The "I don't own the Anime Series that I'm writing this fanfic about" Disclaimer ; )

As you've probably heard and read a billion times by now, I do not own Sailormoon. Even if I won the Lottery.... I still probably wouldn't own Sailormoon.... *sigh* Oh well ^_^

Also, any similarities between this and any real life situations are coincidental. Any similarities between this and any other fanfics are accidental/coincidental, and are apologized for ahead of time. They are merely the end result of reading fanfics for (minor shock) 7 years. *faint*

Authors' note:

Here is the long awaited posting of my story *holds up sign that reads "Yeah" * Anyways. This story takes place after the Stars season. Japanese names will be used.

This isn't a Mamoru slamming fic. However, this is a Seiya-Usagi pairing fic. I seem to be very fond of this pairing. Critiques are welcomed ^_^ Gushing reviews are welcomed. um.... (puts on some firefighter gear) Some flames are welcomed ---Just please, don't be too hard on me, 'ne?

Prologue

A young blonde girl deep in thought sat alone staring out at the lake. The trees surrounding the area swayed gently. Above in the night sky, dark clouds passed in front of the bright full moon, mirroring it's princess's heart.

Was it an eternity that passed, or was it merely only a few minutes? It didn't really matter. No matter how much time passed, I know that the answers I seek would never arrive. Not ones that I could ever consider truly acceptable as a solution to my dilemma.

How did it all start? When did it all get so complicated? Was it when he said 'I wont forget you' during that seemingly final goodbye? Or, perhaps it was when he asked me 'Am I not good enough?' How that had hurt so! The familiar sharp stabbing pain began to take shape again. How I wish I could have told him 'You are more than good enough... I love you.' How I wish I could have held him. Instead, I had to act as if I didn't understand what he was trying to get across. I had to retreat to my naive 'meatball head' personality. No one would get hurt if I acted like I didn't understand, right? They could all laugh and say, 'Oh that silly Usagi! She'll never get it!' If only it could be that easy.

I mean, after all, I love Mamo-chan deeply. We have countless ages of love in the past binding us together. We have a daughter and a kingdom we must nurture and protect in the future. How could I truly love him though if I still love Mamo-chan so deeply? It's so confusing.. to feel the same love for two different people. Maybe its because of the way Mamoru and I acted when we first met and up to the time we found that we were Endymion and Serenity? Though, if I wasn't Serenity, would I have still been interested in Mamoru? How much of this is our past selves' love, and how much is our own?

I know I'll be happy with Mamoru, and that we'll have a wonderful daughter. Part of me though, still wonders, what would a future with Seiya had been like? Would we have had a wonderful daughter like Chibi Usa? Would Mamoru find equal happiness with someone else? Would the world they had fought so hard to protect be safe in that kind of situation?

Images of Seiya floated as slowly as sakura blossoms by her mind's eye. That chance meeting outside the filming where he had told her that she was walking towards a restricted section. How he had acted so familiar with her that first day at school. Cocky. Arrogant. Confident and Strong. Beautiful indigo-blue eyes sparkling fiercely that day at the club as he held her. I was so worried when I saw that teddy bear keychain. I had feared for the worst, that he had been turned into a Phage and either ran away, or worse -forced the Starlights to hurt him. Those same sparkling eyes looked back at me again, this time bright with unshed tears as he asked me that question. The question I had wished with all my heart that I could have answered. Seiya... I wish it were possible. I wish I had told you earlier about my destiny. Then maybe I wouldn't have hurt you so by not being able to freely return your love. You deserve better than this. A loving girl who wouldn't hesitate to say she loves you. One that could stand by you...

The whistling sound of wind passing through the trees caused her to look up at the moon. The shadows were still frequently passing its milky white face. When the moon managed to peak out again, it was only to taunt it's princess again as one of it's liquid beams of moonlight hit my left hand, or more specifically my ring finger. A bright twinkling rainbow caught my eye and reminded me about why I had come out here in the first place. The stone shimmered like so many unshed tears... sadly beautiful.

I'm getting married to my prince in only a few months time. Finally, after so many years. So many battles. I should be out celebrating and jumping with happiness... It still feels strangely hollow.

I had originally planned on asking one of my senshi to deliver the invitations to the Starlights and their Princess. That was before I thought about what would happen if I let Minako take them there. If only for the sake of poor Yaten I should take them there myself. Maybe I just want to see Seiya again? At the same time that it would lift my spirits to see my dear friend and love again... it would be like stabbing the heart with a blunt knife. No, perhaps I should just give them directly to Kakyuu-hime. I'm glad that at least my powers have gotten to the point where I can transport so far by myself safely.

Concentrating on my hearts desire to go to the planet Kinmoku, I asked the silver crystal to lend me it's power and disappeared in the wink of an eye.