Just something I had kicking around. A short story a bit more #Burzek focussed than my other stories about this family. It is meant to be a follow on from Something in the Night but I guess it's a little stand alone as well. Fair warning...it might make you cry.

This is your sword, this is your shield

This is the power of love revealed

Carry it with you wherever you go

And give all the love that you have in your soul. – Bruce Springsteen

Adam pulled into the driveway. The lights of his house lit up before him yet never before did he not want to go inside as much as he did right now. His gut was one big knot, he felt like he wanted to puke.

Taking a deep breath he opened the door, the cold air smacked him in the face and let him know he was alive. It was the only thing that did, that and the pain in his heart.

The warmth of the air inside was stifling and the noise in the house was overwhelming but it was laughter and he wondered if he was ever going to hear that sound again.

Kim turned to look at him as he stood in the doorway, his hands shaking so much he shoved them in his pockets. "What's up Adam? You okay? You look like you've seen a ghost." Her heart started to thud wildly. "Adam you are scaring me."

He pulled Kim back into the lounge and asked the kids to come sit down. He had to do this all at once; he could only do it once. "Umm, I got a call this afternoon. There was a car accident, near the beach house."

Kim's hands flew to her face. She knew.

Adam looked at her and reached for her hand and then at those four faces looking back at him. "Mum and Dad, they are not coming home."

"Where are they?" Alfie didn't get it but Lola and Mae did.

"No, No, No." Lola screamed. "You are lying. No Pops, No."

"Where are they Pops?" Alfie's little voice was quivering. Mae was staring straight ahead and hadn't said a word or moved. Of all the notifications he had done over the years this was by far the worst. His own heart was broken, his wife's heart was broken and he was about to ruin his grandchildren's future.

"I'm sorry. Mom and Dad died. They are dead. The car crash was a bad one and they didn't make it."

It was like the clock wound back when Lola stood up and slapped her Pops across the face. Kim reached for her but she screamed at her not to touch her. Mae still hadn't moved and Alfie fell into his Pops' arms. Iris just sat there watching them. She had no idea how much her world had just changed.

"I'm so sorry." It was all Adam could say as he cradled Alfie. Kim moved and sat with Mae who was in some state of shock and she let Iris climb into her lap. She had no idea what was going on but everyone was crying and that upset her.

"Mummy home soon." She asked innocently and Kim's damn wall broke.

"Oh my poor baby girl." She sobbed.

Adam handed Alfie over to his grandmother and went in search of Lola. She was lying face down on her bed sobbing uncontrollably. "Oh Lola Bear."

"It's not true, please Pops."

"Lola Bear I would do anything to tell you it's not true, anything but I can't." Adam lay down beside his granddaughter and was relieved that she let him hold her. "I want to fix this, I want to fix your Mum and Dad but I can't."

"What do we do now?"

"Right now we stay right here and cry and we hold onto each other, all of us."

"I want my Mom and Dad." She wailed. His world had been shattered, he'd lost his daughter but listening to his granddaughter's grief was a pain he never thought he'd feel.

He had four beautiful grandchildren and they were orphans. They would forever go through life without their parents. Their Mom and Dad would never see them grow up, become adults, fall in love, marry, have children. Iris would probably never even remember them and that really hurt.

"So do I Lola Bear."

He stayed with her until she fell asleep. He had no idea how long it had taken but when he headed back down Kim was still sitting on the couch with Alfie on her lap, Mae beside her and Iris was playing next to her.

"Where's Lola?" She slipped Alfie off her lap and asked Mae to cuddle him. She did so wordlessly and then she fell into Adam's arms.

"Asleep."

"I know Darlin'. I know." He whispered as she sobbed her heart out. Adam was devastated listening to Kim's hysterical wails. He took her out of the lounge and caught her as her knees buckled. "I'm so sorry Kim." He had no idea how he was doing it, how he was still standing but he had too. He had no choice.

They called Angus and he came straight over before they called Sam's family. The grief was overwhelming for the kids and they struggled to cope with them. Lola refused to come out of her room, Mae hadn't said a word all night and Alfie was distraught and trying to protect Iris from everyone. He didn't want anyone to touch her. "No." He pushed his Uncle away. "Only our family can touch us."

"Alfie, it's okay." Adam tried to reason with him. "Let Gus help."

