Preface

I sit out in the rain, the cold washing away my pain.

There is no place for me in this world…

So I die alone, without you by my side.

Those words echo in my mind. A silly set of words from the last song I had listened to before tonight. I was laying in the rain, blood running into a puddle around me. Johnny stands looking down at me with his beautiful blue eyes.

"You left me no choice, Blue. I loved you, but you did it. You let them come after me."

I closed my eyes to not look at his face anymore. I loved him. I would never do that to him. My brother did it all. He hated that I choose a man who was considered homicidal, but Johnny was not like that. He was something more.

I rose my hand up to his bloody face. "Mac did this. He doesn't want me to love you." I choked on the last of the words. "I love you, Johnny. Never forget that."

I closed my eyes one last time.

Chapter 1

Two months earlier…

I felt the sun shining on my face as I opened the door to the Memphis Mental Health Institute. I look down at my new nurse shirt. It was going to a long day for me. Dr. Jacobson greeted me as he was leaving for his lunch break. I waved back at him and headed straight for my list of patients I was going to attend for the day. The first on the list was a man named Johnny. He looked rather interesting to say the least.

I brushed a loose strand of black hair behind my ear. "Homicidal, huh?"

I cocked an eyebrow at his picture. Nurse Rachel looked to me and nodded.

"He's a tough one. Dealt with settling him in earlier today. Have fun."

I smiled to myself. Fun indeed. His dark nature showed through his description. I liked that. I placed the document on the table in front of me.

"I'll go see how our friend is doing!" I said in a singsong voice.

The hallway seemed longer than it usually was. I guess it was my nerves racking up inside me. I really wanted to know more about Johnny. Outside his door, I peeked into his room. He sat huddled in a corner, staring off into space. I knocked. He turned to look at the door.

"May I come in, Johnny?" I asked, not sure if he was a threat.

"Sure."

I could barely hear him, but that did not matter. I opened the door and there he sat in his white patient clothes. From head to toe, he looked pale and thin. He had short black hair that hung slightly against his forehead, while the back was shaved off. He had amazing blue eyes that seemed to illuminate his features. In all, he was handsome. That is what caught my attention the most.

"Hello, Johnny. I am Blue. For now, I will be your nurse. Is there anything you need? Water? Food?" I asked, trying to pick up a conversation.

Johnny stared at me with dark eyes. I knew this was going to start badly.

"Is there anything I can help you with? Are you comfortable?" He still sat there. I sighed. "There is going to be no use talking to you, is there?"

"I only let you in because you would have come in either way."

"I am not that kind of person. I would rather work on your own terms. I only want to talk. Is that bad?"

He shook his head. At least he finally started talking.

"So, what do you want to talk about?"

"How about…how you came to be here? You seem so smart, and young. Why would they call you homicidal?"

"I am not what people think. You people do not know me."

"I want to get to know you, that way I can make you as comfortable as possible and help set you on the right path? Does that sound like a good deal?"

Johnny looked at the padded wall in front of him, his eyes distant from everything around him. "Yeah. I guess you could understand."

I continued to watch him for a few minutes more before I moved in closer to him. I knew it was not safe to move so close to someone who was listed as homicidal, but I wanted to prove to him that he was different.

"Johnny," I said, "what can I do for you?"

"I do not want to be here."

"Why not? Is there nothing wrong with you?"

I caught a smirk on his perfect chiseled lips. I blushed. "Tell me more about yourself, Johnny?"

Chapter 2

I could not believe that I had gotten Johnny to talk. All the doctors were angry with me for going to talk to him without a guard, but they were mainly surprised that I had gotten him to talk. He was so quiet with everyone else. Dr. Jacobson told me that I was to be with him when he wanted to talk to him.

They would never know my secret though: I liked Johnny. He was sweet under that cold stare he gave everyone.

I laid down on my bed looking over the piles of information Dr. Jacobson gave me to research on Johnny. I had to know as much about him as I could the next day, so we could begin to evaluate him. I really did not want to upset Johnny, but there was nothing I could do.

