Diary Of A Madman
Disclaimer: All Final Fantasy characters, names and locations belong to Square Enix. I own nothing that you recognize.
Dearest diary,
Are you depressed? Any feelings of hopelessness or despair? I glanced at Terra and she said, "No, he causes it." I laughed at that. I laughed at many things. More than I can ever remember, more than I have before in that situation. But yes, my annual evaluation and paperwork. More goddamned paperwork than I've had to fill out before.
The woman behind the counter said I have to fill out the paperwork once a year, but I've been doing this for years and I've never had to fill out paperwork before. Terra repeated what the woman told me while we were waiting in the exam room. "They said you have to do it once a year, Kefka." And I'm sitting there with a clipboard and all these papers in my lap. I told her it would probably take the rest of the year to fill them out. She laughed at that.
And then! Then before that I'm running to the counter when they call my name and I'm telling Terra come with me! Come with me! But she's too busy digging through her bag and I don't LIKE IT WHEN SHE IGNORES ME.
But it was a fun outing. No more horrendous than usual. Said they wanted me to come back in three months for more tests. Ha! I don't think so. Six months. That's what I can do. They said three and I felt it... The anger, the hatred. I heard it in my voice though it sounded so distant, separated from myself. For a minute I didn't even realize that I'd clenched my fists and that my hands had started to shake.
But it's funny. No, I'm not depressed. I don't want to kill myself, I only want to kill everyone around me. How's that? Sound better? One day I might tell them. One day I might let them know.
~ Palazzo