"I'm a lizard."

"Huh?" She tilted her head to the side in confusion.

"You asked!" He laughed raising his hands in defence. "Now can we just drop it already? I wanna do something fun." He licked his lips and she was momentarily distracted by the azure tongue before she shook her head. She tried to push him off her but it merely made him grin wilder than before. She gave up and stared up into his blazing golden irises.

"But…a lizard?" Orihime pouted. He frowned.

"Well what did ya' want from me? A bunny? I'm sorry I got to keep a little more of my dignity than your batman and his sidekick 'grimmkitty'," The hollow growled. She had to hold her breath so as not to giggle.

"Well, I was thinking you were something different, that's all…" she sighed. What was she gonna do now? There was no way her previous idea would work anymore…

He rolled his eyes and tightened his arms around her making a cage. He lowered himself dangerously close to her face so that their lips were just inches apart. She was so tempted to fill that small gap between his soft, pale, alabaster lips and her own. She stared up into his eyes, pleading. He was only more than willing to fill the gap for her.

His lips slammed roughly against hers but she'd been prepared for that and so she had learned to fight back a little. She entangled her fingers gently with the hair on the back of his head and pulled him closer. He growled in response and kissed her even more fiercely, exploring the depths of her mouth with his tongue, savouring her all while she did the same for him. He pulled away quickly, smirking devilishly, knowing she hadn't wanted him to stop yet. She tried not to let her disappointment show.

"Honestly Hime, I don't know what that form was way back then or how it happened. I don't know about what the King thought but I meant what we said. You're mine and ain't no one allowed to hurt ya' but me," He declared suddenly with a narrow eyed smile. She bit her lip and turned away from his gaze.

He huffed. "You're so stupid."

"Huh? Wha-"She didn't get to finish her sentence however before being claimed up into another kiss. It was so easy to forget everything this way but the problem still remained. Unless…

------------

"Kinky," the hollow mused in appreciation. He was staring up at the display for a maid cosplay thinking to himself all the things he would've liked to do to his Hime while she wore it. Pretty much the same things he did anyway. But it'd be kinkier…

"Do you think it comes in your size? Huh? Hime! Dammit, where'd she go…?"

It was her idea. Honestly, it was. He hadn't even said a word of suggestion. In fact she had simply asked him to come for a walk with her downtown because she wanted to pick something up and before he knew it he was dragged into this…shop.

If he hadn't thought Ichigo knew nothing before, he did now. This place was…well, it could only really be described in a few letters; XXXX. Damn, there were so many new things he wanted to try. With Hime. If he could only find her.

"God dammit! The shop's not that big! Where'd she go? I have ta' ask her somethin'…"

He began to speed up in his pace. What if she'd gotten lost or something? The damn girl could find trouble in a padded sponge room; it wouldn't be unlikely for her to get stuck in some sort of weird situation. Especially in a place like this. Oh shit. What if someone…?

He ran down to the end of the aisle and spun quickly around the corner and called out her name harshly. No. No. No. No. No. Not his girl. Not his damn princess. He'd tear their throats out before they could do anything to her. He would make sure they felt so much pain they begged for death. He'd kill everyone here if he had to. Make sure there were no witnesses of course.

He'd show them his real face. Make them drown in their own fear. Bastards would learn; no one touches his Hime. He slid to a stop and glanced feverously around him.

"Hime!!!"

"Shiro-kun is that you?" A voice sounded, incredibly nearby. He whipped his head towards the direction of the voice and found himself face to face with a dressing room door.

"Hime!?"

"Ah! Um, one second Shiro-kun! I want to-umph- show you something!" She called from behind the door. Several bumps and crashes were heard.

"…Uh…Hime…?" More crashes. He stood there nervously, digging his black nails deep into the back of his skull, trying to calm down. He considered breaking the door down just to see if she was alright when a sickening crack shot past his eardrums.

"That's it! Outa the-" Click.

"…way?"

"Ta-da! Do you like it?" She stumbled out of the dressing room smiling warmly and did a sort of half spin in front of him. He stared. She giggled.

"………You……I can't believe…you…the last shred of my dignity…crushed…"

"What!? Waaaahhh! I'm sorry! Does Shiro-kun want a hug? I'm so sorry! I-"

"No. The only thing I want right now, Hime, is for you to take off that pink dinosaur costume…and for us to never leave your house again. Now excuse me…"

And from that day on the hollow had forever been cursed with an irrational fear of "costume" shops. And the colour pink.


Something I made a little while back, I hope it made people laugh. :) Review please!