It was mere weeks after Diana was born that Hippolyta felt she had recovered enough to resume her duties as Queen of Themyscira, she couldn't manage everything just yet, horse-riding and any strenuous physical activities were still off limits but she could attend the senate and maintain the laws of the Island just fine. Mostly she just wanted to be with her baby; Diana required a lot of her attention and she was more than happy just to be with her when she wasn't needed by her people. Everyone on the Island adored their new princess but Hippolyta was fiercely protective of her in those early days and had only let the baby be taken outside of the palace walls once so far.
She was fairly sure everyone had heard the news that their Princess had been born by now, there had been many celebrations after her birth and she had received many congratulations for bringing the little girl into their world. There was one person however who hadn't given their blessings, one person who may not even be aware of the child's birth. Philippus.
Hippolyta and Philippus had been lovers in the years before they came to Themyscira, before the revolt against man, before Diana. The amazon had loved the queen fiercely but there had always been something between them that kept their relationship under strain, Hippolyta's desire for a child. When she had fought at her side during the rebellion Philippus would have gladly laid down her life to protect the queen so afterwards, when she found out about Hippolyta's affair with Zeus she felt betrayed beyond imagine. To say she was heartbroken would be an understatement; Philippus became a broken woman after that, so much so that when they had arrived on Themyscira she had isolated herself from her sisters, choosing to live far away from the main city, far away from the palace and far away from the queen.
There were few that knew where she had hidden herself, and even less that could be exact about it, despite this Hippolyta had written many letters to her during her pregnancy and sent messengers to deliver them.
No reply ever came
"You should leave it be Hippolyta, it's useless". Antiope had said to her sister after she had sent another letter off with no hope of a reply.
"Would you? If it was Menalippe?" was the Queens curt reply.
After Diana was born Hippolyta decided that enough was enough, if Philippus wouldn't reply to her in writing then there was no other way to go about it, it was harsh, but she had sent out a group of her guards with instruction to bring Philippus to her, "Find her and bring her to me, by force if necessary" was her strict command.
This was exactly how Philippus ended up being escorted out on to the queen's private balcony one bright afternoon. Hippolyta had been out there for hours, rocking Diana to sleep in a basket while she hummed lullabies to her. When she heard her guards arrived she stood expectantly and somewhat nervously to meet them.
Philippus glanced around at her surroundings, looking anywhere but at her queen. She had never even been inside the palace before and now she was being taken there against her will, forced to see a woman she had once loved but now hated. She could barely contain her anger as dared to lay eyes on her Queen again and she seethed inside as she saw the small basket on a table next to her. "So, the child has been born" Philippus thought to herself, not bringing herself to look at it again, she had no desire to see the result of the queen's affair.
"Philippus…" the queen said softly, she hadn't seen her in so long and she was trying desperately to control her feelings for the dark skinned amazon. She remained at a distance for now though, all too aware of the remaining guards that had brought the woman to her.
"Leave us" Hippolyta said to her guards and they all quickly filed out leaving the two women alone on the balcony. It was obvious to the Queen that the other amazon had been keeping up with her training despite being isolated from the other warriors; she looked wonderful, as beautiful as Hippolyta had remembered her.
"How are you? You look well" Hippolyta said to her, trying to ease the tension that was so thick in the air.
Philippus though was in no mood for pleasantries, "You summoned me my queen and now I'm here. Please say what you need to say to me, I have no wish to stay any longer than required". She said flatly, confirming to the queen that she was only here due to brute force.
Hippolyta sighed; she was not going to make this easy for her at all, though it was probably what she deserved after everything she had put her through. "I didn't want it to be like this, but you wouldn't see me otherwise".
"So you used your power as queen to force me here?" Philippus spat, "Like a slave? Don't you remember we fought our way out of slavery?"
"Philippus, please…" Hippolyta beseeched her
"Do not beg to me 'Lyta" Philippus growled as she clenched her fists, very nearly overstepping her mark by using the pet name she had once used in happier times, though with the past they had shared there was little need to worry about formalities.
