Free Food

(by Sailor Taichichi Vegeta)

This actually happened QUITE a while ago, but I just found the file and decided to finish it. I hope it amuses you as much as the newsflash did me.

Disclaimer

Hey, hey, Mama, more hot cider!

Hey, hey, Papa, hey, hey, Papa!

I can't forget the taste of that grilled cheese-and-bacon sandwich that nobody wanted to share with me!

Draw a circle, that's the Earth,

Draw a circle, that's the Earth,

Draw a circle, that's the Earth,

I'm not Himaruya and therefore own nothing!

Ding-dong!

"West! I'm home!"

"Brother? What happened to you? You've been gone since 6 yeste…"

"Nice to see you too, West."

"…"

"Want some snacks? Got some good beer here too…"

"…Brother… where are your clothes?"

"I left 'em here."

"Why?"

"Because naked shoppers didn't have to pay for their stuff! Kesesesesese!"

"So you went out in public, bought groceries–"

"Received free groceries, West. There's an important difference."

"–fine, received free groceries –then came home again, and you weren't wearing a thing the entire time?"

"That's right!"

"I wish you wouldn't smile so proudly about that…"

"Ah, you're just mad 'cuz you didn't go."

Ding-dong!

"Wait, at least put on some–"

"Hallo?"

"Hey, Prussia!"

"Denmark! I thought I saw you!"

"Everybody saw you! Check out this video! …wait, it's loading… oh, hey Germany."

"…hallo, Denmark."

"Sometimes this lousy thing won't cooperate –got it! Look at this!"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"Awesome! I'm on the news!"

"I already sent it to half of Europe!"

"Kesesesesese! Wanna drink?"

"Why not, I'm already here!"

"You heard the man, West. It's snack time! To the kitchen!"

"…well, at least it can't get any–"

Ding-dong!

"Denmark! No–"

"Veh~ Hi, everybody! Guess where I went today?"

A grocery store in Germany said they'd give free food to the first 100 shoppers who came in with no clothes. They didn't think anyone would go for it, but were inundated with hundreds of naked people. Some of them even camped out the previous night…

Even better: They mostly stayed in the booze aisle.

Best: It's on the Danish border.