So here's a quick little prologue! Chapter 1 is already in the works and is expected to be pretty good, but I'm not saying when it'll be up. Relatively soon, I hope, since it's summer and I have time to write.
Anyway, since Chapter 1 isn't up yet, I'd appreciate lots of reviews telling me what you like and what you dislike so I can make sure to keep up the likes and get rid of those things you dislike. I generally try to make my readers happy, so please don't be shy in telling me what you wish I'd write (in regards to this story-I don't mean fanfic requests!) and what you wish I'd stop doing in my writing. Honestly, it's been a while since I've written any fiction, so this could be a little shaky. But hopefully it'll improve since I plan on updating frequently. Again, no promises-my schedule is seriously unpredictable! But I'll try.
Especially if I get reviews!
Anyway, even if you don't review, please enjoy this chapter and remember to subscribe if you want to see what more this story has to offer.
Oh, and one last thing. The title of this fanfic comes from the song by Innerpartysystem, also called This Empty Love. The song's amazing and is giving me huge inspiration. I recommend looking it up! As well as Don't Stop and especially American Trash by the same group. They're pretty cool.
But I'm done talking now, for those of you who are actually reading this and impatiently waiting for it to end. Hope you like the prologue!
This Empty Love, Promise
"Naruto! Please, please . . ."
Blue eyes looked up to meet tear-filled green, and a strong sense of deja vu hit Naruto.
This was just like the last time, four years ago, with tears streaming down Sakura's face and her eyes squeezed shut as she began pleading with Naruto. Pleading with him for . . . something related to Sasuke. This time would be no different, Naruto was sure, because the only time Sakura ever came to him like this was when it had something to do with the Uchiha. But he had to wonder, what did it concern this time? He had brought Sasuke back, hadn't he? Naruto couldn't imagine what Sakura could want now.
"Please save him!" Sakura sobbed. "Turn Sasuke back into the old Sasuke-kun!"
Naruto's eyes widened and he looked at Sakura in complete shock.
"He . . . he's different now. He's so cold! It's like he wants nothing to do with me. Naruto . . ."
Sighing, Naruto looked away. Suddenly he had begun to feel nauseous. As Sakura continued to heartbrokenly tell him how Sasuke had changed, Naruto couldn't bear to look at her anymore. Instead, he gazed into the fireplace and stopped listening. It was true Sasuke had changed—for the worse. He was a lot quieter now, a lot more temperamental. He didn't go out often, and stayed in his apartment for most of the day. When he did venture to go outside, he was stalked by curious villagers, infatuated fangirls, the shinobi who considered him a traitor to the village. But Naruto didn't think it was any of these things that prevented Sasuke from leaving his house. It couldn't be, because Sasuke . . . Sasuke could deal with them. Would deal with them. If only he were feeling up to it.
A hiccup brought his attention back to Sakura. He gazed at her sadly, not knowing what to tell her. Tears still pathetically streamed down her face and her lower lip quivered, even as she bit it seemingly as hard as she could. Naruto sighed again and stood up. He took a step forward and wrapped his arms around his tong-time crush. She shakily hugged him back, and then started crying into his shoulder.
Naruto pursed his lips, and slowly started rubbing soothing circles into Sakura's back. He honestly didn't know what to tell her. He could tell her the truth, which was that he didn't know if he could fix Sasuke. Or he could lie to her and bravely say he would heal Sasuke even if it meant his own life. That was what he had done last time, except maybe he had really believed he could bring Sasuke back. In the end, he had succeeded, but . . . The truth was, Naruto had nearly died doing so.
Another truth: At the end, Naruto hadn't done it in order to keep his promise to Sakura.
And honestly, Naruto did want to help Sasuke. Of course he did! Naruto would do anything for a friend, and that was common knowledge. But did he want to promise Sakura, again? If he did, he would be bound to it. If he promised her and failed, he would forever have to live with the guilt. He could see her face now, disappointed. Tear-stained. Heartbroken.