"You're right, this isn't the way…" She said ringing her hands, it was so unusual for her to be so flustered like this, but seeing her love again after all this time was having a strange effect on her. "There are so many things I needed to tell you in person, I need to apologise for hurting you the way I did. There were things I wanted that you couldn't give me, but that wasn't your fault. I shouldn't have pushed you away like I did. The pain I caused you…it was unforgiveable"
"Yes, it was". Philippus said, folding her arms across her chest
"I've missed you" Hippolyta told her, hoping that would break through the armour she had obviously built up inside of her. "I've had a lot of time to think about how things were between us, and how we left things after…." She didn't finish that part of her sentence, knowing that her tryst with Zeus was what hurt Philippus the most. "I need you to know that I've never stopped thinking about you. You're still in my heart Philippus"
"Is that all?" The amazon said, fixing her with a fierce gaze
"No…I need to know why you left the way you did, you were needed here by your sisters, they still need you, you're strength and your skill, why have you've lived in exile all this time?" Hippolyta asked in desperation
"You know why" she said, squaring up to her queen "You didn't want me"
"Phil..." Hippolyta whispered, trying to take her former lovers face into her hands to show her how she felt.
"Stop!" she barked, batting her away with more force than she should have allowed. "Stop this! You made it clear all that time ago what you wanted and it wasn't me. I was never enough for you Hippolyta, You tore what we had apart with your obsession to have a child, you couldn't think about anything else and Zeus took advantage of that, you let him seduce you. I fought at your side against man, I bled for you, I loved you but you went to him afterwards and he used you for his gain. I left because of that betrayal, how could you think I would just stay by your side and watch you grow thick with his child?"
"I…..I had no choice" Hippolyta said, tears forming in her eyes.
"You weren't forced into his bed Hippolyta. I know you went willingly". Philippus reminded her, not looking at her, not wanting to see her tears.
"He was never gentle with me as you always were" The queen told her
"Spare me the details 'Lyta" Philippus growled at her through gritted teeth
"I did go by own will, I admit that. But how could I say no to the Gods?" Hippolyta told her, regaining some confidence. "Zeus was dying. He needed a weapon and he knew I wanted a child, it was the only way to keep us protected".
Philippus allowed some tears of her own to fall, she knew it was all true. She was so angry at her former lover but she knew in her heart that she was right; the Gods demanded a weapon and Hippolyta had to submit. He could have asked it of any of the Amazons and they would have allowed him to take their body, but that knowledge didn't diminish her pain, or take away the fact that he stole her lover away from her. There was no one left for her to direct her anger at except for Hippolyta and maybe that was unfair to the queen but it was the only way Philippus could reconcile her feelings about everything that had happened.
"I had to do what he asked of me" Hippolyta told her "I did it for us, for all of us, to ensure our survival".
Philippus turned from her, wiping her eyes and looking out to the sea. She had lived in the dense forest for so long she had almost forgotten what the sea looked like. The view from where they were now really was breath-taking; it made Philippus forget her pain for a moment. Neither of them spoke for a good while, but Hippolyta watched Philippus intently, wishing she knew what she was thinking. She wanted to step forward to her and comfort her, but thought better of it, it was best to give her space to think right now.
When finally Philippus spoke they weren't words that Hippolyta had expected to hear. "This is a quite a view" she said
"Yes…" Hippolyta confirmed, confused at the comment.
"Do you remember when man had us shackled in a dungeon" Philippus continued, still not looking at her "We slept sitting up against each other, you and me, Antiope and Menalippe, confined in one cell, the chains digging into our flesh".
"I can never forget" The Queen told her sadly
"And you freed us from all of that" Philippus reminded her
"I led you; we all played a part in the revolt". Hippolyta added
"I loved you so much" the other woman said, bringing the conversation back to the subject at hand
"I know" Hippolyta said, tears falling down her face
"And I've been so angry at you" Philippus admitted
"I know" Hippolyta repeated
There was another pause as the amazon took in everything her queen had said to her. "Tell me, was it all worth it?"
