Okay so this is kind a sequel to my one shot A Different Kind of Magic that I wrote with my friend. We had too much fun so we wrote another one with more of a humorous twist focusing on their bachelor(ette) parties =P We were thinking of extending it and writing 5 more and calling them all installments of The "Lily and James Chronicles."And obviously there would be 7 =) Well the name needs work but you get the point, if you like these and want us to continue review purty please =)
So like I said this one is more humorous but still has some of the cute moments between Lily and James that our last fic had. And again I didn't write this alone, I had help from an equally obsessed fan/friend. Who am I kidding I'm totally more obsessed than her =) So here it goes, James and Lily's bachelor parties! Oh and if you notice we're really mean to Wormtail but we hate him so we had to. =) It also works into the plot line of a possible sequel to this fic if you opt yes to the chronicle idea.
Also sorry to any British people who read this and get annoyed at our attempt to sound kinda British. We aren't making fun or anything I swear, we were just having fun writing this and we were really hyper so we apologize ahead of time for anything you might find annoying! We even asked her Scottish dad for a British/European beer in hopes to appease you so hope you like it!
Here For The Party
Lily's POV
Most girls have their dream weddings planned out by the age of six. Okay that might be an exaggeration, but you get the point. I wasn't so concerned about the wedding, it would be perfect no matter what once I found the right person. I had more fun dreaming about my bachelorette party. I had never been a party girl, so this was the perfect chance to let loose and have some truly insane fun. But then they had to ruin it.
Aren't your friends supposed to know things like that? The close ones I mean. Yeah a crazy and wild party wasn't usually my style but that's the point of a bachelorette party! And you only get one...well you should. My friends didn't throw me a bachelorette [arty, they threw me a bloody senior's party! Right down to the fuzzy tiaras and boring games. The closest I got to crazy was Annie's gag gift. I'll have to thank her for that later. Then again, I shouldn't have expected anything less from Sirius' girlfriend. Time for the champagne, joy. What I wouldn't give for a beer right now.
James POV
"Cheers mates!" I'd almost downed the whole mug of Butterbeer when Sirius chipped in.
"This isn't a time for happiness Prongs, this is a time for grief, for mourning! In three days, you'll be tied down. No more girls for you mate!"
"Since when has he ever wanted another girl anyway?" Remus interrupted.
"I'm talking here Moony," Sirius continued.
"Sure he may not have chased after other girls, but at least he had his fun. Now you can't even look at another girl, Lily'd be on you in a second. This is your future, waking up to the same damn woman...every morning...for years and years and-"
I was done listening to this. "Last time I checked Sirius, you and Annie had been together for a while."
"Yeah but she ain't as uptight as your girl." An obscene gesture accompanied this statement.
"Shut up Sirius," I said while smacking him upside the head.
"Yeah Padfoot, better be careful," Remus said. "You don't want to scar poor innocent Wormtail here." Peter just blushed and stared into his barely touched Butterbeer.
"Enough of this mates, it's my bachelor party. Let's go play some Quidditch!"
"What are we gonna use for a snitch?" Remus asked. Sirius snatched my engagement ring off my finger so fast I barely had time to notice.
"Got us a little golden beauty right here."
"Padfoot be bloody careful! If you lose that Lily will murder me!"
"Just use a Summoning charm! Honestly, you're becoming more like a Muggle every day. Another problem with marrying Evans."
I smacked him for what was sure to be the first of many times. "Shut up." Only I'm allowed to call her that.
Lily's POV
Someone kill me, now. We were on our 5th round of charades. This is worse than History of Magic class with Professor Binns. Listening to one of James' quidditch rants was more interesting than this. Hell, paint drying is more interesting than this. I can't take it anymore.
"Excuse me ladies, but I have to go to the loo." Of course I went straight to my room instead, but found that someone was already there.
"Annie, what are you doing?"
"Oh, nothing! Clearing my head."
"Cut the crap and give me some of that beer."
"Oh thank god," she sighed in relief as I sat beside her and took a swig of her Tennants Lager.
"Still not enough," I said as I handed Annie back the bottle.
"What this party needs is some shots," Annie said as she finished the beer.
"And strippers," I added. Annie gasped in mock surprise.
"Lily! I'm shocked!" I rolled my eyes. "What about your poor virgin eyes?" That earned her an elbow to the ribs.
"Oh shut up Annie. Let's go back, they probably think I've climbed out the window."
"Or you're taking a piss the size of Niagara Falls."
"Annie!" We were laughing all the way back to the living room, until a few familiar faces at the window stopped the laughter abruptly. "Annie, don't look, but our boyfriends are at the window."
"Bloody hell! Don't they know the meaning of a bachelorette party!"
"Not yet," Thanks to James I was finally going to get my wild party. First things first, I'd need help. "Ow! Damn midgies!" I yelled while I swatted an invisible bug.
"Mind letting me in on why you're acting like such a looney?" Annie whispered in my ear.
