Anamnesis (noun) - recollection, in particular the remembering of things from a supposed previous existence.
I remember now.
Sunlight on a beautiful day. It streamed through the window, illuminating the large room and making it glow. It dappled the floor, casting patterns through the curved ramparts. It warmed the room's occupants, enveloping them, the essence of warmth and safety.
Right now it didn't matter.
"The children went into the chasm?" Elliot yelled.
The maid trembled where she was crouched on the orphanage floor, wringing her hands. She couldn't seem to meet his gaze.
"Y-yes," the maid said. "Even though it's completely forbidden!"
She was trying to shift the blame, make herself innocent even though the children were her responsibility. As an official House of Fianna caretaker, not to mention an indirect employee of the Nightrays, Elliot almost couldn't blame her for being afraid of the repercussions. Almost.
But there was no time to bother.
"Damn… we can't wait for Pandora," Elliot said. He spun on his heel. "Let's go, Leo!"
"Wait a sec… Elliot!" Leo said.
"I said let's go!"
Behind him, Leo muttered something under his breath and gave chase. Just as well. Leo had been Elliot's servant for several months now—it was about time he started learning how to follow orders instead of putting up an argument every time Elliot made a decision. Even if it was a rash, impulsive one, like running straight into the deadly, Chain-infested chasm. In this moment, at least, Elliot was grateful Leo didn't put up a fight. More important things were at hand.
What happened then?
"We managed to find them safe and sound."
Together, Elliot and Leo darted into the sunshine. Around them, the rocky slopes jutted a hundred feet into the air, closing around the orphanage like arms open for an embrace. As soon as the pair left Fianna and started down the nearest path, the cliffs blocked the sunlight. Long shadows fell. It was cooler here.
"You look that way," Elliot ordered. "I'll keep an eye out on this side."
"Be careful," Leo said, sounding distracted.
Of course it was dangerous out here. Chains ran wild in this area—at least, that's what Elliot had always heard. He half-expected Leo to stop him and remind him not to be reckless as soon as they lost sight of the orphanage, but the dark-haired boy was even more worried than he was. He knew these orphans, took care of them. He'd lived with them, up until a couple months ago.
Elliot worked his jaw. He wanted the children to be safe—of course he did—but they were like siblings to Leo. He didn't know how the boy would react if anything happened to them. To be honest, he didn't know what he would say if anything did go wrong. Comforting was not a skill he possessed. He still felt like a tactless oaf most of the time when talking to Leo anyway. At least his servant used the opportunity to make fun of him instead of getting offended.
Still. Elliot hoped the orphans were all right.
What happened then?
"It's embarrassing, but I slipped…"
The minutes waned. Elliot did his best to keep the same, stony expression even though his heart was racing faster with every passing second. It was too quiet out here. The air was still, without even a breath of a breeze to break it. All the rocks and cracked terrain made it hard to walk—and even worse, they made it hard to search. Every small outcrop or boulder could hide the form of a small child. Elliot found himself looking behind every single one, getting sidetracked, just needing to see behind each one. Like following bread crumbs.
"I hit my head and passed out."
"Elliot."
THAT'S NOT TRUE!
Elliot looked up. In his search, he had wandered farther from Leo than he meant to. Leo was standing several yards away, one hand on a rock wall, staring straight ahead. His spine was rigid. A shape lay beyond him. Two shapes.
I remember now…
Elliot froze. Neither of them moved for a long moment. A choking stillness hung over them, over the bodies of the two children. They lay in a large puddle of blood. Streaks and splatters marred their skin, seeped into every thread of their clothes. It stained their young heads. Something had run them through with a sharp weapon.
Dead.
Leo snapped out of his trance. With a gasp, he dashed straight for the children. Elliot jolted back to awareness. There was no sign of the attacker yet. He could be anywhere.
"Leo!" Elliot called, leaping after him.
"Helen!" Leo yelled.
Elliot caught sight of a third child, a girl, huddled behind a small outcropping of rock. She was curled up, clutching the sides of her head and drenched in tears. At Leo's voice, her head came up. She started bawling.
"Leo!" she whimpered.
Leo reached her and fell to his knees, grabbing her by the shoulders. "Helen, what happened here?"
