Deathmatch:Anime style!







The screen comes on and we see Goku and Vegeta sitting in the announcers booth.

Goku picks up his microphone and starts talking.

"Hello ladies and gentleman,and welcome to Anime deathmatch.Im Goku son....."

"And im Vegeta"

"And tonight we're bringing you three huge fights involving your favorite nonexistent celebrities. The first fight is between Piccolo and Garlic Jr for the title of..........Baddest ass Namek ever!"

"Our second bout is between Master Roshi and Relena peacecraft"

"Apparently Master Roshi has made one too many jokes about her name and she's out for revenge"

"And our Main event is between two of the most famous anime teams ever,The Sailor scouts VS. The Gundam wing pilots"

"We go now to ring where the first fight is about to begin"

The death match ring is surrounded by a huge stadium,probably large enough to fit 100,000 people.In the center of the ring is Mills Lane and in opposite corners are Garlic Jr and Piccilo.Mills motions for the two to come to the center of the ring.

"Ok fellas,I want a good clean fight,and try to keep collateral damage to a minimum.Now lets get it on!"

The two combatants run out of their corners and start punching each other rapidly.

Garlic Jr unexpectedly grows to his full size and knocks Piccolo to the other side of the ring.Looking sort of looney Garlic Jr grabs hold of the semi-conscious Piccolo and bites off his arm.Piccilo leaps up and runs around the ring in pain.Garlic Jr smiles.He readies himself and charges at Piccolo again.As he is about to hit Piccilo,His opponent manages to regenerate the bitten off arm and punch forward with the fist.Piccilos attack hits Garlic Jr right in the face.Piccilo grabs with his hand Garlic Jrs skull and pulls his opponents whole Skeleton out through his mouth.Garlic Jrs body,lacking in a skeleton,falls on the floor like a pile of Jello,and he Dies.

Mills lane comes forward and raises Piccilos arm.

"Piccolo is the winner!"

The screen goes back to Goku and Vegeta in the announcers booth.Goku looks Amazed.

"Wow that was a pretty cool fight"

"Yes it really came down to Piccilos Intelligence and mastery of the Regeneration technique."

"We go now to ringside for an interview of Piccolo with our Correspondent Kiyone!"

Kiyone walks up to Piccolo and sticks out the mike for him to talk into.

"That was Quite a Fight Piccilo,Everyone in the audience was very impressed"

Piccolo comes as close to smiling as is possible for Him.

"Thank you"

"So who do you think will win in the fight between The sailor scouts and the Gundam pilots?"

Piccolo gives an evil grin.

"I think they both are a bunch of pretty little wussies and I hope they all rot in the fires of blackest HFIL!"

Kiyone puts on a fake grin.

"Blackest HFIL! Back to you guys"

Goku gives another fake grin.

"Thanks Kiyone,Now the second fight of the night is about to begin!What caused this unusual match up Vegeta?"

"Well Goku the radio show that Master Roshi runs,............Whats its name?"

"Its called "Open mike perversion with Roshi"Vegeta,and one of Roshis biggest source of jokes is Princess Relena and her name.Apparently she has abandoned the total pacifism of her old ideology to challenge Master Roshi to this match."

"We go back to the ring"

In the ring Relena is in one corner and Roshi is in the other.Mills motions for them to come to the center of the ring.

"Ok I want a good clean fight,and no pacifism cause its against the rules.Now lets get it on!"

Relena wastes no time and bolts straight for Roshi.He moves to dodge but she kicks him in the groin.He falls over in pain.Relena shouts at him.

"Im gonna simonize your head you old pervert!"

With that she grabs him form behind and hangs onto his neck trying to strangle him.

"I want you to take back all the mean thinks you said about me and my Kingdom!"

Roshi struggles and trys to get away.

"Let me go,now or you'll be sorry"

Relena gives an angry grin.

"Not a chance!"

Roshi smiles.

"Ok then!"

