Ad Hoc Minutes – Holiday in the Sun
Rated PG-13
Disclaimer: I own nothing except a desire to save SV Clark.
S8 SPOILERS!! Do not read further if you're not into spoilers.
So there won't be any confusion. These are the Players:
NNLois is Noel Neill's Lois Lane in the Adventures of Superman television series
GRClark is George Reeves' Clark Kent in the Adventures of Superman television series
MKLois is Margot Kidder's Lois Lane in the Superman movies
CRClark is Christopher Reeve's Clark Kent in the Superman movies
THLois is Terri Hatcher's Lois Lane in the New Adventures of Lois and Clark tv series
DCClark is Dean Cain's Clark Kent in the New Adventures of Lois and Clark tv series
EDLois is Erica Durance's Lois Lane in the Smallville tv series
TWClark is Tom Welling's Clark Kent in the Smallville tv series
"Ladies, welcome to Crater Lake. Courtesy of Clark," smiled EDLois as she spread out a blanket on the sand. All three of her companions chuckled setting down various bags and beach paraphernalia.
"You're not supposed to know that," sing-songed THLois with a wink.
ED rolled her eyes in true Lois fashion. "Yea, well, there's a lot of that. I'm just glad I missed the whole growing up in a meteor freak town."
"Smallville was a lot more wholesome in our day," said MKLois as she opened a beach chair.
"Yea, just farmers and watching the corn grow," quipped TH as she spread out a beach towel.
"So is there kryptonite at the bottom of the lake?" asked NNLois, who never missed an opportunity for a good investigative story.
Everyone stopped what they were doing and gaped at one another.
"Y'know, I don't think so. But that's a great question. It had to be one big rock from Krypton to form this lake," answered ED. "But Clark's swam here before and he never was affected."
All the others let out a sigh of relief as they started to get comfortable in the Kansas sun. ED had found a secluded area for them all to visit uninterrupted.
NNLois removed her swimwear jacket to reveal a black one piece bathing suit.
TH nudged MK and whispered. "She's still got the killer bod."
"That's just one of the great things about being Lois," grinned MK.
"So when are you-know-who getting here?" asked NN with her hand shielding her eyes from the bright sun.
Sunglassed TH and MK gazed up into the sky. "I don't know for sure. They're never late without good reason so I guess it doesn't matter," said TH.
Everyone was lying in the sun and enjoying its warmth. MK, TH, and ED sported bikinis that would seduce a super man.
Speaking to no one in particular. "Does anyone know if Clark gets sunburned?" asked ED as she applied some lotion to her skin.
"Solar batteries don't tan," mumbled MK sounding as if she was about to take a nap.
ED 's eyebrows met in the middle of her forehead. "What does that mean?"
TH propped herself on an elbow while addressing her fellow Lois' question. "Kryptonians absorb energy from the yellow sun like a solar battery. It's what gives them their strength and abilities. It might even make them immortal."
"Oh, I've never liked that theory!" said MK lounging in her beach chair. "It always makes me think of Wonder Woman waiting in the wings to snatch him up after we die."
"The hell you say," said NN sounding very irritated by the idea.
"There's always Maxima," offered TH.
"I guess we'll find out soon enough," sighed ED.
Three heads turned in her direction with very puzzled expressions.
Suddenly a subtle sound was heard overhead. With her eyes still closed, NN spoke. "Here they come."
TH rose up on the blanket. "Yea, all four of them."
"What?" said ED startled by what she saw.
"Looks like Junior is a quick learner," chuckled MK.
"He's not supposed to be doing that," said EDLois shaking her head with a grin.
Three red capes and one red jacket landed in a whisper on the sand.
"ED, turn your head away! It's the spin!" shouted NN as all the other Lois' did the same.
ED felt sand hitting her back and then all was quiet.
"Clark! A warning?" said TH as she approached him with a kiss on DCClark's cheek.
."Sorry, honey. I forgot." DC grinned as he gave her a hug.
"You always forget," whispered MKLois as she looked into CRClark's eyes and he gave her a kiss on the lips.
"It's just that I get so excited seeing you again," said GRClark as NN let him brush the sand off her.
ED observed her three friends standing next to their men who were now wearing t-shirts, swim trunks, sandals, and glasses. Well at least they lost the socks.
Her guy stood there looking like a dorky farm boy. TWClark was still fully dressed right down to the boots.
