Something that strives to be, yet cannot be

Disclaimer: I do not, will not, and never have owned J.K. Rowlings' Harry Potter nor do I own anything related.

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Chapter 1

Draco

Her velvet brown hair, flowing in the gentle breeze. Her gaze across the great lake, the soft sun setting all around her. Her petite body wrapped in Slytherin green satin rolling in the winds off of the waters. Her eyes tenderly closed as her head fell ever so slightly backwards. She took an extensive breath deeply into her lungs, a kind smile touched the corners of her exquisite pink lips. She looked truly free. My eyes fixated on her for what seemed like hours as I observed from under a cascading willow tree, through the spaces in-between its branches I was enveloped, in awe of the most beautiful creature. I knew not to whether she knew I was there, nor did I care. Her freedom truly enchanted me, just as she did. She'd opened her gloriously warm eyes as the sun had set and advanced into the shallows of the lake, the water submerging her bare feet. Her satin streaming in the flow of the water enveloping her soft legs, she advanced through the water until she had to swim. She lay back into the water. Floating as if a weightless flower petal on its surface.

I had to see her, I had to tell her. I lost all control, I paced towards her, each stride closing the distance between us. She didn't move, she never looked up, she didn't flinch as the movement of the water changed. My legs encased in the cool water with the moonlight rippling down onto us. I reached out for her perfect hand. Marching to her in haste, and finally, the collision of our hands surged through my body as electricity igniting my very dark soul, the light of hers cascading onto it. I pulled her up and our bodies crashed together, our faces inches apart. The entirety of me blazing with fire, my arms crushed around her as if too much space will forever be between us. Her perfect eyes set upon mine, I couldn't look away even if I wanted to, not for a second. Her shallow breath flowing on my skin, the smell of vanilla entrapped me, I couldn't breath, my lungs not functioning, my thoughts elusive to me, my entire world on its edge, electricity between our lips that weren't even touching. Silence surrounded us, the whole world spinning yet standing still between us. My heart racing, jumping out of my chest. My ribs violently beating. Desire, lust, like, love, joy, pleasure, happiness all rippling through my body. Her gentle sweet hands swept slowly through my hair cradling the back of my head, she leaned even closer to my lips, our eyes never separating. Her lips parting slightly as she whispered,

"Draco" the softness of her breath paralyzing me, gently she sighed "Draco wake up".

My eyes flew open. Disappointment and frustration drowned my body. I lay there, with a heavy heart. A sigh escaped my lungs. The dream already fading in my memory. A shadow of another day hanging over my head, for this was another start to a year at Hogwarts.

Hermione

Tapping from the window of the Weasley's house echoed around the kitchen. I placed my copy of the daily prophet on the rough surface of the wooden table. The tapping continued for at least 5 minutes, I irritably glared at Ron who seemed as if he was ignoring it, hoping it would leave so he didn't have to interrupt his meal time face stuffing session.

"Ron? There's an owl at the window? Aren't you going to get it?" I questioned him in an inpatient haste. After all it was his house, it was most likely going to be his family mail. Ron let out a sigh of his stuffed face. He set his cutlery down and abandoned his piled breakfast and ambled towards the window where the owl impatiently waited. As Ron unlatched the windows lock the huge golden brown owl zeroed in on me, diving across my plate, leaving an envelope on my lap. The great owl glided around circling the small kitchen and finally resting, perched on the back of an empty dinning chair. I glanced down at the letter in my lap.

"To Miss Hermione Granger" was scrawled on the front, hastily flipping it over to its seal, the Hogwarts stamp imprinted in the rich Gryffindor red wax I tore it open rashly.

"Oh blast!" I squealed rather unflatteringly. Ron who had resumed to stuffing his face full of breakfast, leaped from his chair and ran to my side.

"What? What's happened?" he frantically asked.

"Sorry, no its nothing, I just cut my finger on the envelope" I now regretfully sighed. Ron rolled his eyes and slumbered back into his chair to finish what he'd started.

"Women" he spoke in an annoyed hushed tone whilst again rolling his eyes. I glared at the ginger haired boy and glanced back to the letter.

"Miss H. Granger, I am delighted to inform you that for the final year of your Hogwarts school life we have deemed you fit for you to preform the role of Head Girl. We believe you have attributed much to the school in your years here and are a fantastic role model to all students. We hope that you accept this and inform us of your answer as soon as possible seeing we're all to return Back to school tomorrow evening. We would be delighted for you to accept this great responsibility, if the acceptation is granted by yourself you will have separate dormitories for the duration of the final year from your Gryffindor house along with the appointed Head Boy, you will have to preform certain duties and roles together as an efficient team. We will inform you in greater detail before classes Monday in the Head Masters office. Please arrive promptly. Best wishes for the remainder of your time at Hogwarts.

