Immediately after 'Complications'

After the second trip to Mexico in a week, a trip that turned out completely fruitless as Cromartie's body had disappeared from the hole they'd buried it in in the middle of the desert, and then the pointless interrogation of Ellison, John was ready to collapse. The activity of the past week, plus all the time spent driving, had taken its toll on him, and he fell on the bed shortly after returning home, even though it was only mid-afternoon. When he woke up, he could feel that he'd slept several hours, and it was likely close to midnight.

One thing that his mother had always driven into him was the ability to be instantly alert upon waking, so John's mind began processing his environment as soon as he woke up. He recognized his location as his own bed even before he opened his eyes- an automatic inventory of his surroundings, another thing his mother had taught him at an early age.

It was a surprise when he opened his eyes a few seconds after waking up, and saw a pair of brown eyes eight inches away, staring back at him. He jerked away reflexively, very nearly falling out of the bed, before recognizing his cyborg protector.

"Yaaah! Cameron! What are you doing?"

She blinked at him, as if she thought it was obvious, "I'm watching you sleep."

Frustration building, he looked at her, "Okay...why are you in my bed?"

"I calculated that if I stood in your room and watched you, it would disturb you and possibly disrupt your rest." She smiled, proud to have figured out this insight into human behavior.

He exhaled, "You can't just sneak into my bed."

"I did not sneak. I lay down on your bed as soon as I completed my patrol, seventeen minutes after you fell asleep, and did so quietly so as not to wake you. Being considerate is not the same thing as sneaking."

John gave her a tight smile, "Thank you for being considerate."

Oblivious to his sarcasm, Cameron smiled back, "You are welcome." She sat up slightly, then stared at him for a moment and tilted her head, "Is this a personal space issue?"

He frowned, confused as to what she was talking about, "What?"

"You are irritated at me, even though I was considerate and did not wake you. I have realized that you often become irritated with me when I unintentionally violate your 'personal space', therefore I speculate that that is the case."

"Yes...no. Look, Cameron, there are a lot of good reasons why you can't just climb into bed with me without my permission."

She looked at him, processing what he had just told her, "Why?"

He let out a sigh, looking at the clock which read 11:13. He thought about dismissing her question, asking her to leave, and going back to sleep, but for some reason didn't. "For one thing, because you did it without my permission, which...yeah...violates my personal space. For another, I didn't know you were there and you startled me."

"Oh. Thank you for explaining." Her face blanked, as she processed, "Does that mean that I can lie in your bed with you now that you know I'm doing it?"

John's eyes widened, "No!"

Cameron brow scrunched up in confusion, "Why not?"

John leaned closer to her, and his voice lowered, "Cameron, when people...sleep in the same bed together...it...um...implies a certain level of intimacy between them. My mom and Derek would freak if they knew you were in here."

She stared at him blankly for a moment, before understanding. "They would think we were having sex."

John hushed her, as if afraid his mother would appear out of thin air at Cameron saying the word 'sex', "Shhh! Sh!" His cheeks reddened, and his voiced lowered further, "Yeah...yeah, they would think that."

Cameron smiled, seeing a logical response, "I could tell them that we are not having sex."

John was near panicking, "Then they'd really think we were...you know."

"Having sex." Cameron paused again, processing what John had just said, before her face again scrunched up in confusion, "That is not logical."

Hoping to lure Cameron away from any more discussions involving sex- hypothetical or not- he decided instead to address the issue that had led to the discussion. "Why were you watching me sleep. Did it fulfill some mission priority?"

He was sure she looked hurt at his question, but the movement of her lips was gone before he could analyze it, "No. I can monitor your pulse and respiration anywhere within an average radius of 12 meters, depending on background noise, which includes most of the house."

Now his annoyance had been completely replaced by curiosity, "Then why did you do it?"

"I like watching you sleep."

He looked at her for a second before replying, "How can you 'like' or dislike something?"

She lowered her eyes and drew out her response. If she weren't still lying beside him on the bed, he was sure she would have shrugged. "I don't know. I find some experiences pleasant or unpleasant."

John thought about her response for a moment, "How do you distinguish between 'pleasant' and 'unpleasant'?"

Cameron considered before answering, "Pleasant experiences are ones I would choose to have happen if the opportunity arose. Unpleasant experiences are ones I would choose to avoid if possible."