"No, stay away. She's my sister. Mum and Dad would want me to look after Bug." He pushed Adam away. "I'm the man now. It's my job."

Mae worried them the most. She had not said a word all evening. Everyone tried to talk to her and she didn't say a thing. Even when Iris tried to talk to her she just stared at her and eventually she disappeared and they found her curled up on her bed sound asleep.

Lola came out to help put Iris to bed and Alfie insisted on sleeping with her.

It was only once they were all in bed and everyone had gone home that Adam and Kim fell apart. Their baby girl was dead, their beautiful Polly gone in the blink of eye, her life snatched away and four beautiful children left behind. They took a tiny little bit of solace from the fact that it happened quickly, they didn't suffer and Sam was with her.

Adam had barely taken in what the police had told them about the accident but that one thing he remembered, they'd told him that they died instantly. The moment the truck came around the bend on the wrong side of the road and slammed into them head on. They had gone up to the Beach House for a couple of nights before they headed home to Australia. They had bought them home for Christmas like they promised when they went back when Sam took the job to open a new Open Range Zoo.

"This is a nightmare. I want to wake up." Adam cried, he buried his face in his hands and sobbed. "I don't know what to do."

"Oh god, oh god." Kim couldn't help him. She didn't know what to do or say the state of shock rendered her useless to her husband.

They barely slept and weren't surprised when Mae silently crawled into bed between them. She didn't even speak when Iris came in asking for Dada or Mommy when she woke. Kim burst into tears and her brief hope that it was just a nightmare was shattered when she blinked and realised they weren't there and never would be again.

Alfie woke up screaming and Kim bolted from the bed and Lola was already with him. "Where's Bug?" he panicked.

"She's with Pops. She's okay Alfie." Kim watched as Lola comforted her brother. The kids were circling their wagons, they were pulling each other close and that was a tiny sliver of light in all this gloom.

Except Mae, she was pulling away from everyone. She wasn't talking and no matter how much they tried to talk to her she just shut down and it worried them.

Iris was torn, her siblings behaviour was unsettling her, but she was three and life was different for her. When word got out and people starting turning up to the house things spiralled. She clung to her MiMi, like she would do to her Mum and Dad. She asked for them every time she heard their name and looked for them constantly and would pull away from everyone who tried to touch her and get upset, so much so Kim had to ask people not to touch her.

As the house filled with people and flowers Adam noticed that they kids had disappeared. He found them, in Lola's room all curled up together on her bed and he didn't even ask them to come out. Sitting on the edge of the bed he asked them if they needed anything and to call him if they wanted him or MiMi and left them alone.

He would have sat with them all afternoon to stay away from the misery downstairs but it wasn't fair on Kim who was barely keeping it together and when Iris fell asleep Kim put her to bed and it wasn't long before Alfie was sleeping with her. He didn't want her to be alone, he didn't want her to get scared becuase they 'were all alone now.'

While their grief was all consuming it was the kids that weighed the heaviest on them so they had to keep going. They refused to talk about the funeral. Lola told them to "Stop, stop talking about it. You are upsetting Mae and Alfie." When she overheard them discussing it with Heidi.

"Chicken."

"Don't call me that. Nobody calls me that anymore." She yelled at them. "So stop it."

"Okay, okay Lola. Please sit down." Kim reached for her hand. "I know this is upsetting, trust me I don't want to talk about it either, neither does Pops and Heidi but we have to decide some things."

"No." Lola shook her head. "We don't want to do this."

They left it for another day, having made some initial plans they delayed it again.

Mae still wasn't talking. They talked to Hudson about her and he wasn't concerned at this stage, it wasn't unusual for a child her age to shut down. He suggested that they all have counselling sooner rather than later though.

Right now they were taking their anger out on Adam and Kim and everyone around them. It was hard to watch and Adam and Kim were struggling. They were grieving too and people wanted to help them and they let people help out with meals and menial tasks while they focussed on the kids. Things happened around them and they were grateful for their families and friends.

Not that anyone was eating much. It was a never-ending nightmare and the days were long and relentless.

Gus was always at his parents house if he wasn't at work and Rhiannon had came a few times but Vivienne wanted to play with them and that upset Alfie and Mae and Lola told them to take her home. They tried not to take it to heart but it was gut wrenching to see these beautiful happy children so utterly broken.

