Disclaimer: I do not own any characters of The 100.

Chapter One

Clarke Griffin pushed through the door to Grounders, the bar on the corner that she frequented with her friends and quickly spotted them in the corner. Both of her roommates, Raven Reyes and Octavia Blake, sat with beers in front of them. Their heads were close together as they were obviously gossiping. Their other friends Nathan Miller, Jasper Jordan, and Monty Green were sitting at a nearby table with both girls' boyfriends Wick and Lincoln. Their eyes were glued to the television as they watched the football game. There was only one notable absence - Bellamy Blake. Octavia's older brother wasn't anywhere to be found which disappointed her, but she pushed that thought away when the girls noticed her and waved her over.

"Hey Clarke," Raven lifted her beer to the bartender to indicate he bring another over. She glanced back at her friend and rose a dark eyebrow. "You couldn't even change out of your scrubs?"

"I know it's lazy of me, but it's been such a long week that I don't even care anymore," Clarke reached for the beer the bartender sat in front of her and tipped the bottle back. Despite her better judgement she kept chugging it and set the empty bottle back down not long after. The bartender, very familiar with the girls, set another in front of her with a chuckle. Clarke thanked him and sipped the second beer.

"Clarke slow down," Octavia chuckled and gave Clarke a gentle push into the stool next to her. "Do you have a shift tomorrow at the hospital?"

"No I'm off for a couple days," Clarke popped a couple nuts in her mouth from the bowl sitting between them. "And I plan on getting trashed tonight."

"Not that I'm all for it, because I have a couple days off myself," Raven replied. "But what happened to make you need to get trashed?"

"You know that little girl with Leukemia that we thought was doing better?" Both girls nodded. Clarke was a doctor for the Child Oncology Ward at their local hospital. She was incredibly good at her job, able to connect with the kids and make them smile despite their illnesses. She thrived on the chance to make a difference, but it took a lot out of her emotionally too. "She passed away today. Her mom and dad were with her and her mom thanked me. She actually thanked me for caring for her daughter. For all the good I actually did."

"Clarke you know you did all you could," Octavia placed her hand on Clarke's forearm and squeezed. "You can't blame yourself."

"I know," Clarke swiped at a tear that suddenly trailed down her cheek. "Doesn't make me feel better though."

Octavia shared a look with Raven, both girls knowing no matter what they said Clarke wouldn't listen. Octavia certainly understood the need to forget what happened during the work day. Despite her girly appearance she was tougher than most. When most people found out she worked for the local SWAT team they assumed she was lying. But being raised by an older brother, she was a tomboy that didn't mind getting dirty. When it was time to choose a career for herself she knew she wanted to make a difference and had quickly set her sights on SWAT much to her brother's surprise and protests. Raven on the other hand was what her boyfriend Wick called a grease monkey. She was a mechanic and had just recently bought her own garage with Wick. He was her best friend contrary to the impression their constant ribbing and teasing gave off.

"Where's Bell?" Clarke asked glancing back at the guys table, the dark curly haired man still missing from the group.

"Oh that's what we were talking about when you walked in," Octavia rolled her eyes. "He's on a date."

"Really?" Clarke tried not to show how much that news hurt.

"Really," Raven said as she finished offer her own beer and signaled for another.

"Do we know her?"

"Nope," Octavia replied with a bitter smile. "They met at the grocery store I think. I don't know if it'll go anywhere."

Clarke nodded absently as her thoughts strayed and the other two continued to talk beside her. Clarke had known both Octavia and her older brother Bellamy for years. She'd always loved him, but when they were younger it was more of a crush. She admired him more than anything else. He'd taken on a lot at a young age when his mother died suddenly not long after he'd graduated high school. He'd worked a night job to earn money and put himself through the police academy. Despite the lack of money and the crappy 1 bedroom apartment they'd moved into, he'd made sure Octavia never missed out on the normal things no matter the cost to himself.

As they got older she grew closer to him. He'd become a confidant for her and no matter how harsh it was, he always told her the truth. He was as much her best friend as Raven and Octavia. Clarke had finally accepted that she loved Bellamy at her graduation from medical school. He'd screamed louder than anyone else when she walked across the stage. His approval meant more to her than her own mother. When he picked her up and spun her around later that day, whispering in her ear how proud he was of her she knew the love for him was more than puppy love for her best friends' older brother.

"I think he'd be happier with you Clarke," Octavia broke her out of the trance she'd fallen into.

"Yea well that'll never happen," Clarke smiled sadly. "He doesn't see me that way."

Clarke's mood immediately soured after that. Before she ruined the mood much further she bid her friends goodnight and left the bar. The girls' apartment wasn't far from the bar and Clarke pushed through the front door only a few minutes later. She locked the door behind her and began stripping her scrubs off on her way to her bedroom. She tossed them into the laundry basket in her closet and pulled the covers back on her bed. She buried herself under them, hoping the alcohol would dull the heartbreak Bellamy Blake had unwittingly thrown her way.