John nodded at her reasoning. "What do you find unpleasant?" he asked, now completely intrigued.

Cameron paused for a moment, organizing her thoughts, "Being damaged is unpleasant."

That surprised him, "You feel pain when you're hurt?...damaged?"

"Yes. It feels different depending on whether the damage is to my endoskeleton or my organic covering, but both are...painful. Just in different ways."

John felt guilty, thinking of all the times she had been hit or shot to protect him, especially all the times that had been because of his stupid, reckless decisions, like the fight with Cromartie in Mexico, only a few days ago. "But...you never act like it hurts."

"Biological organisms have reflexes that cause them to involuntarily move away from a source of damage. I do not. I can control my reaction to damage better than a human," she explained.

John was fascinated by what he was learning, but still felt like an asshole for what he was discovering she went through for him. He hoped to move the conversation to something less painful, "What sensations do you like?"

"I like the feeling of wind on my skin or in my hair. I like the taste and texture of ice cream and milk chocolate. I like the look of purple clothing." Cameron paused for a moment, uncertain if she should say what she was thinking, "I like when I hear your voice or you touch me."

John's face reddened at her last admission. "Um...what about non-physical things. Do you have feelings about...like...situations?"

Cameron's face showed her difficulty with answering the question, "Situations generate responses in my CPU like sensations, but the responses originate in my CPU instead of my sensory systems. Some of the responses feel painful like when I'm damaged, but different. Some feel pleasant. Are those emotions?"

John was at a loss as to how to answer that. "I don't know. I guess...if you feel them, they're emotions. What are some of them. What are the pleasant ones?"

Cameron looked directly at him, "I'm currently experiencing a pleasant response because I'm with you and we're talking. Being around you and talking to you usually cause pleasant responses. When you smile at me, when you laugh, when you explain something to me, when I can help you with something, when I verify that you are safe and healthy, when I protect you, when I destroy a Terminator that was going to harm you, when weapons I'm inspecting are found to be in working order, when you trust me, when Sarah trusts me, when I do something that irritates Derek, when I figure something out about human behavior, and when I wear my purple jacket."

John was embarrassed and humbled at how many of the things she listed centered on him and his well-being, "So those things make you happy?"

Cameron tasted the word, before replying in the affirmative, "Yes. Those things make me 'happy'."

"What makes you unhappy?"

Cameron paused again to organize a list before replying, "When you are in danger, or when you place yourself in danger because of your recklessness...what is the emotion where you want to fix something but are unable to or do not know how?"

"Frustration?" John suggested.

Cameron nodded, "Yes. You are very frustrating, John."

John felt chastened, especially in light of the earlier revelation that she felt pain when she was hurt protecting him.

Cameron, for her part, continued the list of her dislikes, "When you are angry with me, when we are separated, when I don't know where you are or your condition, Derek, and Riley."

John knew he shouldn't condone it, but he couldn't help but laugh at her including Derek and Riley on her list of things she disliked.

Cameron concluded her explanation, "When you and Riley were in Mexico, I experienced numerous unpleasant responses."

John looked at her, again feeling guilty, "You were worried."

Cameron tilted her head slightly, "Yes, but that is not what I mean. 'Worry' for you is a state I am very familiar with."

Though there was no accusation in Cameron's voice, merely acceptance at her lot in life, it still did more than a dozen of his mother's lectures to make John realize what a prick he'd been in the last few weeks, and what he'd put his family and Cameron through. "I've been kind of an asshole lately, haven't I?" John asked her sadly.

Cameron rose up enough to shrug, a bit of a playful smirk on her face, "Kind of."

John realized what else she'd said, "What was the other emotion you were having?"

Cameron scrunched her face in confusion, again. "I don't know."

"Can you explain it? When do you experience it?"

"I have that response whenever you and Riley are together."

A suspicion was forming in John's mind, one he'd put aside with his assumptions about Cameron's mechanical nature lacking feelings. "What would make that situation better?"

Cameron tilted her head a bit to the side, "I don't understand."

"Use your imagination. What change would make my trip to Mexico not cause you to have that emotional response?"

Cameron tilted her head back, "I don't have an imagination."

John rolled his eyes, "You can run simulations in your CPU right? Analyzing different variables?"

"Yes."

"Then you have an imagination. It's basically the same thing."

Cameron smiled happily at John's discovery. She began running simulations. "I would not have that response if Riley were not with you."

