pMarco walked out of the lunch line with his mush. He had his book bag on one shoulder, crumpling his jacket sleeve. Today he wore his favorite jacket; purple with a hood. His jeans fit his perfectly and matched his black graphic tank top. Looking around anxiously he spotted who he was looking for. He exited the cafeteria and entered the humid air. With a smile on his face, he walked over to a girl wearing a maroon t-shirt and a black jacket sitting on the ground. Marco crossed his feet, wearing black converse, and gracefully collapsed to the ground. /p
pThey were sitting up against a fence at the side of the school. Marco started with "Hey Ymir," and laid his lunch tray on his lap while hitting his spork against his knee until the plastic enclosing it ripped off. "Shall we continue?" Ymir replied playfully, referring to the 20 questions game they started earlier that day. They both chuckled, but Marco's smile faded when he noticed that Jean, a boy with bleached hair and sparkling teeth, took a seat near him against the fence. He ran his fingers through his hair. "You were on number 16. Shoot," Marco stated with a timid smirk./p
pEssentially ignoring Jean's arrival, Ymir thought about his question carefully. When she was ready, she turned to look at Marco with a diabolical, crooked smile and asked, "Who do you like?" Marco tilted his head and frowned, replying "Nobody. If I liked someone, you'd know," exaggerating the last word. "You swear?" Ymir looked at him with cautious eyes. "Yes I swear that I don't like any-" Ymir interrupted him, "To god," her voice was stern. "To god." /p
pThey both looked forward. It was silent for a long while. The silence was broken by someone chuckling – Jean. Marco turned to look at him and followed his gaze. He blushed realizing what he was looking at. He still hadn't uncrossed his fingers from behind his back. /p
p***/p
pThe rest of lunch was plain degrading. Marco tried to use his hair to cover his shameful face for the remaining 30 minutes. He knew that Jean was sitting there silently judging him. After all, he just had a crush; he didn't actually "like like" anybody. /p
pWhatever. He wished he could just collapse in on himself and black-hole into non-existence. Ymir's questions kept on coming, but they weren't nearly as bad as that first one. He just hoped no one would notice his sudden change of mood. /p
pAfter what felt like forever, the bell rang. Marco got up quickly and nearly ran over the trash can trying to escape Jean's judging eyes. Oddly enough, Jean didn't say anything to him. However, he did smile and laugh at him. So this is what losing your dignity feels like. Jean turned to walk away and Marco's muscles loosened as he slouched in relief. /p
p*** /p
pMarco walked into art class and took a seat in the far corner. The surrounding seats were empty and Marco looked around for Jean in the small classroom. He couldn't spot him. Then the door opened and kids started filling the seats. All Marco could do was wish that Jean sat nowhere near him./p
pThen, the flawlessly handsome and alluring Bertholdt sat in the back of the class to Marco's right. Still no sign of Jean Marco thought to himself as he traced Bertholdt's perfectly gelled hair with his eyes. Before class began however, someone slid into the chair to his left. He turned his head to examine his classmate and stopped breathing. It was Jean./p
p***/p
p"You ok there?" Jean asked flashing his pearly whites. Marco responded with a "Yeah. I'm fine," but it came out less convincing than he had hoped./p
pThe teacher announced that they would be watching some videos on Van Gogh and Vespucci. For most kids this was great news, but for Marco, he had to sit next to Mr. Perfect Smile, #YOLO_swag over here for an hour and a half! He was less than impressed. /p
pThe lights flicked off while Jean rummaged through his book bag. Marco leaned over to get a better view of what he was doing. Holding his binder, Jean slipped a piece of paper out from inside and placed it on top. He grabbed a pencil from his pocket and started scribbling. /p
pAs the first few images of the projection appeared on the banged-up wall, Jean handed Marco the paper. Marco hesitated. It read:/p
pSo... do you always lie through your teeth to your friends like that? Or just when I'm in ear shot? /p
pHis stomach turned and he felt nauseous. What do I write? Who does he think he is? Many questions popped into Marco's head when he reached down to grab his binder off the floor. After thinking awhile, he returned the paper with the response:/p
pNo/p
pMarco was hoping it would end there and he would crumple up the paper and throw it deep into the bowels of his book bag. But with his luck, Jean jotted something else down and laid it on top of his binder. Marco sighed and looked down:/p
pWhy did you lie about it earlier today?/p
pMarco's face went hot, and he wrote:/p
pI didn't lie! Plus it's none of your business anyways.../p
pMarco tried to ignore Jean after that, but with no response, he looked over at Jean curiously. All he could make out was a lot of scribbles, and that was alarming. Jean passed Marco the paper with a triumphant look and Marco quickly realized why:/p
pDo you like Mike, Christian, Noah, Brian…?/p
pJean had written down every guy's name in the class and put a question mark after it. It was no secret that Marco was gay. He skimmed through the list, but failed to see the name he was looking for – Bertholdt. Marco wrote:/p
pNo one on that list/p