Hippolyta closed her eyes and took a deep breath. That was a question she couldn't lie about, she would never deny that having Diana was the best thing that had ever happened to her. She loved her daughter more than anything; she was so precious. She looked over at the basket where Diana was sleeping peacefully, unaware of the drama unfolding around her, then she looked back at her former lover.
"I don't regret what I did, having a child is wonderful" Hippolyta told her with every conviction she had
"Then I suppose you did the right thing, all things considered" Philippus said, turning to face her again. "
Hippolyta stepped closer to her, "I never stopped loving you, the only regret I have is all the pain I've caused you"
Phillipus reached out to Hippolytas face, stroking it gently with her fingers, wiping away a tear with her thumb. "'My Queen…."she said softly, tears falling down her own face
"Can you ever forgive me?" Hippolyta asked her,
Philippus looked at her, really looked at her for the first time she had been in her presence again, without all the anger that had been simmering under the surface. "You are so beautiful" she said, to which Hippolyta gave her a small sad smile. And then Philippus closed the gap between them, kissing her softly. "I love you 'Lyta" she whispered. "I forgive you". And then they began kissing even more passionately, grasping each other as if no space could be between them.
"I love you, please come back to me" Hippolyta begged her between kisses, "I need you, I ache for you"
Philippus broke away from her lips and looked deep into her lover's eyes, she needed one more thing from her queen before she relented. "Promise me you'll love me for all my days" she declared.
"I will, I do. Always" Hippolyta said, smiling at her lover and taking her face into her hands.
As if on cue little Diana gave a tiny cry from her basket, announcing that she was awake and wanted her mother. Hippolyta looked around at the basket and smiled, she had almost forgotten the child was there amongst all this turmoil. She wiped the last of her tears from her eyes and gave a small relieved laugh before turning back to the other woman.
"Philippus, would you like to meet my daughter?" she asked her
"I would like that very much" the amazon replied, kissing Hippolyta on the forehead
"Come…" Hippolyta said as she took Philippus by the hand and lead her over to wear Diana was resting in her basket. "Here, sit" she instructed her as she put her hands around the tiny little bundle that was awaiting her attention.
"Hello my darling" Hippolyta said to the baby as she picked her up "I'm glad you're awake now. I want you to meet someone very special" she said as she gently placed her daughter into Philippus's arms. "Her name is Diana"
Philippus took the baby and gazed at her intently for a moment as she settled in her arms, she thought it would be difficult to feel anything for this child but it was obvious to her that she was a very special little girl. She smiled at the baby as she allowed herself to fall in love with her and she wondered how anything could possibly be so small and as perfect as she was.
"Oh 'Lyta…she's beautiful" she said after what seemed like an age of just looking at her. Hippolyta smiled a knowing smile and sat down next to the two of them. "I think she has your eyes, and your nose too a little". She stroked the little girls cheek softly with her finger, and leaned in to kiss her forehead. "You beautiful little girl" she spoke to Diana.
The two women spent the rest of that day getting reacquainted with each other and rediscovering what they had loved about each other whilst Philippus bonded with Diana. "Is that a smile for me?" she asked at one point when she was sure Diana looked up at her with her gorgeous brown eyes and smiled.
Apart from when she had to hand her over to be fed or have a nappy change Philippus didn't put her down until it was time to put her in her cot for the night. Hippolyta led her to her bedchamber where the cot was kept in one corner close to her mother's bed, and Philippus placed her down gently. "Sleep well Princess, may the Gods bless your dreams" she said as the baby yawned and closed her eyes.
Philippus stood over the cot, stroking the child's little face as she settled down to sleep when she felt Hippolyta's arms wrap around her waist. She placed a gentle kiss onto Philippus's neck as they both looked down at the sleeping baby and Philippus felt happier then she'd felt in a long time, the anger and sorrow had been eating away at her for so long it was as if she had forgotten how to be happy, but feeling Hippolyta's arms around her and watching that beautiful little baby as she slept made her finally feel at peace again.
"Will you come to bed with me?" Hippolyta whispered to her, to which Philippus replied the only words she wanted to hear
"It would be a pleasure my Queen"