This is my first time writing since high school. That is a long time ago. Lol Let me know if you like it.
Preface
Bella has been passed back and forth between Jacob and Edward for her safety. She is torn between her undying love for Edward and her constant hunger for her sunshine Jacob. Both hate that she has to spend time with the other but both know it is the only way to keep her safe from Victoriafor now. After it came to lightthe things Bella did during the time Edward had stupidly left her for her own safety Carlisle concerned, has been looking into the very few and brief documented vampire/human relationships. He has discovered that Bella may be addicted to Edwards venum. He also has a theory that she is also addicted to Jacob's pharomones. No matter how careful Edward is a small amount of his venum has been passed to Bella through their heated kisses. Carlisle believes removing both from her would be fatal. Edward has convinced himself that being with both while they Jacob and Edward hate each other will mean a life of unhappiness for Bella. Edward decides he must do something before they tear her apart. Her happiness is what matters most to him. She can have what ever she needs even if it is puppies.
Chapter 1
After a long night of endless night mares Bella again wakes screaming. Her reaccuring dream of being stalked by Victoria grasping to first Edward then Jacob only to have them disappear. Her head swirling with confusion terror and need. Edward gently holds her and reminds her he is there and will let nothing hurt her. She snuggles into him and drifts back off to sleep. He is not happy that she has been yelling Jacob's name in the night in addition to his own. After what Carlisle told him today he has decided to give her to Jacob and leave for ever. He just wants her to be happy and living like this is torturing her. She deserves happieness. Jacob can protect her. Jacob loves her. Jacob can give her what she wants. Something Edward is afraid to try.
Today he is going hunting and Jacob will be here to pick her up shortly he will need to go quickly. Bella's eyes flutter open and catch the dark look on Edwards face. "What is wrong Edward?" He bends down and kisses her passionately making her breath come in great gasps. Her eyes flutter and she clings to him desperate for something more. Something he won't give her. Edward suddenly pushes her away. Angry with himself he never meant to do that. He is making this worse. She will have a horrible withdrawl but he knows Jacob can make her happy. Bella looks up confused what is wrong Edward? She could see the torture in his eyes. She has seen that before. Fear gripped her center where that hole was still scarred. Bella starts to shake & in a sob she says "No Edward." Edward looks down at her and in a pained voice says. "I love you Bella but I can't give you what you want. Jacob loves you…. Bella" " No Edward please I love you". "I know Bella but I can't watch you torn between us. I want you to be happy to have someone who can fulfill your every need and want without fear. Someone you can have children with." At this point Edward knew it was now or never. He crushed Bella to him one last time while she sobbed. He quickly stood having to push her away and left. He could hear her screaming but he was sure she would go to Jacob and after some time heal and be happy. Edward took off in a run Bella's screams ecoing in his ears.
Bella was left alone she felt like she her heart had been torn from her body. She screamed and screamed but Edward would not come back. She knew she had caused this it was her fault for torturing the two men she loved with her heart and soul. She was the monster not them. Why couldn't she be happy with just one. Why when she was away from one did she she feel a tearing need for them. Bella had no idea she was addicted to them she thought there was just something wrong with her and she was causing both of them all this pain. In her mindless insanity Bella felt she had only one choice. Edward was right she should be away from them both. She pulled on some clothes and headed for her truck. She knew Jacob was coming soon and did not want deal with him she knew what she had to do.