Shopping with Jane and Maura
By: BeForeverYoung
"That is it I can't take it anymore," cried out Jane as she threw her hands up in frustration as she saw her girlfriend round the corner with a little black cocktail dress to try on.
"I swear to go Maura if you make me try on one more thing I will go rouge cop and start putting bullet holes in all these pretty little dresses you love," threatened Jane pointing at her friend stopping her in her tracks.
If Jane wasn't so grumpy and snappy at the moment she might have found the look of pure horror that marred her best friends face at the mere mention of defiling any of these clothes to be actually quite humorous. But she was grumpy and snappy and extremely tired that if she even saw another outfit at the moment she was scream.
"Ten full years of your pay check couldn't afford to buy this store a new stock," pointed our Maura. "Besides Jane isn't this how a bet is supposed to work," whined Maura in a very unlike-Maura fashion. "I won the bet so you have to do what I want." She began to walk towards Jane again holding the black dress out smiling.
"Now just wait one second," threatened Jane holding up her hand signaling for her friend to stop, "if that dress comes within 5 feet of me I cannot be held accountable for my actions."
Maura just simply rolled her eyes and took a step forward smirking at Jane's antics, "stop be such a hurt loser and try on the dress."
Now it was Jane's turn to roll her eyes, "Maura sweetie you said that wrong it is 'sore' loser not hurt."
"Ohh…" said Maura still approaching Jane with the dress.
"Ah…Ahh…Ahhh" yelled Jane, "Just stop, Maura I am serious I am done trying on anymore clothes."
"You lost the bet Jane!" said Maura as she crossed her arms across her chest like a two year old pouting.
"You tricked me!" yelled Jane. "I didn't know it was practically impossible to eat 6 saline crackers in under a minute with no water!"
"Well it is," said Maura smiling as the memory of Jane trying to eat the crackers came into her mind. She shook her head as if to wipe away the memory, "it doesn't matter you took the bet and you lost. If you would have won I would be sitting in a dirty, unsanitary monster truck rally with gas fumes killing my brain cells and a bunch of old men grabbing my Gluteus Maximus."
"Ohh…for heaven sakes Maura just say Ass," snorted Jane.
"Language Jane," scolded Maura as she looked around the store frantically trying to see if anyone had heard.
"Say it with me Maura," said Jane slowly a smile on her lips, "AAAA-SSSSSSSSSSSSSSS" as she sounded the word out.
"Stop it!" said Maura in a hushed whisper trying to sound serious but a tug on the corner of her lips was a dead giveaway to Jane that she was finding this highly amusing as well. "You are trying on this dress," she ordered giving Jane a look that left little to no argument.
"Fine," huffed Jane eyeing the dress in Maura's hand with disdain. "But I want a break first," she bargained, "I want a 15 minute break where I can't even see one more item of clothing."
"Jane just try on the dress," Maura said clearly ignoring her friends pleas as she held out the dress.
"Come on Maura you would have at least gotten a 15 minute pee break at the monster truck rally," whined Jane. "We have been shopping," she paused to look down at her watch, "for two straight hours without one break."
"Like I would have used the restroom at the monster truck thingy," replied Maura her nose crinkling in disgust, "even though the likelihood of contracting a STD from a toilet seat is minimal. Those seats are most likely infested with Pediculus pubis, Sarcoptes scabiei var and Herpes Simplex Virus"
"Wait…what?" repeated Jane clearly confused.
"Pediculus pubis, Sarcoptes scabiei var and Herpes Simplex Virus are STD's commonly known as Crabs, scabies and herpes…"
"Ewww…Maura," whined Jane her nose too crinkling at the thought.
"STD's are becoming more and more prominent in the United States Jane. Did you know that 1 out of 4 people in America have Herpes?" stated Maura in her matter-of-fact tone.
"LALALA…."said Jane over and over again as her fingers plugged her ears and her eyes were scrunched tightly trying to thoroughly drown out Maura's statement. "I'm not listening….I'm not listening.."
"Ohh…real mature Jane," said Maura trying to sounds stern but the amusement in her voice seemed to worm its way up to her vocal cords totally giving her away that she was finding her girlfriends behavior although atrocious quite hilarious in fact.
"Try on the dress," ordered Maura pushing the dress into the Jane's chest making her lose her balance slightly.
Jane stopped her incisive chanting to look at the dress that was now pressed into her, "What do I get if I try it on?" she asked with the Rizzoli smirk on her face.
"You get to make your partner happy," sang out Maura pushing Jane backwards into the dressing room.
"Huhh….what else to I get?" quipped Jane smiling.
"Jane!" admonished Maura, "making me happy is all that should matter to you!"
"It does," defended Jane, "but you know making your partner happy is a two way straight babe. If I make you happy, then I should get to feel happy too!"