Professor McGonagall."

My jaw dropped as my eyes filled with a glaze, I re-read the letter at least five times to confirm that I am not in fact hallucinating. A loud squeal erupted from my lungs as I pranced around the kitchen waving my letter in the air. 6 years I've waited for this moment, 6 whole years, and its finally arrived. More of the Weasley's ran into the kitchen along with Harry to the sound of my squealing. Continuing to run around the kitchen like a lunatic, Ron rolling his eyes not even bothering to ask what in fact am I so excited about.

"What Hermione? What's wrong?!" Harry cried.

"What's wrong?! What's right Harry?! That's the question!" I exclaimed beaming a smile that had erupted several minutes ago ear to ear. They all continued to stare at the freak show running around like a basket case.

Harry grabbed me by the shoulders as I attempted to prance past, "Hermione, calm down." He instructed. "Now are you going to tell us what the hell you're on about?" Sounding slightly frustrated I handed him the letter. He quickly sucked in a breath as his own face erupted with a smile and picked me up and span me around too quickly for me to react I tilted my head back with uncontrollable laughter breaking out of my lungs. "HERMIONE! THIS IS FANTASTIC!" He continued to spin and laugh along with me.

"Can somebody please tell me what on earth is happening right now" Ginny losing patients with me and Harry. With a slightly envious gleam in her eyes.

"Hermione's head girl!" Harry beamed before I could even react. Now every one sharply inhaled, cheering soon followed and congratulations.

For the rest of the night I couldn't stay still, a smile hasn't left my lips since I'd opened the letter. Molly Weasley had even cooked a large dinner to celebrate my Head girl position. In all honestly I think she just likes to find an excuse to take care of everyone. After the big dinner everyone said their good-night's and all headed up to bed early to catch the morning train to Hogwarts.

That night I tossed and turned grinning and attempting miserably to contain my laughter, Ginny occasionally hissing at me to stop wriggling so much, but I couldn't contain it, everything was so perfect! At about 2 a.m. I was starting to actually get tired when it dawned on me that this was the last time we'd be boarding the train to Hogwarts, the last year, then our whole lives will change. Sadness flooded my body as the realisation hit me. The last year ever at Hogwarts. I didn't feel ready; I didn't want to leave. I wasn't ready. The flickering glow of the fire in the lanterns died down as my eyes began to feel heavy, so heavy that eventually they remained closed, and I drifted to sleep.

Thundering grey eyes met mine. The most striking eyes. Our gazes never faltering, my paralysed body crushed to his, water rippling around our bodies. His arms held me in a tight vice around my waist, lifting me off of the lakes bed. The warmth of his body radiating through the thin material that hung around my body. Our faces so close I could feel his calm breath on my face as he stared into my soul. Fire surged through the core of my body, through my soul all the while our bodies were intertwined. He leaned closer to my face now just millimetres apart our lips were, his lips slightly parted. He let out a relieve sigh.

"Hermione" his voice chimed around me, my heart fluttering at an uncontrollable rate. His calm voice echoed "Hermione my love, you need to wake up".

My dreary eyes slowly opened as the warm sun heated my face. I leaped to my feet, forgetting completely of the dream that had already faded in my memory, I never could remember any of my dreams, I sprinted to where I had neatly laid my clothes out to prepare for my most favourite day of the year. I rushed to get ready, ready for Hogwarts, another glorious year at Hogwarts, as the Head Girl! Smirking the whole time, we'd arrived at platform 9 3/4 in Kings Cross. Eagerly awaiting the boarding of the Hogwarts Express. The platform was so hectic, people greeting, people leaving, farewells until Christmas being spoken. First year mothers cried as the last year mothers cheered, the incredible atmosphere intoxicating everyone, this is Hogwarts.

"Hermione? Hermione. We're boarding now" Harry raised his voice over the masses to inform me. Happiness now surging through me, I hopped aboard the mighty red train. Harry, Ron and Ginny by my side. As always. Glancing around at them, remembering everything we've been through, remembering the good and the bad, it's hard to have forgotten the past, and the loss we've all been burnt by, yet in this moment, true delight washed over everyone, touching each and everyone of our hearts to truly be happy in this single moment, we we're all grinning like idiots. I led all of us down the trains corridors that links the carriages. Continuing to grin like fools, chatting and laughter filled the air as I came across an empty carriage.

"Found one!" I exclaimed with utter glee. I heaved the heavy old carriage door open with all my might and skipped to the benched seat. Ginny following next pranced right next to me, then Ron and harry sitting opposite us. Ginny glanced up at Harry who was sitting directly opposite only to find his eyes gazing down at her with amusement.