I focused in on Johnny's history. There were many different complaints that he killed people; that he got annoyed easily and took it out on people.

I could not believe it. Johnny did not act that way.

There were nothing about his interests in the profiles of him. I would have to delve deeper into his mind tomorrow…

I yawned at my last thought of him; his blue eyes looking into mine as he told me to what he could not stand: annoying people.

ΩΩΩ

The next morning, my phone buzzed to life. If was Dr. Jacobson's number. Why would he call me so early? I answered the phone to be surprised to hear the voice I never thought I would hear.

"Are you there?"

Johnny's voice sounded rich. My heart stopped.

"Y-yes. I'm here," I responded.

"Get down here. We need to talk."

The phone hung up. I was surprised. Johnny really wanted to talk to me.

I threw back the covers and grabbed a stash of work clothes. Applying makeup in the car, I drove as fast as I could to the hospital. Every second seemed distant as I pulled into the parking lot.

Entering the hospital, I did not even bother to signing in. Johnny was the only important thing to me now. I threw open his patient room. Johnny sat there with Dr. Jacobson yelling at him fiercely.

"Johnathon! You must abide by the rules!"

Johnny looked extremely angry, as he glared directly Dr. Jacobson.

"Johnathon!" he yelled again.

"Dr. Jacobson, I'm here."

He looked at me. "Oh. I did not see you there. Please explain to him to abide by the rules."

I looked at Johnny. He glanced at me. I felt my heart thud against my ribcage.

"Hi…" I said shyly. My cheeks felt like they were on fire.

"Blue…" he said.

My name sounded so perfect coming from his lips.

"Is everything alright? Has anyone upset you?"

"Just get this man from my sight. Before I kill him."

"Why, Johnny? I know you're better than that."

He stared at me, his blue eyes glowing from under his messy black hair.

"He just annoys me. I can't stand people who annoy me!"

We stared at each other for a few minutes before I ushered Dr. Jacobson out the door. I shut the door firmly behind me.

"We can talk in peace now," I said to him, as I turned around.

Johnny was standing. I could see that he was tall—about three inches taller than I was. He got up close to me. As far apart as we were, I could smell him. He smelled directly of sweat. My heart slammed against my ribcage. I could tell that my cheeks were blaring a bright red. Johnny lifted his hand up to my cheek and brushed a strand of my black hair off my face.

"Don't be frightened of me. I would never harm you."

Those words sounded like a fairytale to me. I know I like him, but there was no way he would like me. We came from two different worlds.

"I'm not afraid of you," I say.

I reach up to touch his hand that stayed resting on my face. I desired to reach up and kiss his perfect lips. He looked so perfect standing here in front of me.

However, he made the first move. His lips pressed into my forehead.

"At least you listen to me."

I blushed.

Chapter 3

I sat next to Johnny, his pale hand touching mine. I laid my head on his shoulder. Together we watched a movie I had managed to sneak in. At least it would give him something to do, instead of boring himself to death every day.

"So, Johnny…what do you think?"

He glanced at me. "You could have picked something better than this!"

"But this is a classic. I cannot let you watch anything with blood. Dr. Jacobson won't allow it."

His face had stayed the same whenever we hung out now. I liked him, but he showed no emotions toward anything. I pushed myself closer to him.

"You want to do something else?"

Johnny swiveled his had to look at me. "Just get me out of this room."

"I can't do that, Johnny. You have to cooperate with the doctors and show improvement, and who knows how long that could be."

He glared straight at me. "Johnny, I want to help you. If you have to…lie."

I could not believe I just said that. Did I just tell Johnny to lie?

He smirked at me. "I never knew you had a dark side…"

"I—I usually never do this…I don't know what has gotten into me."

Johnny brought up his hands to cup my face. "You gave me a great idea." A wicked grin spread across his lips.

"Pl—please, Johnny. Don't do anything to hurt yourself…"

"You under estimate me."

I watched him stand up. As tall as he was, I still felt small.