"You get to spend quality time with your girlfriend," pointed out Maura who by now as pushed her and herself into the changing room.
"We go to work together every morning, we go to lunch with each other almost every day and we live together. I spend quality time with you every day," laughed out Jane.
"Fine Jane," said Maura as she turned to step out of the dressing room, "then maybe we should get more friends, that new officer…what was her name…Officer Kendall asked me out to lunch a few days ago, maybe I will take up her offer." Maura reached for the door ready to unlock it when she found herself pinned up against the wall of the dressing room. The firm bold of Jane's holding her tightly.
"Officer Kendall doesn't want to be your friend Maura," growled Jane directly into Maura's ear, "she wants to fuck you."
"Language Jane," whispered Maura trying to keep the quiver out of her voice, "and weren't you the one just saying that we spend too much time together."
"Maura," growled Jane as she reached around and turned her girlfriend and pinned her back against the wall as Jane stared down at her with hungry eyes. "That woman looks at you like you are a piece of meat. Do you even know how many times I have came close to shooting her!"
"You would not shoot an innocent person, let alone an innocent cop," whispered Maura breathlessly.
"Your right," said Jane her grip tightening around Maura's waist, "but that doesn't mean I won't kick the shit out of her either."
Maura opened her mouth to scold Jane like she does every time when Jane swears but Jane had other plans as she shot forwards and swallowed Maura's words with her mouth and tounge turning whatever Maura was about to say into a soft whimper.
Immediately Maura's mouth opened to mine and Jane's as her knees buckled slightly but Jane held her up. Jane's hand worked into Maura's hair pulling softly as Maura moaned into her mouth. The kiss was anything but gentle, it was rough, firm, teeth biting and tongue's soothing kind of kiss that just screamed jealousy from Jane.
Pulling back from the kiss breathlessly the two women stared at each other with clouded passion filled eyes.
"Language Jane," smiled Maura at her lover not forgetting about the curse word prior to their make out session. "You really don't like the thought of Officer Kendall and I being friends do you?" she teased.
Jane growled slightly, "as soon as we get home I am going to show over…over…and over again how much I don't like that idea," whispered Jane huskily into Maura's ear.
"Hmmm…,' hummed Muara happily and before Jane knew what was even going on she slipped herself out between Jane and the door and opened it quickly sneaking out but not before popping her head back in, "then I guess you better try that dress on so we can go home and you can fulfill that promise," she said cheekily before shutting the door.
"You little tease!" growled out Jane to her girlfriend outside the door, "you did that on purpose!"
Maura's little giggle from the outside only irritated Jane further.
"Just be a good girl Janey and try on the dress and I will reward you later for it," teased Maura.
The door burst open and Jane walked out stunningly with a very tight black dress on.
"What kind of reward," asked Jane staring at her lover who at the moment was staring at her with this dear in the head light look.
"Thanks Maura I already know I look ridiculous," said Jane but it didn't seem to break her girlfriend's trance. "Yo Maura," smiled Jane louder this time, "MAURA!" she yelled snapping her fingers in front of Maura's face.
Maura jumped slightly at Jane's loud voice, "why are you yelling?" asked Maura with wide eyes.
"You were off in la-la land," defended Jane. "So now that I tried on this stupid dress that I look ridiculous in…what do I get?"
"Jane you look absolutely gorgeous and we are getting that 'stupid dress' as you put it and I am going to make you wear it to our date this Saturday," smiled Maura. "And as for the surprise, I might have gone to that sex party that Kendall was throwing last weekend."
"You went to a sex party with Kendall!" glared Jane.
"It isn't a party to have sex Jane," laughed Maura, "it is a party where you buy things to spice up your sex life."
"We have a great sex life," defended Jane, "and I am not using anything you bought at that party with Kendall," hissed Jane distaste evident when saying the young officer's name.
"That is fine," said Maura reaching forward and ripping off the price tag off the dress, "If you don't want to use the massaging oils and a little thing called Scream 'Cream then that is okay with me. I am going to pay for this dress…" she trailed off as she went to walk away.
"Fuck…Fuck…Fuck…" mumbled Jane as she tried to get control of arousal at just the mere thought of her and Maura using her new purchases.
"Language Jane," called out Maura as she was just reaching the exit of the dressing rooms before turning around quickly and poking her head around the corner. "You sure you don't want to want to use my new purchases according to my research the effects can last up to 2 hours and heightens both the ease of stimulation and the intensity of the many orgasms you could have tonight."
"You win Maura!" whimpered out Jane as she took off the dress and changed back into her clothes in record time.
"Don't I always," replied Maura cockily.
"What a cocky little shi…" mumbled Jane as she made her way out of the dressing room.
"LANGUAGE JANE!" yelled Maura.
"I didn't even swear that time!" yelled Jane back smiling.
Tonight was going to be fun.
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