"What if someone else were with me?"

"It varies depending on who your companion is. Of the people that you know, I would not have that feeling if you were with Sarah, Derek, Charlie Dixon, or Morris."

'I really don't know very many people, do I?' John thought, "Is there anyone else who would cause that reaction?"

"Cheri Westin."

John didn't remember the last time he had thought of Cheri Westin. "Who would you prefer to have been with me in Mexico?" John asked. If Cameron understood inflection and context clues better, she would have recognized that John's question was a trap.

Cameron gave the answer John was expecting, without hesitating. "Me." John did not, however, expect the elaboration that followed, "I would always prefer to be with you instead of Riley."

John considered his suspicion confirmed, but still felt the need to ask, "Cameron...are you jealous?"

Cameron looked down, refusing to meet his eyes, "I don't know. I don't know what 'jealous' feels like."

John was certain that he was learning to read Cameron, and he was sure she wasn't telling him the truth. "You're lying," John said more harshly than he meant to.

Cameron's eyes locked with John's. He thought it was the first time he'd ever seen her look caught.

Softer he asked, "What would you like? What would make you happy?"

Cameron's eyes fell again, and she responded much quieter, "I wish you would stop seeing Riley and do the things you do with Riley with me."

"Cameron...are you saying that you want to be...in a relationship with me?"

Cameron thought about the question for a full second, "Yes."

John knew he was attracted to Cameron, and had been since he'd first met her in New Mexico, but he'd buried those feelings since his birthday when a car bomb caused her to malfunction and attempt to kill him. After that he forced himself to see her as only a machine. Now he was forced to reconsider that assumption and those buried feelings were coming to the surface.

Could he be in a relationship with Cameron? Was she capable of that?

John placed his hand on her cheek, and tilted her face towards him. He leaned in and kissed her gently. After a moment, he pulled away suddenly.

"I'm sorry Cameron. I shouldn't have done that."

She looked at him, not understanding his apparent change of heart. "I don't mind," she assured him quickly.

John grinned nervously, "I know...I mean..." he closed his eyes for a moment and tried to get control of himself, "I mean that...I need some time to think before I can make a decision on something this important." John saw her disappointment, and added, "I'm sorry. I know that's not what you want to hear, but if I rush into something before I figure things out, we'll both get hurt."

"You need to figure out how you feel about Riley." For a machine that everyone supposed felt nothing, Cameron managed to put an enormous amount of contempt into her facial expression when she said the other girl's name.

John shook his head, "I need to sort out how I really feel about Riley and how I feel about you. Plus we have to deal with mom and Derek. If we're...in a relationship, they're going to flip."

"Unlikely. While both Sarah and Derek Reese are in adequate physical condition for humans, neither possesses the acrobatic skill to do flips."

John was about to explain what he meant when he saw the playful smirk on her face. He grinned back.

"I fooled you."

"Yeah, you're too good at that sometimes. Anyway, mom and Derek will be very upset and make things difficult for us." John stated himself literally, his own way of teasing her back.

Cameron nodded in agreement. "If it makes things easier for us, I could terminate Derek Reese."

John's head, which had been looking up at the ceiling, jerked around to look at her, "No! Don't do...wait. You're teasing me again, aren't you?"

Cameron smiled at him, "I fooled you again."

John laughed at her occasionally disturbing sense of humor. He looked back at the clock. It was just before midnight. "Give me until this time tomorrow to think about things, and we'll talk about it then. Is that okay?"

Cameron considered, "Yes John. 11:46 tomorrow." Cameron's system added an item in her task manager to speak with John about their relationship at 11:46 pm the next day. "Do you want me to leave you alone?"

John thought about it for a moment, "No, you can stay if you want to. But you'll need to get up before mom wakes up. No need for her to explode before we're ready."

"She would think we had sex and freak," Cameron nodded solemnly. Cameron added 'explode' to her vocabulary program as a synonym for 'become angry'.

John laughed, "Yeah. Night Cameron."

"Goodnight John." After a moment, Cameron added, "I actually would terminate Derek Reese, if you wanted me to."

John couldn't help snickering, he rolled onto his back, "Don't terminate anyone while I'm asleep."

"Alright John." Cameron then clarified, "Unless it's necessary."

John rolled his eyes, and said more insistently, "Goodnight Cameron."

"Goodnight John."