Naruto shut his eyes, embracing Sakura with more passion.
He'd made the promise last time just because he hated to see Sakura like this. Like that. Naruto had loved her then, and even though it killed him to watch her chase after Sasuke all the time, he had still done it. Even if bringing Sasuke back meant losing all hope of ever Sakura ever returning his love, Naruto still sought to do it; because he's unselfish. Love is selfless, and if forcing the Uchiha to come home would make Sakura happy, then it was the only thing Naruto could do. So Naruto promised. I'll bring him back, Sakura-chan! Dattebayo!With that damn grin plastered to his face, no one would have guessed the turmoil going on inside.
As Naruto pulled away now, there was no fake smile on his lips. No happily closed eyes or painstaking optimism.
Instead, his eyes were serious and, most of all, sad, as Naruto looked down at Sakura.
Placing his hands on her shoulders, he said quietly, "Sakura, I don't know if I can make that promise to you."
She gasped, suddenly glancing up at him as if just realizing he'd been looking at her. Fresh tears had gathered at the edges of her eyes and Sakura stared at him in unaccepting disbelief.
"Why?"
It came in a choked whisper, and seemed to ask many questions at once. Why won't you promise me this? Why can't you promise me?What's the difference between now and before?
The problem was, Sakura didn't see the difference. Though she claimed to recognize how Team Seven had fallen out, and though she said she knew they could never be the same again, Naruto knew Sakura had never really believed that. Deep inside, she carried hope for a fantasy. A fantasy that, unfortunately, never had a chance of becoming reality. Team Seven was never meant for a happy ending; they couldn't remain together if all Sakura wanted was to be with Sasuke. Sasuke couldn't care less for her, and Naruto . . . had always cared too much. It wasn't equal.
And balance beams topple when there's too much on one side, and too little on the other.
"Because it's not possible," he whispered, looking away painfully.
Even as Sakura caught her breath, Naruto continued, "Sasuke never had much hope to begin with. It was always revenge with him. Revenge for his family, revenge for his brother, revenge for his suffering. Maybe if he had never left—no, maybe if I had brought him back in time, he could be a different Sasuke. A happier one. A Sasuke who could learn return your love." There was no bitterness when Naruto said this. Just empty resignation. "But I was too late. He killed his brother. And Sakura, I don't know if you ever thought about this, but he probably had to kill a little bit of himself to do that." He thought about Sasuke—how he considered Sasuke a brother even though they weren't blood-related. "I know . . . if I ever were to kill Sasuke . . . I would die, too."
Naruto looked back at Sakura now, regretfully gazing down at her. "I don't know if I could ever recover from that," he said, more bluntly than he intended. "And so I don't know if I'll be able to make Sasuke recover. I'm not a healer. I'm not a magic-worker. There's only so much I can do."
An expression that was almost understanding now registered on Sakura's face. She lowered her eyes, and her face softened a bit. "Yeah, I . . . understand."
And yet, despite everything he'd just said, Naruto couldn't bear to hear her sound so distant.
"I-I'll try!" he said abruptly, just as quickly removing his hands from Sakura's shoulders and taking a step back. A little desperately, he added, "I'm not making any promises, but . . . but I'll try!"
Immediate anxiety seeped into Naruto's heart, as well as something akin to regret. He probably shouldn't have said that. He shouldn't have given this any hope at all—even giving it a sliver of a chance could drag him into a deep dark hole again and force him to go through with it. Naruto didn't even know if he could do it! Though yes, he wanted to, maybe he shouldn't have promised it. Least of all, promised it to Sakura. Because just like last time, even if she didn't hold it against him, he would hold it against himself. Naruto knew he would feel guilty every time he failed, and knew that the disappointment would consistently be in Sakura's eyes every time that happened.
But upon seeing those green eyes light up and hearing the high-pitched squeal of "Thank you!" ring through the air, Naruto decided it was worth it.
Anything was worth Sakura's happiness.
Anything.