"Remember that code between Remus and me in 7th year?" I glanced back quickly to check he had got it. He had.
"Allies on enemy lines, brilliant!" Annie smiled. Of course she could tell what I was planning. "Time for the muggle strippers!"
"Why muggles?"
"So much more creative than wizards," Annie giggled. "And an owl takes too long." She picked up my barely used telephone and dialed.
James POV
1 hour earlier
"Same teams as always then?" Remus asked.
"Splendid, I get you again," Sirius complained, as usual.
"Better Moony than Wormtail here," I replied. I glanced back at Peter and realized he either hadn't heard, or didn't care. Either way was fine.
"Come off it Prongs, you know you'll still win," Sirius continued griping.
"Obviously Padfoot, we have to let him win," Remus joked. "It is his bachelor party."
"Oh please, you couldn't win if you had the entire Scottish quidditch team behind you."
"Scottish, oh please," Sirius scoffed before being cut off by Remus' hand on his mouth.
"Let's not start this argument again."
"You're right," I muttered a quick spell over my ring, causing it to grow wings. "Let's play some Quidditch." I released the ring into the air and picked up a discarded black and white ball for the quaffle. We'd have to do without bludgers today, but for Wormtail's sake that was probably a good thing.
As usual, I had to play all of the positions since Peter was too pre-occupied trying to stay on his broom. But we were still winning. I wasn't too concerned about the snitch because I knew neither of them had the keen eyes to see it. I knew it would turn up eventually. Considering all of the mead and butterbeer I had in me, I made some pretty spectacular moves and saves. The best of the night being when I spun 360 degrees avoiding Remus' grasp for the quaffle, leapt off my broom over Sirius and made quite a graceful landing, and completed it with a daring toss through one of our conjured hoops. And if that wasn't enough, I sped across the field at break-neck speed making it back in time for yet another save. After 45 minutes I had finally caught the snitch, aka my engagement ring. Thank goodness. Final score: 450 to 120.
I felt much less co-ordinated on the ground. Maybe because it was standing still, yet everything else was moving.
"Don't let this go to your head. I coulda won, I shoulda won, I-" Sirius was yet again interrupted by Remus.
"Well then maybe you shouldn't drink so much next time," he chided.
"Well then what's your excuse Peter?" Sirius chuckled.
I cut him off by saying, "now what lads?"
"It's your party mate. Why are you asking us?" Sirius came over and looped his arm around my shoulder, but I suspected it was more for balance than a friendly gesture.
"To be quite frank with you blokes, I miss my Lily." The large sweeping gesture I made while saying this managed to nail Peter in the face.
"Watch yourself Peter," was the closest I got to an apology.
"That's not such a bad idea there Prongs." A grin appeared on Sirius' face that all our past professors had come to fear.
"Oh no, you can't be serious," Remus sighed.
"Well, of course I am. I'm not James, duh!"
"yeah you just wish you were," I said as I shoved him what I thought was lightly but he toppled right over. Then finally his plan dawned on me. "We're going to go see Lily!"
"Crash her party more likely."
"Can we at least use the cloak? This is one scheme I'd rather not be affiliated with."
"Moony, where's your sense of fun?"
"Fine, let the baby have his bottle. Here it is." I started to cover us with the cloak.
"Hold up Prongs, where'd that come from?" Sirius asked tentatively.
"You don't want to know," I replied.
"Oh, lovely James," Remus said disgusted. I probably could tell them I shrunk it to fit in my pocket...nah.
"Now where would she be," I asked trying to steady Sirius.
"Well, I did hear some rather intoxicated muggles talking about a place men and women go on their bachelor parties. Also something about the articles of clothing...or lack-there-of." Now Sirius was trying to make me angry. But, wait, WHAT?!
"Seems like muggles party same way we do on this occasion," Remus said while nudging me with his elbow. He was trying to get a rise out of me like Sirius, and it was working.
"Lily would never do that to me!" I hope.
"Enough of this, let's just go check." After a few uncomfortable seconds, we were right outside Lily's living room window.
"It's a fucking tea party!" Sirius laughed. Oh thank god. "Do you think she even knows the meaning of a bachelorette party? Honestly, she's cute and all but I really don't know what else you see in her," Sirius continued.
"Finished bashing my fiancee now have you?" I said angrily.
"Calm down, I'm only joking."
"Remus, you've been awfully quiet." I glanced over at him to see he wasn't even paying attention and had a sneaky-looking smile on his face.
"Great, one friend's insulting my fiancee and the other's checking her out!"
"What? Oh no...I wasn't!"
"Don't blame you mate, there's some fine looking girls in there," Sirius joked.
"One of which is your girlfriend," Remus replied.
"That's who I meant."
"Hey, look! People are starting to leave already!" I pointed out.
"No wonder. This party's dull."
"Or over," Remus added. I faintly heard a knock on the door but didn't think much of it. Until I saw the excitement on Lily's face.
"What's got her so excited?" I asked.
