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Chapter 1

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Entry 1

Sometimes I feel I have to run away, I have to get away, from the things he's shown me. At this point I don't know whether or not to trust him, love him, or otherwise.

I watch him hurt people everyday and show a great kindness. I know he's hiding something, and I have to find out what it is! I evaluate him every Tuesday, but he only seems to ramble words that seem to kinda make sense, but they don't. I keep watching our videos but nothing at this point in time is making sense. We've only had three sessions so far and he's already left me a "present" on my desk along with a video that makes almost no sense to me. I just feel bad watching it to because the present on my desk was a guard... a dead guard. I just wonder how he managed to get out of his cell, he's in high security to, which even further makes no sense.

I'm really stressed because they are thinking about laying me off from work at Arkham because they don't have the funds right now, and it also sucks because Guy proposed to me not to long ago, we haven't officially set a date yet, but we are thinking to have it here in a few months. I just don't know at this point, with him escaping out of his and what have you.

No official diagnosis has been set for patient #4479, other than the fact he kills for a strange self pleasure. The only things he might fit into is manic depressed, or paranoid schizophrenic. He doesn't always tell you the truth, but he doesn't necessarily lie either. If he wants to tell you something he elaborates it into a sarcastic story.

I feel he has makes his life known though his tall tales, for example his scar stories, or the one he recently told me in one of our sessions. He talked about how we went bear hunting in the Gotham City Zoo and that he wasn't really in a zoo but he was really in a theme park were he killed a man who was in a bear suit and he took him to his "lodge" and skinned him, and then right after someone came in and said the that D.A. had been skinned and left in Dr. Arkham's office.

Could the "lodge" he's referring to be Arkham Asylum? So many questions are running through my mind as I try to figure out this character. I really want to help him, and it would look good if I was able to. He's just too hard to figure out.

Though I wish a lot of times we had his real identity so I was able to just look up his files. If I did have his files I would be able to look back at family records to see if this strange behavior is because of family issues, mental issues, or maybe a former family member who has suffered from something similar.

I really wish I could answer even more questions about him, like why he thinks the way he does?

I don't understand how someone who you can have a somewhat civil conversation with be a homicidal maniac. He gives me the chills though, especially when he flirts with me. What's weird is that I enjoy, yet it really creeps me out. I think I enjoy because I know he's trying to be nice, but he tends to seem hostile while doing it. Quote:

"You have nice eyes. I mean I wouldn't want to pull them out of a skull and carry them around on a key-chain... That's a compliment"

I tried to seem flattered, but it freaked me out to much. That is what makes me think that he is homicidal, no sane person would say that, unless they were acting. I think he's just pulling our legs though, but I'm not one hundred percent sure on that. I have noticed that he likes to play games with a lot of people's minds. Maybe he's an extremely good actor. I've pondered that theory once or twice. I guess if he can pull it off in court then it will be enough to keep him from going to federal, he'll just stay in Arkham.

I really want to figure out his character. He is extremely vicious at times, hysterical at times, and at time completely random. He is very creative, enjoyable, intelligent, and homicidal. He is The Joker; who seems to be a crazy character in our game of life.

Just blogging

Dr. Harleen Quinzel