AN: This is a REMAKE of THE Talk: Prologue. I didn't like the way it turned out the first time... so I'm taking that one down and replacing it with this. Um... enjoy! *makes "V is for victory sign*

Disclaimer: PJ IM SORRY! I DIDN'T KNOW U HAD A STORY LIKE THIS ONE! Lucas owns the characters.

THE Talk: Prologue (take 2)


Anakin's mind wandered from his studies yet again. Obi-Wan noticed that lately... Anakin had become... distracted. Something was obviously on the young Padawan's mind... yet he was very hesitant to talk about it. Obi-Wan watched from the lounging room of their temple quarters as Anakin sighed exasperatedly once again, and deleted, what looked to be, the same math equation he had been working on, for the 5th time. Obi-Wan raised an eyebrow. "What is wrong with that boy?" The Jedi wondered aloud. Obi-Wan shrugged and turned his attention back to the holo-vid he had been watching.

As if on cue, a frustrated growl and smack, smack, smack... was heard coming from the kitchen.

Obi-Wan sighed, and got up to see what was wrong.

He stopped in the doorway and smiled in amusement at what he saw.

There sat 13-year-old Anakin Skywalker, banging his head repeatedly on the kitchen table, muttering choice curses in Hutese. "Poo-doo...Poo-doo... POO-DOO"

Obi-Wan tried not to laugh, and let out a sputtering noise. Anakin stopped hi s banging and cursing and looked up at his Master with a scowl. "Hello, Master." He said sullenly, believing he was going to get, yet ANOTHER, lecture on watching his mouth. Instead he found Obi-Wan sitting next to him with a small smile on his face.

"Anakin... lately you've seemed very distracted," He smiled wider and raised an eyebrow. "Care to tell me what's wrong?"

Anakin wasn't the kind of guy who asked a lot of questions... he usually did most of the explaining... but Anakin was curious... Ever since Jaileh and Rodster had told him about... IT... he had wondered what IT was all about. Jaileh didn't know, and neither did Rodster. And HE certainly didn't know what IT was...

Anakin flushed deeper. Well ok... he knew what IT was... but he didn't know... HOW it worked or... what led up to IT... he just knew what IT WAS. Anakin looked at the floor. "Ok, Ani" he said in his head, "You can ask Obi-Wan... he's your Master... you're SUPPOSED to ask him, right?" Anakin looked back up at Obi-Wan who stared at him with concerned eyes.

RIGHT?!

Anakin sighed, took a deep breath and looked down at the floor again. "Master..." Obi-Wan gulped. Whenever Anakin used: Master... it wasn't a good sign. "Master... I've been talking with my friends a lot lately, and we've been wondering about s-s-s-se-s-se-se-seee-seee" Anakin stuttered uncertainly. Obi-Wan began to flush. "Sedatives, Padawan?" he silently prayed that's what it was and not...

"We've been wondering about... sex."

Obi-Wan moaned inwardly and flushed to the tips of his ears.

Ok, Obi-Wan KNEW that this discussion would come up at one point. He just didn't WANT it to come up. The Jedi Master ran a hand through his hair and sighed.

"Ok Anakin... se-se-se..." He sighed and tried again. "Sex is when a man and a woman who love each other very much..." Anakin started. "I KNOW THAT!" the flustered Padawan burst out. Obi-Wan raised both eyebrows and looked at his Padawan fully. "Anakin?" The teenager sighed. "What I want to know is... like what leads up to it... and what does it feel like? How do you know what to do..." Obi-Wan let his mouth hang open.

This would be a long discussion.

Obi-Wan sighed and ran a hand through his, now slightly longer, hair. "Ok, Padawan... what would be your first question?" His face turned red slightly... damn hormones and sex education... why can't they just teach this stuff in school?

Anakin visibly fumbled for words. He looked down and up again, then again, and again... then opened his mouth. "Uh... erm..." He mumbled the rest. Obi-Wan raised an eyebrow. "Anakin? What was that?" Anakin sighed, and spoke louder. "Um... how do you know when a girl... WANTS you to... um.... You know..."

Obi-Wan gulped. How was he going to explain this?

Just when things were getting bad... they got a tad worse.

The intercom buzzed.