"Jo-John started acting weird," Helen choked between sobs. "A-and then…"
And then?
Another shadow. Elliot's eyes caught the movement somewhere above where Leo and Helen crouched, atop a short cliff.
Two eyes. A void—the deepest, most velvety black void he had ever seen—and below it, a row of massive, curving teeth. Below the teeth was another child, although Elliot wasn't sure he could still call it that. The little boy's eyes were blank, his head tilted at a frightening angle, blood running down one cheek. Leo didn't see either of them.
Elliot's heart leaped to his throat. "Leo!" he roared.
And then…?
Before he could think, Elliot's hand was on his sword and his feet were moving. The creature saw him coming and zipped over the cliff's side, its giant tongue whipping from its mouth toward the unsuspecting figures below. Leo's head jerked up. Elliot drew his sword back to strike, adrenaline powering him forward. The creature was almost atop Leo. He had seconds.
And then…
What happened then?
"Close your eyes."
All at once, Elliot's mouth was full of blood. He wanted to choke and spit it out, but it was everywhere. The heavy smell enveloping his head. The slick layer on his coat, on his gloves, all along the blade of his sword. The same sword he had used to-
Ernest and Claude.
Vanessa.
Mother.
It all began to piece together. The little fragments of that day when he and Leo ventured out to find the children. Memories of his home on fire. Bits of nightmares, flashes of pain and panic and tears. It all strung together like a freak show side attraction. Except it was true.
They were in Isla Yura's mansion. It started coming back to him—the party had ground to a halt when the fire started, and the first poor servant who approached the red-cloaked figures lost his head to the sword, staining the ballroom floor with crimson.
A few feet away, Leo sat slumped against the stone bed where he had been lying a few minutes ago. How long had they been here? Elliot vaguely remembered running into this room to find his servant. To save him.
Then the memories had started. A voice was ringing through his head, and he could no longer tell if it was his own. Every image had a sudden, striking clarity that sunk to the pit of his stomach. He had seen it. He had seen everything.
"I am… an illegal contractor?" Elliot whispered.
Leo's head was bent. He was staring at the body between them—Elliot's mother. A fresh stab wound in her back. Elliot's blade stained halfway to the hilt.
Elliot looked at Leo, half-wanting an explanation, half-knowing he already had it.
"I am the Head Hunter?"
No answer. He didn't need one.
Everything was a lie. When he had looked for the seal and saw nothing, when he denied to Xerxes Break that he had anything to do with the killings downstairs, when he tried to pin the blame one someone else—anyone else—and tried to find a reason for the crippling nightmares. All of it, a lie.
"Don't watch. Don't think. Don't remember."
He remembered the name.
Wait.
Another memory—a different kind.
"Even if you remember what happened, there's nothing you can do to change it."
This was no time for despair.
That's right…
Isn't that what I told the brat myself?!
He couldn't forget. Not now.
With a roar, Elliot pulled back the sword and stabbed himself in the hand. Humpty Dumpty's voice withered with a screech, a shriek of pain. The agony of the crushed bones in his hand seared up his arm, but he was so angry. So enraged. He couldn't let it stop him now.
Not him. Not Elliot Nightray.
I remember now.
Humpty Dumpty, the Chain who had speared him through the chest when he leaped to defend Leo that morning outside Fianna. He could see his own blood splashing below him as he hovered off the ground, suspended by the Chain's razor tongue.
Everything else was a pain-racked blur. Humpty Dumpty had dropped him, and his limp body thumped to the rough stone left wondering what happened. He could recall Leo shouting at him—why did he always shout?—commanding him to speak the creature's name. Now, of all times. When a Chain was loose and it could kill Leo at any second.
But the way Leo said it was so urgent. And confusing. He almost had no choice but to stutter it out through the foreign blood trickling down his lips and out the corner of his mouth.
"Humpty Dumpty…?"
It was different this time.
"Humpty Dumpty…."
Elliot took a breath and looked up. There was only one way out of this damn situation. It would save Leo and spare the brat the weight of his life. It would also give him the power to decide how it ended. After living all this time under the deception of that wretched Chain, the despicable creature that brought him to his knees and defiled his honor as a Nightray. It was his turn.
"I reject you."
I'm sorry, Leo.