"Johnny, please. What are you going to do?"

"Exactly as you said. Lie! Why not? Shouldn't they want to hear what I have to say?" He pressed his fingers to my lips. "They'll believe whatever I want them to believe."

Chapter 4

A knock at my door that night startled me. I groggily answered to see Pepito staring at me with his red demon eyes. My heart beat out of control. It had been over two years since we laid eyes on each other.

"Hola, mi preciosa," he spoke.

"Pito?" I asked. "Why are you here?"

"He oído que se acercaban a alguien que está mal."

I cocked my head. "You should know that I don't speak Spanish."

He took a strand of my black hair in between his fingers. "Todavía hay tiempo para aprender, mi amor."

"Speak English, you half-demon pint!" I snapped. It was bad enough when Johnny spoke of ridiculous things.

"Feisty como siempre. Tome su escudo hacia abajo y me voy a considerar."

"Feisty? Consider? Pepito, I demand you speak English at once, or I close this door!"

"Fine, bonito."

All this annoying talk with a demon was going to get me nowhere, including taking away from my precious sleep. I leaned in close to Pepito. "Get off my lawn or speak English."

He smirked his famous toothy grin at me. "As you wish."

"What do you want?"

"Who are you babysitting?"

"No one."

"You know my Dad knows."

"He's no one. All I'm doing is helping him."

Pepito looked me over. His red eyes glowed through me.

"Come on in."

"Squee wants to see you."

"Is that all?"

"He's wanted to see you. You did say that you would read some of his escritos."

I smirked at him, totally lost, and confused with his Spanish language. "Why do you persist when I don't speak Spanish?"

"You're my flor picante."

I threw my hands up in the air and walked away. Pepito was never going to change. Over on the counter popped up a cold can of Poop. Pepito was gliding over to me by hovering five inches off the ground. His flying ability was always annoying.

"Flor picante, ¿qué pasa?" he asked.

I looked to him from out of the corner of my eye. "We haven't seen each other in two years and the first thing you do is try digging into my social life?"

"Me preocupo por ti. Squee sólo quiere verte. ¿Eso es malo?"

I screamed out in frustration. "I don't know what you're talking about! Why must everything be in Spanish?"

Pepito chuckled.

"I like seeing you squirm. It's adorable."

"I meet with Squee. Just let me get my journal."

I pulled away from Pepito as he opened the can of Poop. I ran up the stairs trying hard to ignore him. In my room, I found my journal. I flipped it open to the last entry to see a small sketch of Johnny. He looked all warn out from the interrogation Dr. Jacobson was putting him through. I felt so bad at the time that I could not even look at Johnny to talk to him; all I could do was sit there and make this small sketch. I stuffed the journal into my small skull purse and spun around to see Pepito leaning against the doorframe.

"Pepito!" I shrieked at him.

"You've decorated since we last saw each other. More skulls and spider webs, too. Nice touch."

I smacked past his shoulder. I knew that Squee was outside.

ΩΩΩ

Outside was Squee. He sat in Pepito's black hearse.

"Hey, Squee!" I called.

"Squee!"

He looked at me with adorable brown eyes hiding under his unkempt brown hair.

"Pito told me to come see you."

He looked at his lap. "I don't know why he would do this. He just always pushes into my business."

I leaned forward to touch Squee's cheek. "He's just an idiot. Trust me. When he speaks Spanish and I don't know what's he's talking about, it make the conversation that much harder."

Squee looked up at me. "I want to know why you to broke up, if that's okay?"

"Sure it is, sweetheart," I said, ruffling up his hair. "Pito just wasn't my type after a while. He is hot, but I do not get along with Mexicans all that well. Come on inside."

I talked with Squee as we walked up to my house. He seemed more distant than usual today. Before long, he asked to see my writings. I pulled out my journal.

"There's nothing really in there, but journal entries. I try not to let them get too boring or we wouldn't have a good journal, now would we."