Obi-Wan looked at Anakin and held up one finger, then ran to the door and hit the speak button. "Who is it?" he asked irritably... he wasn't in the mood to deal with anyone right now... at least not while he was giving THIS talk to his Padawan. He glance back at Anakin. The child was blushing intensely and twiddling his thumbs. Obi-Wan groaned. He REALLY didn't want anyone around while he was giving this talk.

"Master Kenobi? It's Master Windu... may I come in?"

Obi-Wan groaned. Of all people he REALLY didn't need WINDU... the bad mother f*cker Jedi Master... listening in on his discussion with Anakin. "Um... Mace? Maybe another..." Obi-Wan didn't get to finish his sentence... Mace Windu had reached out with the force and opened the door.

While in the Council chambers, Mace was a highly respectable Jedi Master... wise and cautious. But that was in the presence of the Council... while he was "chilling," as he put it, with Obi-Wan or any of his "homies," as he put it, he was a different person... cussing and drinking... pretty much "getting his groove on," as he put it.

Obi-Wan plastered a smile on his face and put his mind barriers up... then sent a mental message to Anakin to do the same. The young boy looked up, panicked at the sight of the Jedi Master, and put his shields up quickly. "Good afternoon, Master Windu." Anakin said brightly, as he stood and bowed. Mace smiled. "Good afternoon, Padawan Skywalker." He turned to Obi-Wan. "Hello, Obi-Wan, I just came to check up on Anakin... you know see how he's doing... Yoda was ranting about it again today."

Mace flung his cloak on a near-by chair and flopped onto the couch. Obi-Wan sighed, knowing that Mace wasn't going anywhere and sat down on a lounge chair, motioning for Anakin to join them. Anakin, who was considerably paler, sat on the floor, and listened to the two Jedi Masters... praying that Mace wouldn't find out that they were talking about... what they were talking about.

"That little elf drives me out of my mind sometimes, Kenobi. Full of fear this young boy is, fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate... blah blah blah!" He turned to Obi-Wan. "If I hear that speech one more time, I'll take that walking stick from him and beat him over the head with it." Mace turned to Anakin, who was now blushing again. Mace raised an eyebrow, and Obi-Wan gulped nervously.

"You're not scared, are you boy?" Mace asked Anakin. "Uh... not about being a Jedi?" Mace smirked, and tried to reach out with the force. Anakin's shields, which were put up too fast and too shaky, fell quickly and Mace was able to probe Anakin's mind to see what was troubling him. He found what was bugging Anakin. And he laughed.

Long.

Anakin blushed and glared at the older Jedi.

Obi-Wan tried not to laugh, and placed an angry look on his face.

After Mace was done laughing he turned to Obi-Wan. "You're trying to explain sex to the kid?" Mace wiped a tear from his eye. Obi-Wan blushed. "Well if you're not up to it... I..."

"NO!" shouted Obi-Wan and Anakin at the same time.

It had been rumored that Mace knew his way around women, and when talking about it with his friends... he was tactless... Obi-Wan knew this to be a fact, and didn't want Anakin to get the wrong idea and scare the wits out of the girl he had his eye on... especially since the girl he had his eye on was a queen.

Mace chuckled, and turned to Anakin. "Alright, but I'm not going anywhere... I would pay BIG credits to hear Kenobi," he jerked a thumb in Obi-Wan's direction, "Talk about THIS with YOU." He laughed and turned to Obi-Wan. "Especially since you're really shy about it." Mace leaned back further on the couch and placed his feet on the coffee table.

Obi-Wan glanced around. Mace and Anakin were staring at him, waiting to start. "Uh..." Obi-Wan stammered. Mace laughed. "Ok, Anakin... sex is..." Obi-Wan force smacked Mace. Mace glared at him and made an inappropriate hand gesture. Anakin laughed. "Ok Kenobi... just tell Anakin what Qui-Gon told you." Obi-Wan rolled his eyes and leaned back in the lounge chair. "Ah... I don't think that's a good idea." Mace chuckled. "Oh yeah Qui-Gon told me all about this little encounter. The older Jedi laughed. Obi-Wan blushed. "OK! FINE!"

Obi-Wan took a deep breath and began.

TBC

Ok I think that was better.

Soon to come: FLIRTING!