pJean replied quickly. He handed the sheet of paper to Marco, but before Marco got a chance to even grab it, Jean took it back and scribbled something else on it. It read:/p
pWho did I forget? Oh! And me./p
pMarco rolled his eyes:/p
pDon't flatter yourself. Trust me it's not you... look a little harder Einstein./p
pJean looked around with searching eyes for a while. Can he be so unobservant? As Marco was beginning to doze off, he felt a tap on his shoulder- of course it was Jean. Jean handed Marco the paper with a grin that went from ear to ear. At this point, if Jean got it wrong, Marco would never look at him the same:/p
pBertholdt/p
pJust the name sent excited shivers through his body, and fluttering butterflies through his stomach. Marco turned to look at him and nodded hesitantly. Jean's smile hadn't changed though. Marco wondered why he was so excited that it was Bertholdt. Marco folded the paper neatly and tucked it away into his book bag. He looked at the time on his phone and shrank into his chair when he realized there was still 40 minutes of class left./p
pHe pulled the folded paper back out of his bag and wrote down:/p
pDo you ever hang out with him?/p
pMarco handed Jean the paper half-heartedly. Jean handed it back:/p
pYeah. We're cool. Do you want advice?/p
pWhy was Jean so eager to help? But Marco wasn't turning the offer down. It was like shoving crackers in his mouth and standing on a tight rope trying to talk to Bertholdt. He quickly scribbled:/p
pSure/p
pIt was a long while before Marco got the note back:/p
pstyle your hairbr /
wear something bright and tightbr /
paint your nailsbr /
wear heelsbr /
wear lip gloss/p
pWow:/p
pYou just described word for word the characteristics of "a popular"/p
pJean wrote:/p
pYou asked. That's what he's into./p
pWell, Marco did ask. And he wasn't letting the information go to waste. He folded up the paper again and placed it in his book bag. He pulled out his phone from his back pocket and texted his mom:/p
pAre we busy this weekend? I want to go shopping./p
pHe frequently checked it for any new texts. He was almost bouncing in his chair for school to be over. Finally, the bell rang./p
pJean stopped right in front of Marco's path, though, and asked, "Your phone number?" Marco wondered why he would want it, but he was so desperate to get outside that he pulled out an old gum wrapper from his pocket and stole a pen sticking out of Jean's book bag. He scribbled down his number and slid past Jean while handing it to him. "I'll text you later," Jean said as they both walked different ways. /p
pMarco looked around for Ymir and couldn't stop smiling. Once they got on the bus he propped his book bag up in his lap and oriented himself towards her. He spilled the whole story about Jean and the note, and admitted his crush to her. She couldn't be angry about Marco lying to her for too long though, because she was too excited about the new information. /p
p***/p
pMarco walked up to his front door feeling a buzz in his back pocket. He pulled out his keys and unlocked the door. Once inside he felt for his phone and typed in his password. He had gotten a text from Jean. He put down his bag and read it:/p
pCan I call you?/p
pMarco's curiosity got the best of him and he typed:/p
pSure./p
pMarco grabbed a soda and a granola bar. He waited for the phone to ring, and used his extra time to play 'Robot Unicorn Attack 2'. The screen changed to the standard photo of a generic person with Jean's name. Marco swiped his finger across the screen, accepting the call. "Hello?" Marco started the conversation. "Oh hey!" Jean replied /
The conversation started off pretty awkward to be honest. However, after 30 minutes Marco was laying comfortably on the couch smiling and talking freely. And Jean was relaxing in his reclining chair with both legs resting straight out as he listened and smiled. /p
p***/p
p "Can we talk about something other than Marco for once?" Jean's boyfriend, Reiner complained. The past few weeks Marco has been all Jean talks about, Reiner thought to himself. "Yeah, I'm sorry I have just been helping Marco with Bertholdt. And he's really excited," he said with a bright smile across his face. "Really? Well maybe you should help yourself! Because this relationship is seriously lacking attention from one side!" Reiner said before walking out of the cafeteria with his bag on one shoulder and books in his arms. He whipped like fire around the corner and disappeared./p
pJean sighed and started to grab his books to go after him. He zipped through the hallways searching for Reiner and, finally, saw him at his locker. Jean walked over, "Look, I'm sorry. I'll stop talking about him if you want," Jean pleaded. "Why do you talk about him so much, anyways?" Reiner sounded defeated. "Because, he's my friend, and I got excited about helping him. I like spending time with him, but I like spending time with you too. Why is that so bad?" Reiner hung his head and said, "Then maybe you should date Marco instead."/p
p"Why can't I hang out with both of you?" Jean demanded. "You can't have the best of both worlds Jean!" Reiner hissed. "Are we breaking up?" Reiner asked annoyed. "I guess so?," Jean answered quietly with a shrug. Reiner rolled his eyes and scoffed before he walked away, leaving Jean standing there alone./p
p***/p
pJean stood there waiting for his body to move. He didn't know what to do, so he texted Marco:/p
pNeed to talk now./p
pMarco replied quicker then expected:/p
