"..Once upon a time, there was a kind king,"

It was from there when it all began.

November 21st, 1994. Two years of independence sure seemed like a lot; but to her, it wasn't. Day by day, she would have to act as if she were this normal girl who was happy with almost everything she had. Well, she considered herself blessed due to the fact that she had almost everything a girl wanted.. Everything..

Everything, is something that she didn't like.

There were even more things that she didn't like either, and that included having to be put down for most things. Sometimes it was work, and sometimes it consisted of family. Natalya Arlovskaya planned to live a simple life; in her petite home, and have no relations to anyone. No, she wasn't cutting herself away from the world; not at all.. But, avoid the people that tried to come in contact with her.

She was young, and she wanted almost something a girl could dream of..Marriage. Despite her age, it seems that any guy would fall for her due to her appearance, in specific terms. Her hair covered the most of her back; radiant and golden just like the color of sunflower pedals when being shined down by the sun, just as her eyes resembled the night sky when stars twinkled throughout the night. She couldn't be noticed as outstandingly perfect.

That was what others thought..But, she didn't.

Worthless..Pathetic..Maniac.. all these terms being thrown at her due to one reason.

Natalya wanted to marry her brother.

No, she wasn't just any normal girl.. She was in love with her elder brother, and that was the truth. She was determined. It was as if her mind were set on him going down on one knee and holding out a beautiful diamond ring in front of her. It was a dream that she wanted, and was going to get. After all, Ivan did promise her at a young age that he'd always protect her and love her, no matter what.

That promise was broken once the USSR had ended officially. She became independent..And she was very happy. Being told that you're free to do whatever you want is one thing, but the other side of wanting to look for love; she was determined.

For days, weeks, and months, Natalya would always be right there in Ivan's home to take care of him, and prove her love to him. Sometimes, she would have to corner him down and express it in a louder tone to get it in his head..It may have seemed scary for him, but to her; she was crying out for him.

Natalya never intended to scare him, nor hurt him at all. It was one of the things that she had never thought of herself doing otherwise.. But, it seems that he kept a journal behind her back; hidden under the staircase..There was a new journal entry almost everyday. Alright, this may have been a bit devious.. But yes, she did read through almost every journal entry. But this particular one, had been about her.

Nasty, horrid things that she could never imagine. Well, his handwriting had been a bit off.. Maybe he had been drinking when writing such a thing? What definitely caught her attention was: I will never love her.. It's incest! Incest is wrong! She needs to get help! Maybe if I send her somewhere far away, she'll leave me alone?..But I don't want her to die either.. I still love her as my sestra.. But nothing more. Why can't she just open her eyes and see it!?

She put the journal back into place, but didn't react to what she had just red. Like any girl, they would be bursting into tears and sobbing their little hearts out. That was why Yekaterina was considered weak.. She cried almost everything, right? Sure, Natalya loved her very much; but sometimes she could be annoying to the point where she thought that Ukraine was taking care of her to control her- which is a natural reaction coming from a younger sibling.

Instead, she made her way upstairs in silence. One by one, each step until she had approached the attic of her brother's large home; climbed in, and shut the door tightly.

If she were a little girl again, she would've started crying her eyes out at this point of time. No, she wasn't a little girl anymore.. And she wouldn't let her emotions get to her just as it always did. There was only one solution to deal with the case of pain.

If she was going to have to feel pain emotionally, she may as well feel it physically as well.

Natalya approached a corner and faced the wall as she took a seat; thinking for a moment or two. Had this been the right thing? She's been doing this for over a while now.. It wasn't like anyone would find out.

After all, she kept her arms covered by using the sleeves of her dresses.

This wasn't her first time performing such a thing. Yet, she felt like an idiot for doing it. It was a way to relieve stress.. And relieving stress was good, yes? Even though she had brain and a strong sense of knowledge, the darkness that had consumed her heart many years ago had won its battle. As of today, that darkness remained purging her heart, and never stopping. Natalya brushed away her long, bangs before pulling up the sleeve to her dress. No.. She couldn't do this. But on second thought..

She needed to find out why-why was this happening to her, but not anyone else? In truth, she clearly had no idea what she had been doing. But after doing it one time, the second time might not be that bad,- at least that's what she thought.

With that, the Belarusian then proceeded to reach under her dress and take out a familiar dagger that she always used..

How many people has she killed just to make her brother happy? Ten..? A hundred..? Thousands..And she didn't mean to. She was told by her brother himself that it would make him happy if she performed the job.

It was all lies..Lies..Lies that she's been dealing with! Ever since she stepped foot on this pathetic place called 'The Earth'; she's hated it. Especially now, since the only person she loves won't return that love back, even after she's done all of these terrible things for him.

They say beauty is pain.. Apparently love is pain, as well.

"..The king gave everyone money and land.. Until the country was no more.." Natalya spoke as if there were another person in the room, but in reality, it was to herself, "But I really loved him,"

"..I think he was my first love.. And he's just like that king.. The way he loses himself because of his kindness.. Aha.. I think.. He would be a great king..Especially since kings do enjoy seeing the blood of their enemies.. I'm an enemy..and enemies deserved to be punished with pain..To see their blood speared everywhere on the walls..Right?..Right?.."

The dagger from previously had still been in her left hand before she slid up the sleeve of her dress; dragging the blade ever so delicately over the pearl white skin. The sound of pain was released from her mouth as she gasped, though immediately fell silent once again as she proceeded to continue.

"..Pain..pain is what I deserve.. Everyone thinks I'm crazy, da? Oh, well, there is big sestra..and she says she loves me.. But then, she takes big brother's side and tells me to leave him alone. What have I been doing wrong? Why does no one explain to me what I have been doing wrong to big brother so I can fix it myself?"

She lifted up the blade before running it across her skin; this time, she made sure to press the blade to the point where she hopefully could feel it grind across her arm bone, "This one is for big brother..To the point where it touches inside of me..how much I love him..Why..Why does everyone hate me? I may as well hang myself..But I am strong.. and this seems to be the only solution to fixing everything-"

"..Natalya?!"

That's it for the prologue of the story. Yes, this does consist of a very, tragic RP..And yes, this is pretty much the ONLY self-harm I'll be mentioning in this story. Lets just say from the start of this, things become to get better throughout the storyline itself.

Who do you think called out her name in the end? Russia? Ukraine? Lithuania?

Well.. If you want me to continue the story; make sure to leave a review, and I may consider doing a new chapter.

But as I stated previously, this is the ONLY self-harm I'll be mentioning in this story. Seriously, the concept of self-harm and depression is fucking sad, and I needed to start off the story sad if I want to catch your guys' attention..

That's all for now.

Stay positive. :)

~Natya