I sigh contentedly, looking down at her face and smiling. She's so beautiful, innocent and pure, that I wonder how she could have been brought into a world so cruel. I don't know how she endures as much pain as she does. She goes through things that would be too much for me to take, yet she can still love. She's been put through things no six-year-old should ever have to go through, and no person should either. I look out from our idyllic spot near to top of the mountain, and think of everything it took to get up here. The times she begged for a rest but I wouldn't allow it, when she feel and scraped her knee on a rock, when she bent down to take a closer look at a lizard resting on a tree branch, and when we got to this spot and she hugged me and told me she loved me. She was so tired that once we had put down our packs I sat down and she laid in front of me and rested her head gently on my lap and slept. She's been still like this for almost an hour, and a small smile spreads across her face as I watch. I look out at the view from our spot near the top of the mountain and think. Cato brought me here when I was just a bit older than her, and I remember he took me right up to the mountaintop. I'm going to take her up there tomorrow. She'll like it.
"Clove?"
"Yeah, Sas?"
"Can we go for a swim in the river?"
"After we set up everything; then we can go for a swim."
"OK then, let's get started."
She jumps up and opens her pack, and I follow and open mine, pulling out the tent and laying everything out. While we set it up, I think about last night. About Cato and Leroy coming over and taking us back to their house to look after us after our parents lost control. We decided to disappear into the mountains for a few days, and we left this morning. We quickly set up the tent and unroll our mats and sleeping bags, and get changed into our swimming gear. We grab our towels and head off to the river, and Saskia jumps off a rock into the still pool. I follow, and we swim around for a bit, until I get a bit curious.
"Sas, I wanted to ask you something."
"What?"
"What would you do if something happened to me?"
"Like what?"
"Well, what if I went into the Games and didn't come back out?"
"I don't know. I'd want something that was always with me to remind me of you."
I pause for a moment, wondering if she's ready for what I'm thinking of. "Come over here. I want to do something."
I get out of the pool and go to the tent and rummage around in my bag for a minute before returning to find Saskia sitting on a rock with her feet dangling in the water.
"What did you want to do, Clove?"
"Give me your arm, and stay very still. It's going to hurt, but I think you're ready. Just say if you don't want to."
She tentatively holds out her arm, and I show her the knife. She flinches away, but I hold her arm tightly, and rest my other hand on her shoulder.
"It's going to be fine, Sas," I say. "I'm not going to hurt you. You do trust me, don't you?"
"Yes, but I don't want to get hurt."
"It will hurt, but I'll make it better I promise. And you can do the same to me afterwards, OK?"
"OK," she says quietly.
I slowly lower the knife to her arm and wait for a second, making sure she's fine with it, before beginning. I carefully trace a C on her upper arm, and repeat it until it's deep enough to scar. She doesn't yell though, just gasps a bit. When I'm finished, I clean the blade and hand it to her.
"Do whatever you want," I say, holding out my arm for her.
She looks down at her own and smiles, then turns to mine. "Your turn," she says with a smile.
She slowly carves what feels like an S into my upper arm, and it's quite painful, but not unbearable. I can tell she's being very careful, and when she hands the knife back to me, I look at my arm and see a perfect S carved into my arm. I take a cloth and dip it in the water and clean my own arm, and then carefully clean hers. I wrap a bandage around her arm, and get her to do the same for me, and then we sit together contentedly.
"I love you."