"Swim trunks?" said EDLois with an eyebrow raised.
"Under the jeans," TWClark grinned.
"What else you got under the jeans?" she asked seductively.
TW looked around and blushed. "Lo-is."
"Clark." She invaded his personal space and put her arms around his waist. "Junior."
"Is that a question?" he chuckled.
"No, that's their new nickname for you," she said nodding at the three couples who were blatantly spying on their every move. "And what's with the flying?"
"I. . .I wasn't flying. . .exactly. I took a big leap," he stammered.
She gave him a knowing look. "Yea, uh huh. Sure."
His smile lit up the entire planet. "That's my story and I'm sticking to it."
"Yea, it's a story alright," she smirked.
"Call me a Kryptonian," said CRClark as he stood beside TW. "But there's something different about the two of you."
"Spill it, ED," said MK as she gave her a good natured glare.
"Wel-ll," started ED.
"I'm going to be working at the Daily Planet this year," interrupted a very happy TWClark.
"Oooo that sounds VERY promising," cooed THLois with DC's arm around her.
"You're going to have so much fun," chuckled DCClark.
"So you'll be doing your own thinking this year?" asked GRClark grinning from ear to ear.
"I've always loved a thinking man," said NN as she gazed up at GRClark.
"Me too," said ED quietly. TW exchanged a loving glance her way.
"And flying doesn't hurt either," kidded MK.
"He's always known how to fly," said CR hugging his Lois close.
"Really?" said ED trying to find the answer in TW's face.
"The kid's a natural," said GR while walking towards the water with NN.
"So this year . . ."
"Yea, it looks like it," smiled TWClark nodding.
His Lois jumped up and down. "Yes! Yes! Yes! " He grabbed her and gave her a hug while he smelled her hair.
"Watch out for the store room!" shouted GR from the shore as NN dove into the water. He followed her in. For a few seconds there was only the rippling of the surface. Then bursting forth into the air, GR had NN in his arms and was threatening to drop her. She laughed exuberantly.
TW turned to EDLois and grinned. "You've already been in the store room."
She promptly put her hands on her hips and gave him a stubborn look. "That wasn't my idea. Besides, a guy was murdered in there right in front of me. It's not exactly a fond memory."
She watched him get that gleam in his eye. The one she was beginning to recognize and appreciate. "Maybe we could do something about that. Make a memory or two of our own in there this season."
"Watch it, TW, we might have to call out the freeze breath. You two will melt the tv screen if they let you do that on the show!" chuckled TH as DC and CR nodded to each other.
Without warning EDLois found herself enveloped in TWClark's arms shielding her from the icy cold breath of his two friends. Even with her words muffled by Clark's chest, DC, CR, and GR could still hear her. "Knock it off! Clark's already been a popsicle on the show!"
"Always defending me, huh?" he grinned at her.
"She's a Lois," laughed MK at her Clark's antics.
"Okay, something major has happened. What is it?" asked CRClark as he walked towards the blanket on the sand.
"Wel-ll . . ." started TW looking as if he wanted to stall as long as possible.
"Smallville," said ED quickly.
"What?"
"You're at the beach. Strip!" she said with a smirk.
"Oh yea," he said with his goofy grin as he turned into a blur before her eyes. When his image cleared, he was dressed in his blue trunks with the red and white stripes . . . and no t-shirt. All his clothes were perfectly folded in a pile at his barefeet.
She couldn't contain the little sigh that escaped her lips as she watched his muscles ripple under his skin. "You know that neatness thing will probably drive me nuts."
"It does!" said MK and TH in unison while NN and GR returned to the shore to sit with them.
"CR, did you ever get an answer to your question?" said DC with his arms folded.
"Why no, DC," he answered smiling and imitating his stance. "I'm still waiting. Y'know for a guy with superspeed he . . .."
"Hey, I got distracted. Lois told me to strip . . . again."
"Again?" said MK, TH, and NN in surprise.
"It was an alternate universe," explained ED. "It's not like he let me watch . . ."
"They never do," said MK rolling her eyes.
"Well, not before the wedding . . ." giggled TH.
MK and NN shook their heads as EDLois smirked. She wasn't about to point out that her Clark just stripped in front of her even if it was at superspeed.
"So what happened?" asked GR as he laid beside NN digging into a bag of chips.
ED turned to TW. "Do you want to tell them?" TW furrowed his brow and gave her his pleading look. "Okay, I'll do it." She turned to a very expectant audience. "Lana left."
