Title: At Dusk
Rating: M
Pairings: Roxas/Xion
Disclaimer: I DO NOT own Kingdom Hearts. Any lyrics I would normally put in the story itself will be listed as a title and artist in the Author's Notes for purposes of legality, etc etc. You guys get the drift.
Author's notes: I've been on hiatus ever since I got this job, and for that I apologize. Sometimes I do have a life and I did say I do this stuff for fun right? Unfortunately, I just happen to find video games more fun in my spare time.
I would like to thank Milxaliw for offering his help as my new beta! *cookie avalanche* His suggestions regarding setting and flashbacks have already been very useful to me in writing this.
I will post any and all lemons (sex scenes) to my other account on a different website for purpose of FF rules. I will provide further instruction and warning when/if I decide to write them.
Normally I do boyxboy and for that I suggest you take a look at my first (now complete) fanfiction titled "Seeking Promise" or my other fanfiction in the works I've decided to call "Arm's Length". I will be working on that alongside this one. If you seek yaoi goodness, you've clicked the wrong link in this case. Axel might make an appearance, but he will not be the star of the show.
As you may have read in a previous note in "Seeking Promise", Xion is very near and dear to my heart, so writing this will hit close to home for me. But, that is why I want to write it.
I dedicate this to my journey forward, mourning the person I was and stepping forward to become who I was meant to be. Xion and I were forgotten, but I hope she finds herself again like I did.
The day began like any other. It was Friday morning, and the sun was just beginning to paint Twilight Town a beautiful, hazy orange color at six in the morning. The birds began to warble just outside Roxas' open window and he hardly noticed, being totally asleep.
By his bedside sat a small nightstand on which he kept his phone on charge, a notebook, and his fish-themed lamp. At night the lamp cast fish-shaped shadows on the walls in shades of blue. The lamp was off now, but his phone, unfortunately, was not. The loud cawing of a rooster erupted from it with a ferocity that sent Roxas tumbling out of bed, wrapped in a cocoon of covers. The disturbance sent the bluebirds sitting on his window sill flying in all directions.
"Shiiiitt," Roxas mumbled groggily and sat up. He pressed his palm to his head and ran his fingers through his marigold spikes. Even after a long night of tossing and turning, the front of his hair always spiked skyward. He didn't much like it, but he was too lazy to attempt a fix anymore.
"Six am.." Roxas mused while his thoughts drifted back to his recurring dreams. He could never recall them accurately and it frustrated him to no end. All he ever remembered was a voice: a girl's voice, and although it was unfamiliar to him, it made him feel happy.
A blush spread over his cheeks and he chuckled to himself. The only problem was that the girls at school never talked to him.
He tried to imagine what her face looked like many times. In dreams it was as clear as day, but that all faded to a blur every morning when he awoke. Not knowing his 'mystery girl' didn't keep him from thinking of her and pretending to be with her on his lonelier nights, while he watched the fish on his walls swim in and out of his murky thoughts.
Roxas sighed and looked at the notebook collecting dust on his nightstand. He always hoped to write down things he remembered from the dreams, but nothing ever stuck long enough to pin down. All he had written on the first page was about the sad, sweet voice he heard reverberating in his head when he woke up, and that it only ever said his name over and over again.
He made his way downstairs and took a shower.
It had been three years since Sora released Roxas from his heart. At the same time, Roxas was finally released from the shackles of being Sora's nobody. He used to be an empty shell with no heart, and though he didn't feel any different now than before, he knew for sure that there was a heart beating in his chest. The circumstances of his release and Sora's whereabouts were lost to him, and he searched everywhere for his best friend Axel, but couldn't find him.
It was almost as if the whole thing was a passing dream and never happened, just like that girl...
Roxas got dressed and ate breakfast hurriedly before darting out the door for school.
He had parents now, a few close friends, and went to school like any normal teenager. There was no danger and no heartless to be seen. His keyblade never materialized anymore either. He took that as a sign that the worlds were now at peace.
He had just turned eighteen, and would soon graduate high school and enroll in a nearby university.
Everything was as it should be.
Roxas found himself in the schoolyard of Twilight High School before he realized he'd been walking for fifteen minutes. His feet instinctively knew all the streets and crosswalks he took to school.
He made his way over to the benches where he waited for the bell to ring every morning with his friends.
He couldn't help but notice he slight difference in Olette's behavior and the way she played with the hem of her skirt as he approached the trio.