Iris started to lash out. She was getting emotional and irrational and Alfie tried to look after her and push everyone else away. He hit Adam when he tried to step in and take Iris from him when he was trying to hug her. Alfie was holding on so tight to her she was crying. "I hate you." He screamed at his Pops. "I hate you."

"I love you Alfie." Was all he could say. "Let me know if you need me to help with Iris."

They had temper tantrums, tears, anger, nightmares and regression. It was an emotional rollercoaster twenty-four hours a day. There was hardly any relief or any time for Adam and Kim to deal with their own grief. A few minutes at night to give into it was all they got before they had someone in bed with them or they ended up sharing a bed with a couple of small bodies. It wasn't long before Kim slept with Alfie and Iris and Adam slept with Mae, in the same room as Lola. They didn't even get the chance to comfort each other.

Iris suddenly stopped using the bathroom, she wasn't great at it to begin with but she regressed but they couldn't get mad at her, even though the others did. Alfie's anger was getting worse and not only had he yelled and hit Adam, he hit Iris too. "Enough Alfie, don't hit Iris." Kim grabbed his arm. "I know you are upset and angry but don't take it out on Iris, she doesn't understand." He dissolved into tears and Kim felt terrible for yelling at him. They were struggling to cope with them and constantly worried if they were doing the right thing or not. People were full of advice but all they could do was trust their gut and do what they thought was best. Only time would tell if it was the right thing to do.

Mae still hadn't spoken. It had been three days since they heard her voice. Hudson kept telling them it was okay and if and when she did talk to them the best thing they could do was act normal, not make a fuss and answer her like they usually would. He doubted she even knew what she was doing.

Getting them to eat was a challenge and the diet left a lot to be desired because they let them eat whatever they felt like. Generally they picked at it anyway and Kim had lost her appetite completely which worried Adam as well. They were falling apart moment by moment and there didn't seem an end in sight.

Lola came down and sat next to her Pops late one night. She knew her mum used to do it and Adam wiped away the tears as she curled up next to him. "Does it ever stop hurting Pops?"

"I don't think so Lola Bear." He had been careful not to call her chicken anymore. That was what her parents called her and she had made it very clear she didn't want to hear it again.

"I miss them so much."

"Me Too."

"I'm scared."

"About what?"

"What happens to us now?"

"Right now you are staying here, all of you and in a few weeks time we will all sit down, with Heidi and Hudson and talk about what things might look like in the future." They had no idea what it was going to look like in a week, month or six months time. Hell they struggled to get through a day. "Whatever happens Lola you will all be together and MiMi and I will be with you."

"Can we stay with you?"

"For now yes."

"You don't want us?"

"Oh Lola Bear, every single day." He hugged her close and kissed the top of her head. "I want to spend every day with you. Your Mum and Dad wanted lots of things for you and they wrote those things down and talked to us about it. Everyone just wants the best for you all, like your Mum and Dad did."

"Pops, I am worried about Mae, she's so sad."

"Has she said anything to you?"

"No, she's not talking. I tried to talk to her and I know she is listening. Why won't she talk?"

"Everyone handles things like this differently. That's grief Sweetheart, it feels different for everyone and for Mae she is handling it by not talking to us. We just need to be patient with her, keep talking to her and when she is ready to talk she will let us know. I know you will keep looking after her and if she says something to you try not to get too excited and just keep talking to her normally. Can you do that?"

"I'll try. I just want her to talk to me." Lola loved being close to her Pops right now. "I want to tell her I love you."

"Oh Bear, just keep telling her that. She can hear you." They talked to Mae as much as she let them, and they knew she was listening to them. They had found her crying in her room, curled up on her bed and noticed her disappear when people came to the house but she would respond when they talked to her and also sought them out for a cuddle when the house was quiet. She would play with Iris silently but listen to her talk, take her to the bathroom if she asked or get her a drink.

She was quiet for a while. "Iris won't remember them will she?"

"We will make sure she does. There are so many photos and videos of your Mom and Dad and all your memories you can share with her."

"Are you sad Pops?"

"Lola Bear, I am heartbroken." He sobbed and Lola crawled into his lap and wrapped her arms around his neck. You were never too big for a hug.