Ol' Chap

Monday Night RAW: Fastlane, the new WWE ppv was fastly approaching. Wade Barrett's music filled the arena and out he walked in a suit, and the Intercontinental title over his right shoulder. His black hair slicked back, his beard neat and trimmed. He made his way into the ring, smirking obnoxiously. He walked over to the other side of the ring demanding for the microphone. His music ceased as he stepped into the middle of the ring. He began to address the crowd speaking in a heavy British accent.

"Fastlane...is quickly drawing near. And I have a challenger coming for my Intercontinental championship belt. And his name...is Dean...Ambrose."

The crowd cheered at the name of the man from Cinncinatti, Ohio. Wade Barrett, also known as Bad News Barrett, cackled into the mic before speaking again.

"For those of you who think that that gutter rat, that psycho, that...that so-called lunatic fringe, is going to take this title away from my grasp, well then, as I always say, I'm afraid I've got some bad news. Dean Ambrose, you don't stand a chance against me, Bad News Barrett. I will be walking out of Fastlane the winner and still Intercontinental champion. And there is nothing, nothing, you can do about it."

The crowd booed at Bad News Barrett's cockiness. Just then, an instrumental British theme played over the arena speakers. Barrett turned his eyes to see a man walk out onto the ramp. Barrett had no idea who this man was whom was eyeing him, until the man took off his derby from his head. It was Dean Ambrose. Instead of the usual jeans, tanktop, wrestling boots, and taped wrists, Dean Ambrose was donning a black fish-tailed coat, black slacks, black shoes, white gloves, black cane, and a white button-down dress shirt. He looked dashing, dapper and quite sharp. He replaced the hat atop his head and began to walk towards the ring in a proper, sophisticated, manner. He had an etiquetteness about him.

Dean ascended the stell steps, then entered the ring. Barrett was disgusted at Dean's appearance and most disgusted at what he was wearing. Dean walked over to the other side of the ring and politely requested for the microphone. The British music died down as Dean cast his blue eyes towards his opponent at Fastlane. Dean looked at the crowd, whom was chanting his name. He brought the mic to his lips and began to speak, but in a smooth, raspy British accent.

" 'Ello, Ol' Chap," Dean greeted causing the audience to laugh.

"Dean Ambrose. Look at you. You look ridiculous." Dean looked down at himself. "You look like an idiot."

Dean looked up at Bad News Barrett. "What?" he queried. "You...you don't like my attire? Oh, dear. My dear fellow. I think everybody here disagrees with you. They happen to like my new threads."

The crowd cheered in agreement with females adding a few wolf whistles towards him. Dean softly chuckled at the audience. "Thank you. Thank 're too kind. Honestly."

"Ambrose. How dare you make fun of my country. The music, the clothes, the accent. How dare you!"

"Make fun, Ol' Chap?"

"Don't call me Ol' Chap. I hate that."

"Now now now, Wade Barrett. No need to be rude and interrupt. That's not proper etiquette." The crowd laughed. Dean cleared his throat before resuming to speak. "As I was saying. Make fun? Good heavens. Heavens to Betsy, no. I would never make fun of your home grounds. Certainly not me. Would I do that? Never. As a matter of fact, I'm insulted. For you to think that I would purposefully insult your British home. The thought..." Dean approached Barrett in the center of the ring. "perposterous. Absolutely dreadful for you to think such an atrocious thought. I'm not here to insult your country. I'm here to insult you."

The crowd cheered again. Dean continued his taunting to Barrett, continuing to speak in a British accent. "I'm here to tell you that your days are numbered as Intercontinental champion. Your reign as champion is coming to an end. And at Fastlane, I'm gonna bring that title to my country, the United States of America." The crowd erupted into 'USA' chants before Dean concluded his speech. "I've even got some more bad news for you, Barrett. You will fall and you will fall hard. You will fall like...how does that song go? Oh yeah." Dean began singing. "London bridge is falling down, falling down, falling down. London bridge is falling down, my fair Barrett. And that is how it's going to be...Ol' Chap."

The audience laughed and cheered, chanting 'Ambrose! Ambrose! Ambrose!" Bad News Barrett brought the mic to his mouth, laughing sarcastically.

"Very funny, Dean. Very funny. Dean Ambrose is a comedian. Look everyone! It's Dean Ambrose the comedian! Well, you know what? I can be funny too! Here! Let me show you!"

Dean never expected it. He never saw it coming. The open palm of Barrett's right hand struck him right across the face causing the crowd to gasp in shock. Dean began to pant through his nose.

"Now that's funny...Ol' Chap." Barrett taunted laughing once more.

Dean slowly turned his angry blue eyes upward to Barrett. Dean looked mad as he flexed his jaw, his left hand rubbing his cheek. Then a smirk appeared on Dean's face. He raised the microphone to his lips.

"Okay. That was funny," he said continuing his British accent. "But here's the thing. It wasn't that funny. You did it all wrong, lad." Dean nestled the black cane under his left arm, switching the mic to his left hand. "If you're going...to slap somebody...it has to be like this."

Dean reached up with his right hand, slapping the taste out of Barrett's mouth. Barrett dropped the microphone to the canvas, as did Dean. Barrett took hold of the title in both hands. With a yell, he went to strike Dean in the head with the belt. Dean ducked out of the way swinging to Barrett's right. Dean held the cane in both hands like a bat. When Barrett turned around, Dean swung and connected with Barrett's ribs, causing him to drop the title. Dean tossed the cane aside, pulled Barrett's head under his arm, restraining Barrett's arms behind his back, then fell backward planting Barrett's face into the mat, hitting him with his finished Dirty Deeds.

Dean rose to his feet, adjusting the derby atop his hat. He picked up the title in both hands, gazing at it with a yearning and desire. He held the title in his left arm as he picked up the mic from the mat. He spoke once more, dropping the accent altogether.

"No more fun and games, Bad News Barrett. No more jokes. No more funny business. It's time to get serious. At Fastlane, I will take the championship away from you. This belt will be mine. I will let the monster inside of me roam free. I will be walking out of Fastlane the new WWE Intercontinental champion!" The audience cheered as he draped the title across the back of his opponent. Dean bent down to pick up his cane and spoke once more in his British accent.

"Cherrio...Ol' Chap."

Dean dropped the mic to the canvas as his theme music played throughout the arena with the capacity crowd once again cheering his name. He bent down and retrieved the cane from the canvas, then walked over to the ropes, and rolled under the bottom rope exiting the ring. He looked at his prey lying on the mat stomach first. Dean took off his hat, and bowed. He replaced the hat on his head running his fingers on the hat brim. A lunatic smile shown on Dean's face. He gave his opponent a little wink before turning and walking up the ramp.

THE END