MK grabbed CR's hand. "There is a God!"
TH looked like a fish gasping for breath. "Really?"
"How did that happen?" asked DC.
"Nice work, kid," grinned NN as GR handed her a soda.
EDLois blushed as TWClark moved his toes through the sand. "She, uh, . . . left Clark a goodbye DVD."
"Tack-ky!!" said MK rolling her eyes while TH gawfed.
"Didn't she do that before with some other guy?" asked NN while GR put lotion on her back.
"That was video tape," said ED.
"Ooooo, big difference!" said TH as DC tried not to laugh.
"I guess history repeats itself," CR surmised.
"Yea," said EDLois taking TW's hand. "We got a hug out of it," she said as he put his hand over hers.
"She was there for me," said TW gazing at her face.
"I think I'm going to cry," sniffed TH.
"You already are," said NN as she handed her a towel. "Here."
"The kids are growing into us," said MK incredulous. "Finally!"
"Yea, it looks that way," said ED as TWClark gave her a hug.
"But . . .the Fortress is destroyed and I'm missing in action. Lex supposedly knows my secret or maybe not," said TW as he sat on a beach towel.
"The Fortress destroyed?" said CR with a pained look.
"That sucks," said DC in sympathy. "Where are you going to go to collect your thoughts?"
"Not that damned loft!" said EDLois immediately.
TW chuckled. "Maybe I'll find some place in Metropolis."
"The top of the Daily Planet is great for that," smirked CR as MK nodded encouragingly.
"We've been there before," said TW as ED grinned from ear to ear.
"So is Mr. White going to be there this year?" asked NN as she rubbed lotion on GRClark.
"We're not sure yet," said ED as she watched them. "I thought you said Clark didn't tan."
"I don't," grinned GR wiggling his eyebrows as he enjoyed NN's ministrations.
NN was giving her the "duh" signal.
"Oh, sorry. Carry on," said ED a little flustered. "I forgot that you two couldn't . . .y'know. Silver Age and all that . . . I . . "
"Lois," said TW.
"What?"
"Relax."
"Okay," she said and promptly sat on a beach towel beside him.
"I love it when they do that," said CRClark.
"Yea," said DC. "Let some other guy try that and they're gnashing their teeth and going for the jugular."
"That's how we know it's the real thing. Lois is totally female when she's with us. She's her true self and she trusts us to know her best," said GR looking very peaceful and very much in love.
TWClark gave his Lois a sidewards glance. "Yea, it's true. EDLois is Lois and I'm Clark and together we're iconic. Nothing can tear us apart. No matter how hard they try."
"Men of Steel and Women of Integrity. Powerful stuff," whispered CR.
"I think they like us," said MK lying on the blanket beside her guy.
"They do have Kryptonian brains. That makes them smarter," said TH matter-of-factly.
"And they have huge hearts. That's always appealing," said NN as she let the sun warm her body.
"Oh, you know it's that whole Boy Scout thing that gets to us the most. Small town boy from another planet meets world weary city girl with Chutzpah. That's a super combination," smirked ED beneath her shades.
There was a silent moment. Not uncomfortable, as everyone thought about the seventy year history.
"So a little bird told me that the Green Arrow was coming back," said DC as he trailed a finger along TH's arm.
"He's been talking to the Black Canary?" said ED to her Clark, who shrugged.
"Oliver will be back and Dinah, too," answered TW.
"So Ollie and Lois . . ." started TH.
"Oh no! That's not happening again. It should have stayed broken up the first time," said EDLois.
"We got a hug out of it," said TW and he drew her closer to him.
"Will you be wearing the . . . " CRClark searched for a word. "uniform this year?"
"Without a codpiece," added MKLois as she ran her hand down CR's back.
"I won't be wearing the . . .uniform," said TWClark as he watched EDLois provocatively brush sand from her legs. "With or without a codpiece."
"So no big red S for you?" pouted THLois.
"I do admit I'd like to see that," sighed EDLois.
"Well maybe the S but not the . . .y'know," he said looking at his own legs. "Besides, you wouldn't see it anyway. You're not supposed to know . . ."
"Oh for heaven sakes! How stupid do they think we are? We're investigative reporters. We have observation skills," said MKLois.
