Title: Dance of the Bees
Type: One-shot/ Humour
Summary: Professor Dogwood (head of Care of Magical Creatures) has a weird way of teaching - turning his students into the animal, so the can 'be the animal'. Lily/James, 6th year.
Disclaimer: Okay... Stuff you recognise JK Rowling's. Stuff you don't mine.
Professor Dogwood was a litte bit eccentric. He believed that the only way to learn about an animal was to 'be the animal', and well... Magic assisted with this. You get the picture. However, today he realised that he needed to do something different. Not having a great imagination, but lots of magical knowledge, he quickly devised something that he thought would make it all better...
"Okay. Now I know that you are all tired and still bruised from all of the other 'excursions' of mine, so I have devised something that will let everyone have the experience, but only two of you get the bruises."
The class sighed, and started to back away. They didn't want to be the one to have another visit to the hospital wing. However, Professor Dogwood was completely unaware of this, as he had failed miserably in the field of psychiatry. Left standing forward were the two most headstrong students in the year - Lily Evans and James Potter. Of course, they were going out at the current time, but they still had their differences.
"YOU TWO!" Shouted the professor. "YOU will be the two that will be turned into... BEES!" The class was taken aback.
"Aren't bees part of muggle studies?" Asked Sirius Black.
"YES, but there are still some undiscovered mysteries about bees that you are yet to discover!" He shouted. The professor's glasses became magically lopsided to coincide with his feelings.
"I'm weird, but he's eccentric", muttered Remus Lupin. A friend near him acknowledged this, and added that if Lily and James both came out alive Remus owed him 5 galleons and a sugar quill. Remus shook on it.
Meanwhile, Professor Dogwood had not missed a thing. Ignoring the comment, he had already pronounced the secret spell that, if known to students, would cause havoc wherever the marauders went.
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"Hey! I'm a bee! This is YOUR fault, James."
"What? All I did was say..."
"Yes. You said something."
"Lily, I thought we were through with the arguing. Let's be good witches and wizards and stop this, please?"
"Yes - good witches and wizards. I'M A BEE!"
"So am I. What a strange coincidence", remarked James with a hint of sarcasm.
"Whoop-Te-Doo" Retorted Lily. "You PROMISED. You PROMISED that you wouldn't do anything stupid."
"Did I?"
"YES!"
"Oh. When exactly was that?"
"Last week, behind the one-eyed statue."
"Oh... that..."
"HEY! WE ARE ON A LEARNING EXPERIENCE, NOT A PERSONAL ONE!" Shouted the professor.
"How can he hear us? James! Answer me, you moron!"
"I CAN HEAR YOU BECAUSE YOU ARE TALKING!" The professor boomed.
"Oh."
"So what do we do? What is the great mystery about bees?"
"FIND OUT!"
"How?"
"GO MEET YOUR FRIENDS, CHILDREN!"
"Bee friends?"
"YES! IT'S NOT THAT HARD TO WORK OUT!"
"What bee friends?"
"OH - JUST GO TO THE BEEHIVE. WE'LL BE FOLLOWING YOU. AND DON'T TALK... LOUDLY."
Lily and James nodded vigorously. They didn't want their love-life to be exposed in full detail to all those they hate. They buzzed up to the local beehive, not that they knew where they were going - it was instinct.
James cleared his throat. "Uh... Hi?"
Every bee looked his way. It was then that Lily leaned into his ear (wherever it was) and whispered, "Bees don't communicate through sound. They communicate through dancing."
"And you didn't tell me this earlier because?"
"You never asked." They looked back to the outside world, and saw the entire class, clothed in anti-sting clothes, peering into the hive. "So let's boogie."
James was taken aback. "You're asking me? Aren't I supposed to ask you?"
"You snooze, you lose." The two new bees had appeared at the door, dancing the worst insult possible. The others, who all knew each other intimately, were not going to be fooled or abused.
Lily turned around, noticing the building anger, then shouted in the loudest voice her bee-self could handle, saying, "JAMES! YOU'RE DANCING AN INSULT! RUN FOR IT!" SORRY - FLY/BUZZ/GET OUT OF HERE AS FAST AS YOU CAN!"
"NO KIDDING!" James shouted back, already outside. Once they were both away from the havoc, he continued. "What did we just do?"
"We?" Lily asked, "YOU just danced an insult. I was dancing welcoming."
"How do you know this?"
"Listen to Professor Dogwood next time." Lily smiled.
By that time, everyone had gathered around. Professor Dogwood became the spokesperson. "You know what? I think we'll stay inside today."
Lily and James beamed. The Professor then changed them back to normal. Well - almost normal. You know what happens to those that save each others lives? They have to pay the other one back. In this case, Lily had saved James's life by telling him to stop dancing. So...
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A few days later...
"Can I pay you back?"
"For saving your life? Yes."
"Can I go out with you?"
"You are."
"Oh - yeah. Forgot about that. Will you go to the dance with me?"
"For you to pay me back? You want me to want you to dance with me?"
James nodded.
Lily pretended to think about it. "Why not? But if you step on my feet, you're history."
A/N: Hey hey! My first story! (not). I used to be Lily4James, but then I forgot the email that I was using, as well as my password. So now I'm green-one. Please, please, please, please, PLEASE review this story. Good feedback, bad feedback... I can take it. Seriously. Please? Little button. Click.