"Hey man! Sup?" Hayner waved with two fingers from where he sat on the bench next to Pence, who was too preoccupied with his morning Krispy Kreme doughnut to say hello.
"Sup." Roxas grinned and sat down on the bench next to Olette.
Olette beamed up at him, "Hey Roxas."
Roxas opened his mouth to speak to Olette when Hayner interrupted them again.
"You still wanna go to the fair this weekend? We were gonna go as a group and get some of those big pretzels."
Roxas frowned a little in thought, then smiled sheepishly at the three of them, "Oh yeah, I forgot about that."
Hayner's brow creased in sudden frustration. His friend was quick to a hot temper, but Roxas paid him no mind because he knew it was all a front to look like a tough guy. In terms of brute strength, Roxas was really the stronger one and proved it during the town's annual "Struggle" match.
"You make other plans?"
Roxas shook his head, "Nah man, I'm still coming."
"Right on!" Hayner pumped his fist in the air. Normally, they'd bump forearms but being a couple of seats apart, Roxas just mimicked his movement.
"So, about that geography test today..." Olette cut in warningly. The shoulders of her friends immediately slumped.
She responded by shrugging, "Sorry guys, we just don't have much time to study. Remember last time, Roxas and Hayner both failed miserably and they made you do remedial study over the weekend before they let you take it again."
Hayner groaned audibly, "You really know how to ruin the mood, y'know?"
Pence spoke up for the first time since Roxas arrived, "Why can't chu act like one of those girls on TV?" Bits of pastry flew from his mouth as he spoke with a mouth full of doughnut.
"You mean those girls from the Playboy channels we always catch you watching?" Roxas added cheekily, to which the four of them laughed.
Olette blushed, but laughed it off and at her persistence, they studied until the bell rang for classes to start.
The day dragged on at a sluggish pace, but thanks to their study session, Roxas was sure he passed his geography test with flying colors.
After school the four friends met up again at the usual spot to discuss how they did on the test and to make plans for the fair the following day.
"We meet under the ferris wheel at seven. Got that?"
"...Roxas?"
"Huh?" He blinked up at a concerned Olette, then shoved his hands in his pockets and stepped back to distance her face from his.
"Right, I got it."
"I dunno Roxas, you don't look so good. You sure you're okay?"
"Yeah, I'm fine," he waved her off. "I'll see you guys tomorrow, okay?"
"Sure.." Pence nodded.
They said their goodbyes and parted ways for the walk home. Twilight Town was very small, and although they lived within walking distance of one another, the four lived in separate subdivisions.
On his way home, it started to rain in sheets, and Roxas had to duck under the awning of a nearby shop to keep from getting soaked.
He sighed, "What gives, the sun was out just a few minutes ago."
The rain seemed to come out of nowhere, leaving Roxas with the choice of either waiting it out in hopes of a short shower, or braving the rain and running home.
He sat down at one of the outdoor tables and cradled his head in his hands, trying to gather his thoughts.
Where did I think I could go? What a joke.
A chill ran down his spine. Every time he started to think about the past, he felt something hollow out in his chest. He remembered all too well how it felt to be completely helpless and stripped of his identity.
Best friends are supposed to be honest with each other! Who am I, Axel?
Finding out the truth doesn't always work out for the best!
I hardly know who I am! What is so wrong with wanting some answers?!
The tears welled up and crawled down his cheeks. Thankfully, the rain was a good excuse in case anyone were to ask.
He loved Pence, Olette, and Hayner. But they would never quite understand what he'd really been through, the struggles he'd faced in comparison to their normal lives in Twilight Town.
Everything was as it should be, but nothing would ever be the same now.
You'll forget me, but the memories themselves will never go away.
Roxas stood up suddenly and stumbled backwards over his chair, falling towards the ground.
But a pair of arms slid under his own from behind and caught him before he could hit.
He wheeled around to thank them, when his cobalt eyes met their match.
"Roxas?"
Flashback quotes from the series will appear here and there (as you just read), but I do not own the quotes or the franchise they come from. The big fans will recognize them. If you don't, that's okay too. However, if you don't know what a nobody is, etc. just PM me or Google it. It's hard to explain and I don't have time to do that within the confines of a story like this.
I'll try to upload chapters for this at the same time as "Arm's Length", just to be fair to those who like one story over the other and whatnot. As always, thanks for reading!