"What?" Ginny demanded as her face filled red with embarrassment.

"Just you, Gin" Harry spoke amusingly to lean over the space between them and plant a gentle kiss on her lips.

"UGH GUYS! Bloody hell, Really? Right in front of me! I think I'm going to vomit" Ron spat in displeasure.

A giggle escaped my lips and a sudden jolt of jealousy panged through my heart, not because of who it was, just purely because of the affection and love they had for one another, that I've never had with someone else. To Ron's annoyance Harry didn't react and continued to kiss Ginny for a couple of seconds and then slumped back into the cushioned bench. With a wink to Ginny who was now positively as red as her hair he erupted in contagious laughter, along with Ginny and my self. Ron face plastered with a very unhappy glare to all of us. Ron's terrible mood continued all throughout the journey, until of course-

"Anything from the trolley?" A tender old voice chimed through the air. Ron's face automatically engulfed by a grin, his hand plunged into his pocket to reveal coins he exchanged for 2 chocolate frogs, 3 pumpkin pastries and many, many jelly slugs.

"Ugh Ron" Ginny said with a strong tone of disgust. "How can you eat that much? We'll be having dinner when we get there!" He barely replied but with a grunt and a glare he resumed to eating his treasured food.

"Hey 'Mione? Who do you think Head Boy will be?" Harry said as his eye brows pulled together into a frown.

I felt my face pull into a frown as did Ginny, Ron however didn't even realise Harry was speaking, "I haven't the slightest idea" a tone of curiosity filled my words.

"Well what's the worst that could happen hm?" Harry shrugged noticing the worry that coated Hermione's face.

"Yeah don't worry about it, they'll have to be a good student to be Head Boy right? There's nothing to worry about" Ginny spoke up to reassure Hermione also.

"Yeah you're right, it couldn't possible be anyone but good, to be Head Boy you wouldn't be able to be anything but. Would they?" She then attempted to reassured herself. In the same moment a breeze of platinum blonde flew past the window in the corridor of the carriages.

"Was that- that couldn't be- was that? Malfoy?" The horror in Harry's voice present sent a shudder through all four of us. "That can't be?" the colour drained from Harry's face "It can't be- Malfoy?"

The rest of the journey was spent in almost silence, just the thundering of the rain beating the windows of the train, black clouds filling the sky, I leaned on the window watching the rolling landscape on the Journey to Hogwarts.

Draco

Platform 9 ¾ filled with students of Hogwarts. I don't even know why I tried so hard to be accepted back into this hell hole. The next year will be one spent in a comeuppance of ridicule. I could feel my stoic expression numbing my face as I attempted to avoid everyone. I quickly stepped onto the Slytherins carriage to find an empty part of the train. Obviously I underestimated the pure number of Slytherins because soon this section of the train was full, and the next thing I knew, Blaise, Pansy and Crabbe all surrounded me. Their annoying chattering aggravated me for at least three quarters of the journey, honestly I couldn't care less about what Pansy's summer was like or how Blaise went to the Netherlands and saw Norwegian Ridgebacks. I slumped myself into the corner of the carriage by the window and watched the rain tapping againt the window of the train. Fortunately up to that point no one had attempted to make any contact with me until-

"Hey Draco. You've been awfully quiet." Pansy purred into my ear as she edged closer to me. "How was your summer?" She was now resting her rather large chest onto my arm- repulsive slag.

"Absolutely Brilliant" the sarcasm dripped from each word as they slithered out of my sharp mouth. And without another word, avoiding looking at any of them, to which I assume they would all be pissed off due to my brusque behaviour, I rose to my feet and swiftly left. Almost sprinting past each carriage I realised I don't even know where I'm trying to escape to. Continuing to walk past carriage after carriage I eventually found one full of first years. I abruptly yanked the door open with a delightful smirk slapped across my face, I politely asked them all to leave.

"Get. Out!" My tone as harsh as I intended it to be, their eyes widened with fear, silence hung in the carriage, they sat in shock for what seemed like forever. Impatiently, "NOW!". To which they scurried to their pathetic little feet and ran out of the carriage as if it were on fire. I strolled to the bench and sat by the window and resumed to engross in my malaise and stared out the window to the now hammering rain that danced across the window of the swift train.

What was this year really going to be like? It was either this or being locked in my house for the rest of the bloody year. My mother had insisted that I came back and tried to prove her proud by excelling in all my NEWT's, but honestly I didn't give a shit about my NEWT's. After everything that has happened, I doubt that this year will be anything but hell. And the fact that Hermione Granger is Head Girl is just going to perpetuate the situation. I slung me head back to wait for the train to eventually come to a halt.

God. Help me.