Pepito was standing out on the porch with his hands behind his head. His purple, forked tongue ran across his lip piercing, making a smacking noise as it trailed over the rest of the tongue.

"Give her yours. My mom wants you over for dinner tonight."

Squee nodded and looked to me, his brown eyes lighting up at the mention of 'over for dinner tonight'. I could only guess that Squee liked Pepito.

"H-here," he said, handing me his blue notebook. "There's not much in there, except poems and short stories."

"It doesn't matter. I should have these read in a week."

"I guess I'll be seeing you."

"We should hang out more."

Before Squee could respond to me, Pepito was dragging him to the car. It was sad to see them go, but I didn't mind as I had Johnny to deal with."

This is the Spanish translation. Sorry if some of the translation looks bad. I suck at translating and my translator can't translate worth crap.

Hola, mi preciosa = Hello, my precious

He oído que se acercaban a alguien que está mal= I heard someone approaching is wrong

Todavía hay tiempo para aprender, mi amor= There is still time to learn, my love

Feisty como siempre. Tome su escudo hacia abajo y me voy a considerar= Feisty as ever. Take his shield down and I'll consider

Escritos= writings

Flor picante, ¿qué pasa?= Flower spicy, what happens?

Me preocupo por ti. Squee sólo quiere verte. ¿Eso es malo?= I care about you. Squee only wants to see you. Is that bad?

Chapter 5

I looked at Johnny as he sat with his arms folded across his chest. The day started well, until Dr. Jacobson had to butt-in and say, "All he does is talk about killing someone. This kid's wacky." I could see the tension in Johnny's eyes. He could not stand this talk anymore, but I was determined to get him to speak; even if it meant going to the extreme.

"Johnny, I get that you don't like him, but can we focus on the important stuff here?"

Johnny still sat there in his glaring, comatose-like state. I wanted to shake him for all that he was worth.

"I think he needs a break, Dr. Jacobson. Maybe you should not be in here when I am talking to him. He may open up a bit more."

"No. Absolutely not. Who knows what's going on his mind."

I patted Dr. Jacobson on the shoulder. "Look at him. You're the reason he is not happy." I glanced back over to Johnny. "Besides, he looks exhausted."

"He doesn't sleep. Refuses to eat. How can we help him?"

Johnny looked to me for the first time in the past hour. "I will talk to you alone, Blue."

Dr. Jacobson slammed his meaty fist onto the table. "She will not! You may be the patient, but I am the doctor! What I say goes. Got it?"

Johnny's eyes snapped onto the doctor. "Look here! I do what I want. No mind-altering, fake healer is going to touch me. You and your sick practices annoy me. But wacky? I can show you wacky!"

He shot up from his chair, tackled the doctor, and stabbed him with the pen he swiped from me. The pen slipped into Dr. Jacobson's right eye. Blood gushed everywhere. The doors slammed open and five guards came rushing in to grab Johnny, each with their own taser. As four of the guards held Johnny down, the final guard came up to him with a shot in his hand. The injection went over smoothly until I caught the look on Johnny's face. He was staring straight at me. I shook my head trying to avoid making anymore eye contact.

The guards slung him over their shoulder as they carried him out of the room.

"Get me an ambulance!" Dr. Jacobson hollered.

I looked over at him. "See what you did now. Johnny was fine until you had to go and threaten him."

I stormed out past him and rushed for Johnny's room. Not too far down the hallway, I saw Johnny being thrown into his room. The guards glanced at me.

"Miss, I would avoid being near him without a few guards with you."

"Johnny was doing well until he was attacked."

"It seemed he was doing the attacking."

"It was verbal for him. It seems he hates being called names."

Vaughn, one of the bigger guards that held Johnny down, stepped forward. "I've seen this boy on my street. Danger and death seem to follow him around."

"Johnny's never once come to threaten me. Now, if you don't mind, I'm going to check on him."

All the guards blocked my path.

"Trust us. You don't want to get involved with someone like him."

"I already have."

None of them moved. I sighed. I could try again later, anyway.