pWhere are you?/p
pJean typed:/p
pReiner's locker./p
pJust texting his name made his body go numb. He thought about what Reiner had said… "Then maybe you should date Marco instead." What did Reiner mean? Marco was one of his best friends…/p
pNot five minutes later, Marco came up nearly sprinting and asked out of breath, "What happened?" He stared at Jean with concern filling his eyes, and Jean asked, "Can we go somewhere else?" Marco nodded and flipped a stubborn strand of hair out of his face. They walked outside silently and sat down laying their book bags by their feet. Marco looked worried./p
pJean started with "Its Reiner…" He told Marco the whole story. As soon as he was done, Marco let go of Jean's hand and wrapped his arms around Jean's shoulders. Jean returned the hug and wrapped his arms around Marco's waist. Marco leaned forwards with his soft lips touching Jean's neck and rubbed his back with both his hands comfortingly. Jean returned the gesture, wanting this moment to last forever. /p
pLater, Jean found a lip gloss stain where Marco's lips were. He didn't wipe it off./p
p***/p
pMarco walked into the noisy P.E. room. /p
pHe WAS eager to see Bertholdt, but that slipped from his mind after what Jean had just told him. His eagerness rekindled only when he saw Bertholdt's perfectly gelled hair through all the bodies. Marco began to walk over and stopped mid-footstep. He could see now that Bertholdt was sitting down talking to someone- to Reiner. /p
p***/p
pEveryone walked outside and stared up at the threatening sky permeated with dark gray clouds and slivers of light here and there. Coach motioned for everybody to go back inside. Bertholdt looked at Marco and smiled. Marco smiled back, "We got lucky," Marco commented. "Yeah. Now we can just chill and hang out," Bertholdt replied coolly. "Yup," Reiner added. Marco wondered if he knew that Jean told him about the breakup. /p
pThe rest of P.E., Marco just played 'Robot Unicorn Attack 2' to pass the time. Periodically, he looked up to see what was happening between Bertholdt and Reiner. Before he knew it, he had beaten his high score and the bell rang./p
pMarco walked into his next period class and was surprised to see Jean already sitting there. He sat next to him and asked, "Why so early?" Jean sighed and answered, "I didn't have to drop Reiner off at his history class." Marco regretted asking, "I'm sorry." /p
p"It's alright. You didn't do it on purpose." He tried to make Marco feel better. Unfortunately, it didn't work. Today was a 'crit day' in art class, and when the criticizing started, Marco reached over and grabbed Jean's hand. Jean entwined their fingers and laid them on his lap. /p
p "You feeling better?" Marco was glad to see him in an ok mood. "Does it show?" Marco smiled seeing that he felt better. Jean looked at Marco's glossed lips stretched into a smile and squeezed Marco's hand the slightest bit tighter. /p
p"Text me later ok?" They were walking out the doorway now. "Don't worry. I will," Jean said reassuringly as he walked away smiling./p
p***/p
pMarco was excited to go back to school and see Jean. He stepped off the bus and onto the sidewalk. Ymir and him had walked to the cafeteria and sat down in their usual spots. Marco was finishing up some homework and she was reading. He put his fingers on his temples and closed his eyes really tight. Wake up brain! Marco opened his eyes and looked back down at his paper. He did a double take and looked up again. /p
pHe couldn't believe what he was seeing. He was ready to throw up. It was Bertholdt… and he was holding hands with... REINER! Marco closed his binder and grabbed his book bag. He told Ymir he was going to the bathroom and walked out of there as quickly as his feet would allow. /p
p***/p
pIt was lunch time, but Marco wasn't hungry. He couldn't eat anything because he was afraid he'd throw it back up. He tapped his foot impatiently. Then Marco saw him. Jean came walking around the corner and sat down in the chair to his left. Marco looked at him and waited. /p
p"Come with me," Jean said as he grabbed his book bag. He threw Marco's lunch tray away and waited for him at the side door. Marco grabbed his bag and walked up to him. "And where exactly are we going?" Marco smiled, feeling better. "It's a surprise!"/p
pJean grabbed Marco's hand and tugged him along. He walked into the vacant library and shut the door behind them. "I have to tell you a secret," Jean whispered in Marco's ear. Marco smiled his contagious smile and Jean pulled him into a hug. Marco giggled which made Jean giggle too./p
pJean pulled back, looked into his eyes, and moved one hand to Marco's waist, admitting, "Bertholdt doesn't like kissing people who wear lip gloss. He says it's gross and sticky." Jean stood waiting for a response. For the past 3 months, Marco had been wearing lip gloss every day since Jean told him to. "What? I don't get it," Marco looked confused. Jean smiled and whispered, "But I do." He closed my eyes and leaned up to touch his lips to Marco's, but Marco backed away. /p
pJean's smile faded and he started to back away. But before the rejection could sink in, Marco was grabbing Jean, his hands on Jean's jaw and their lips touching. They shaped their bodies against each other and stayed there for a long while. They kept locking lips. Over and over. Jean paused for a moment to lick his lips and look considerate./p
p"Cherry?" Jean mused. They laughed and their lips met again./p