Summary
: (YAOI) Kiba and Tsume share a late-night discussion on pack relationships, love, and the true nature of paradise - as well as some "sharing" of a different sort (Tsume x Kiba)(read, you know you want to)Yay, a Wolf's Rain ficcy :D And a yaoi one, too - Tsume x Kiba. A few things to be said about that.
I know it isn't exactly a common pairing, but…oh well. I usually seem to go for the weird pairings. I know most people usually seem to like Tsume x Toboe more, but I've always seem that more as a platonic, mentor-pup type relationship. Plus, Toboe is so naïve it seems almost like pedophilia - not that that's ever really bothered me in fanfiction before, but still And Tsume and Kiba on the other hand, really seem to have a lot of unresolved sexual tension. They're also really a lot alike. I address both these things - the platonic Toboe-Tsume relationship, and the UST between Tsume and Kiba - in the fic.
Wolf's Rain just seems to me like a fandom ripe for yaoi. Four young angsty guys, alone in the wilderness for most of the time…reowr.
But as I'm sure you don't care to read more of my yammerings, please enjoy the fic….
Moonlight Dream
They say that the light of the moon is only an illusion, the reflection of the sun, and that darkness is a murky wasteland. They say that dreams are only the idle imaginings of the sleeping mind.
They say too that all the wolves are gone.
Sometimes dreams reveal our deepest truths. Sometimes a different world opens in the darkness of the night, and living dreams are born in the moonlight.
Tsume stood looking up from the mouth of the cave at the sickle of the crescent moon, as if he could find some meaning in it. This empty rock laced with stolen light, an illusion it wore even as Tsume himself wore the illusion of human flesh.
The truth and the meaning of his nature and his soul lay sleeping in the cave behind him. Four drowsing forms, human and wolf alike: Hige, Toboe, Blue…and Kiba.
Kiba - in his boy skin, his human form - was stirring in his sleep, growling and struggling without avail against some shadow in his mind.
So Tsume, watching, did what anyone would do. He padded quietly over to Kiba, and kicked him in the ribs.
Kiba jumped, gave a sound somewhere between a growl and a yelp, rolled over, and lay still. Tsume, though, knew he was awake.
In a muffled voice, thick with sleep, Kiba asked, "Tsume…what is it we're looking for, again?"
Tsume arced a brow. "Paradise."
A snort. "Looking for that is like looking for the place where rainbows begin."
Tsume shrugged, though he knew the other couldn't see it. "Maybe, but any illusion is better than this reality."
Kiba gave a noncommittal grunt, sat up and rubbed at the dreams in his eyes.
"Chezza again?" Tsume asked laconically, speaking of the girl who haunted Kiba's heart. And even the other wolf did not catch the jealousy that flickered in his eyes.
Kiba looked up to the darkened roof of the cave, like the arch of the night sky without a star. "Yes, her loss haunts me. Chezza is my heart and soul. She is the gateway to the future. She is…life itself.
"She is like me, like us. She is a relic of a lost age - a lunarflower. And she is also like us in that she belongs to neither the natural nor the human world, she has no place in either. A girl made out of a lunarflower." He gave a little laugh; "Only humans would ever pull that off."
Kiba smiled for a moment, as if seeing something that Tsume could not. "And she speaks to me also of my past. There was a meadow of lunarflowers where I was born, where I first lived with my family. That was the only place I was ever really happy.
"All this I see in her. If this was the joy of my past, perhaps she will be the joy of my future. If I save her, perhaps she will save me."
"Well, that was certainly poetic of you," Tsume smirked. "Kiba, Kiba. Under that mask of angst and strength, still just a little wolf cub hungry for love."
A white wolf glared back at him. A growl sounded deep in its throat.
Tsume gave him a war-weary look. "I will not fight you tonight," he said in a tone that brooked no argument, and sat down.
Kiba, human again, tossed him another dirty glare. "Like you don't feel that way for Toboe."
Tsume blinked, and stared at him blankly. It was, really, almost comical to see his expression.
"Like you don't want him."
Tsume stiffened at this, and his eyes went cold. "I assure you, my feelings for Toboe are completely platonic. He is really no more than a pup, and he has no one else to watch over him. Maybe…" Tsume looked strangely thoughtful for a moment; "Maybe I feel the need to protect the small ones because no one ever protected me.
"Besides," Tsume's eyes lifted now, the same old defiance in them once more. "Toboe is pack. As are Hige, Blue, and even you. I've never called anyone my pack before."
Now it was Kiba's turn to blink and stare in surprise. "When I first met you, you tried to kill me."
"Well, you tried to kill me first. But I spared your life, and gave you a piece of advice that forever changed it: Do not kill without need.
"Also," Tsume shrugged. "You can't always choose your friends, and you can't always choose your family. Certainly I never chose this pack of fools."
Then he paused for a moment. "But do you know what I thought when I first met you?" Tsume was looking at him in a way Kiba had never seen before.
"Do I ever know what you're thinking?" Kiba gave a wry little smile.
Tsume chose, for the moment, to ignore this. "I though that we were walking opposite ways on the same path. I thought that we were both alone, and that maybe only we could each ease the other's loneliness."
Kiba had no sarcastic answer to this, and there was silence between the two for a moment. Kiba looked at Tsume slowly, and tilted his head. "You're not acting like yourself tonight," he said.
Tsume grinned, and shrugged again. "Well, things change in the moonlight. And besides, how do you know this isn't who I most truly am?"
Kiba turned away for a moment, towards the face of the moon. When he looked back to Tsume, there was a strange smile on his face. "I think I know why only wolves can enter paradise."
Tsume blinked. "Why?"
Kiba's smile grew, and he inched closer to Tsume, on his hands and knees. "Because only wolves can truly love, without regret or holding back. Untainted love, pure as the light of angels or the scent of lunarflowers. It's true with all the beasts. Only humans have lost that purity, that ability to love without selfishness, and only by returning to their roots are they able to cross the threshold. Yes, we love. As brothers, packmates, friends…and lovers."
They were so close now, Tsume could feel Kiba's breath hot against his face, and see his soul through those hauntingly blue eyes. And then he understood. He opened his mouth to Kiba's kiss, and lifted his body to his waiting hands.
There was no confession. There didn't need to be. They understood each other, and they both knew that this was only a one-time thing, a brief dream in the moonlight.
Tsume lost himself in that silken darkness, could lose himself in it forever. Kiba was the one who pulled away first, breathless.
"If I'm hungry for love," Kiba whispered, resting his head on Tsume's shoulder, "Then feed me."
Tsume said nothing in reply. But he was smiling as he lay Kiba down where the cascade of moonlight lent strange luminescence to the skin of them both….
Kiba snuggled like a cub against Tsume's side, strangely tender. His head rested against Tsume's chest, so the other wolf felt rather than heard his softly whispered words.
"I think I know what paradise is."
A grunt. Kiba took this as a cue to proceed.
"This is paradise. This right now, right here. This holding and being held, this simple love. Some call the in which we are living hell, but paradise is here, too, and it shines like beams of light into the valley of darkness.
"All that we search and search for, seek after, run a thousand miles for…is dwelling within us, and in the eyes of the one we love."
Again, Tsume said nothing. Yet he was smiling, and he held Kiba close as his words followed them both down into the darkness of both their dreams.
And in the sky, the sickle moon cast its light over all.
FINIS
Thank you for reading! And please review. I'd really just like to see how many people read this fic, and whether it scared them or not :P