day, and he had to make up for his mistake little by little.
He wasn't prepared for painful it was going to be.
Ryoga and Akane, matching white and looking perfect, walked down the aisle with smiles on their faces.
Ranma's heart squeezed as he watched Akane's beautiful smile.
Their eyes for a moment, and she looked stunned that he was there.
After a moment's hesitation, she offered a small smile.
Ranma could only stare after her, shocked with her beauty and ability to forgive.
If only I told you I loved you….
I hope he treats you right. I hope he's not the bastard I was.
But, Akane… I'll always be there for you.
Just please… don't even forget me…
-~#~-