"Besides, just because she acts like she doesn't remember things that happened right in front of her, it doesn't mean she doesn't know about them," said NN taking off GR's glasses and smiling at him. "Maybe she's just waiting for you to feel comfortable enough to share your secret with her."
"And this from the Silver Age Lois," said ED out of the side of her mouth to TW.
"Lois! Do you mean to tell me you knew all along?" said CRClark holding her in his arms.
"Well, first there's suspicion and of course we have to gather evidence. . . " started MK.
"But what it really boils down to is that we want you to trust us enough to tell us on your own," said TH as she fogged up DC's glasses with her sultry breath.
"Maybe I'll tell you sooner than later. I have to learn something from all the other Clarks' experiences," professed TW. "I do trust you more than any other girl on the show – and you never bug me about it even though you do have something to remember."
ED hugged him. "I see your Kryptonian brain has kicked into gear. Does that mean you'll be doing your own research and investigating?"
"Oh yea. With you. Like in season 4."
Her large smile said it all.
"So what about other powers this season?" asked GR. "In my day, I was capable of blowing out a star."
"Damn!" said EDLois as she gazed at her Clark. "You can do that?"
"I . . I don't know. I barely have superbreath and no freezing breath yet. Not to mention macrovision, telescopic vision, and microvision. I'm just now getting into journalism as a profession. And why I don't have an interest in science, I do not know. Aren't I supposed to be looking for a cure for cancer or something? I've got the brains for it, right?"
"Yes, you do, but you've been letting other people do your thinking for you. . . "
"Well no more. This year I start using my Kryptonian brain on my own. This year I become a man."
EDLois put her arms around his neck. "Checked your drivers license, did ya?"
He smiled and nodded.
"So are they going to let you and Lois get closer this year?" asked TH as she snuggled closer to DC.
"It sounds like it. I guess they are going to start eliminating all the other relationships in my life," said TW as put a strand of hair behind ED's ear.
"Well, SVLana is gone . . ." started MKLois.
"She'll be back," said EDLois quickly.
"Who is she, The Terminator?" quipped TH.
"Probably more like the terminated," said TWClark to no one in particular.
"Ooooooo," said NN. "Sounds like Clark has his brains and his heart well intact."
"I said that aloud, huh?" TW said to his Lois.
She chuckled. "Yea, you did."
"In my day, I did super ventriloquism . . . maybe you should be learning that?" said GR. "Then nobody would know who said what." He beamed.
"So it'll be smooth sailing for you and Lois this year?" chuckled NN.
"Wel-ll not exactly. Remember when we had the slumber party and I went off about them bringing on all the women Clark ever looked at?"
Three investigative reporters' heads turned in her direction. "Maxima?"
EDLois nodded. "I really should learn to keep my mouth shut."
"Not possible," said MKLois as CRClark snickered. "You're a Lois."
"Who's Maxima?" said TWClark a little sheepishly.
Just before any Lois could answer, DC stood up. "I think he better hear this from a Clark." CR and GR nodded. "Maxima is an extraterrestrial being who is Queen of her world and she's looking for a suitable . . . mate. You being a Kryptonian and all puts you at the top of her list."
TW turned to EDLois and sighed. "I guess we're going to have to put up with the Anyone-but-Lois show for a bit more. I'm sorry."
"What do you have to be sorry about? You don't write the show," said ED as she took his hand. "Besides if she's only in one episode early in the season, then you're not going to accept her . . .are you?"
"NO! No way! I'm really tired of all the damn drama. I want to start pursuing you. That has a much greater appeal to me," said TW in true Clark fashion.
"Speaking of mating . . ." said TH. "Next Ad Hoc meeting can we talk about sex and children?"
"Whoa!" said DC. "What's this all about? The SV's can't have kids. They're not even dating yet."
"I know that," started TH.
"I'm not having kids until after I'm married," said EDLois.
NN whispered to GR. "That just proves SRLois isn't a real Lois."
"Well, you might not be able to have children anyway," said CR sadly.
"What?" said TW and ED in unison.
GR stood up and cleared his throat. "Next meeting we discuss sex and children. Now let's enjoy this beautiful day with each other. The SV's seem to have a bright future this season, but if there are major bumps along the way, you know that we're here for you."
"Thanks, GR. Everyone," said TWClark. "We really appreciate all your help. It gives us hope."
All the Clarks grinned as they lifted their Lois' into their arms and headed for the water. Four very feminine squeals could be heard in the cove. "Clark!"