"Them." Sirius pointed to a few men holding six-packs of Bodingtons and wearing nowhere near enough clothes. Remus burst into hysterics, partly from the scene in front of us and partly from how low my jaw was. Inside many girls were blaming Annie for the mens' appearance.
"That's my girl," Sirius said.
"Why do our girlfriends have to be friends?" Never had I wished this more than when those men began to dance. I use dancing for lack of a better word. As much as I wanted to look away, I couldn't. They were near my Lily!
"You look a little peaky there mate," Sirius said. "Something troubling you?" I just glared at him, oh if looks could kill. But I got my revenge when Annie started to get friendly and party hardy with the men.
"What? What! What is she doing!" Sirius pressed his face closer to the window if that was even possible.
"Ha!" was my only response. The "fun" inside had forced a few of Lily's more prudish friends (who I could only assume had planned the beginning of the party) out the door already. For once I wish Lily was more like them.
"This is what you get for spying James," Remus said between snorts of laughter. This earned another glare.
"Hey Lily," Annie said from inside, "now would be the perfect time to try out the new present I got you."
"I thought that was more for James' pleasure," she replied. Oh shit.
"He's not here, he'll never know. And besides, we need to make sure it fits," Annie said with a wink. Lily disappeared to her bedroom for what seemed like agonizingly painful hours. When she came back, I nearly fainted.
Surprisingly, Peter was the first to speak. "Bloody hell!" Although I wanted to slap him, I couldn't help but agree.
She was wearing what had to be the tightest purple corset with a dark satin ribbon at the top. That same colour ribbon lined the top of a tiny black pleated skirt. Then not much lower down began the longest and sexiest black leather boots I'd ever seen.
"Damn Potter, you lucky bastard!" Sirius' voice interrupted my fantasizing. "If you don't marry her I will!" He was right, three days was way too far away. "But the best of friends share everything right?" He nudged my side and winked.
"Ok, that's it!" I was done listening to his jokes tonight. I muttered a quick curse under my breath.
"What the hell Potter, I was only kidding," Sirius whined.
"James, what did you do?" Remus asked curiously.
"Blinded him," I replied matter-of-factly.
"Normally I would have criticized you, but I have to say I agree. Good one."
"James, I promise I won't say anything else about Lily, just undo it."
"No."
"Then at least tell me what the hell is going on in there!" I was considering saying no to this too, but then I saw Lily and Annie dancing...together. I'd seen much worse, but Sirius didn't need to know that. Besides it was still Lily.
"You asked for it. Lily and Annie are dancing now."
"Oh please, what is it, the Hokey Pokey?" I laughed in spite of myself.
"Not exactly," Remus answered. I glanced over and realized he was thinking the same thing I was.
"What do you mean?" Sirius sounded worried.
"Where did they learn that?" Remus said. He's pretty good at this.
"If their skirts were just a little shorter..." I added.
"James, give me my sight back please! Annie's my girlfriend too remember!"
"I didn't even think they could bend that way," Remus said sounding genuinely shocked, completely ignoring Sirius.
"I wish I could trade places with those me right now." This statement was completely true. The problems started when the girls began dancing in a way that made our previous statements true.
"Right, enough of this!" Sirius said as he stormed off. Oh no, he wouldn't...no, he would. Bollocks!
Lily's POV
I was wondering how much longer I could hold out when Sirius burst through the door.
"Annie, Lily, stop that this in-OW! Bloody hell!" Running into the table made his entrance more comedic than dramatic.
"Sirius what's wrong with you?" Annie asked.
"Nothing!" James clapped his hand over Sirius' mouth and whispered something before he could shove his hand away.
"About time!" Sirius shouted while rubbing his eyes.
"Alright, party's over! Everybody go home!" James shouted. "Especially you!" He pointed at the strippers and surprisingly I felt more like hugging him than laughing at him. As everyone was leaving, Remus came in clutching his sides from laughter.
"That was brilliant Lily!"
"What!!!!" James and Sirius both shouted.
"This fell off while ago," Remus said holding up the cloak.
"Besides, serves you right for spying," I said.
"And party crashing!" Annie added.
I noticed the absence of a fourth mousier smaller person. "Where's Peter?" I asked. "Thought I saw him too?"
"Yeah, where is Peter?" James asked.
"I think he left, crying," Remus replied. "I think we really might have scarred him this time."
"Right. Well I hope you boys learned your lesson," I said. "You best be off now."
'Aww, no make-up sex?" Sirius said with a horrible smirk on his face.
"OUT!" Annie said shoving both Sirius and Remus out the door. I walked over to say goodbye to James.
"I really am sorry Lil," he said as he wrapped his arms around me. It's amazing how much I missed that each time we were apart.
"It's OK," I said, "you're cute when you're jealous."
"I've had lots of practice." It was moments like this where I knew marrying him was the right thing to do. Years and years of work and rejection, of watching me pass him over for other guys, but he still loved me.
I gave him a peck on the lips and walked him to the door. "By the way, went you the bill."
There it is, review review review!!! =)