Roshi Farts with huge velocity and blows Relena off his back and out of the ring.She breaks the ropes and lands in the crowd.She leaps up and charges back into the ring and starts beating Roshi senseless.Goku Grimaces

"Oh my God! Master Roshi cant take that kind of punishment for too much longer!"

"But that doesn't seem to be stopping the thousands of Rabid Roshi fans all around the arena,Their cheering him on,giving him strength!...."

Goku looks back at the ring

"Unfortunately hes still getting his ass kicked"

Roshis fans shout in the stands.

"Hes not gonna make it,hes losing"

Just then we notice Krillin standing in the crowd among Roshis supporters.He stands up with a megaphone.

"We can help Roshi win everyone!"

The crowd looks puzzled.

"How?"

Krillin grins.

"Will all the ladies in the arena please remove their clothes! Master Roshis life depends upon it!"

Within 30 seconds all Roshis female supporters have stripped off all their clothes and are shouting encouragement to Roshi.Presented with a complete overload of his Nasal arteries from the thousands of naked women within view,Master Roshis nose launches a veritable Tsunami of blood at Relena.She is drowned in the attack along with most of the people at ringside.Mills,covered in blood like everyone else,lifts up the arm of the Semi-conscious Roshi,who is still lying in the center of the ring.

"The winner is Mr.Roshi!"

Kiyone is Flabergasted.

"What an amazing show of support from Roshis loyal fans,Back to you guys.................Umm Vegeta,Goku are you there?"

Vegeta and goku are sitting with dopey looks on their faces.Vegeta speaks first.

"That is the Best finish to a fight ever!Lets see that again!"

The screen shows a replay of all the naked women.Vegeta gets all dopey again.

"Lets see that again!"

The replay shows again

"Lets see that again!"

It shows again

"Lets see that again!"

It shows again

"Lets see that again!"

It shows again and Kiyone says talks.

"But now we have to go to ringside for the next fight,Right?"

Vegeta looks unconvinced.

"Well I guess we have the tape of this,Right?I mean..."

Goku cuts in.

"So without further ado We go to ringside for the MAIN EVENT!"

In the red corner are the Sailor scouts Mercury,Venus,Mars and Jupiter aswell as their leader Sailor moon.In the Blue corner are the Gundam pilots Heero Yuy,Duo Maxwell,Trowa Barton,Wu Fei,and Quatre Winner.Mills motions them to the center of the ring.

"Ok I want a good clean fight.No stupid robots and no funny transformations allowed.Now lets get it on!"

The two groups all strike fighting posses.Sailor moon grabs her scepter and shouts to her group.

"Ok sailors,lets takedown these tin jockeys!"

They all say

"Right!"

In unison as always.

The Gundam boys all react differently.Wufei shouts something about the imorality of the weak fighting and charges straight for his opponents.He launches a flying kick and gets Mercury square in the gut.Heero says

"Im going to kill you"

then pulls out his gun and shoots once at Sailormoon taking off one of her meatball hair segments.Trowa shouts at him

"What are you waiting for you moron?Shoot her!"

Heero looks totally suprised.

"But im out of bullets! I never found out This gun only has a one bullet clip because I never fired it more then once in an episode."

Sailor jupiter doesnt give him a chance to recover,whacking him upside the head with her fist.Quatre runs around impotently and keeps shouting

"Cmon guys we've got to join forces!"

The whole fight stops for a second and everyone says

"STOP WHINNING FOR ONCE QUATRE!"

Then the fight goes on.Wufei gets ganged up on by Mars and Venus and they kick him repeatedly in the face.Trowa flies forward Jupiter and Hits her in the stomach with a kick that breaks her in half at the waist.Both halves falls on the mat and she gets annoyed.

"HEY,That really hurt!"

Mars and Venus work together and pull off Wufeis arms,but before they can do any further damage Duo and Quatre knock them to the other side of the ring.Both groups sort of form up in the opposite sorners ready to launch an all out assault.Without warning the ring vanishes in a rain of metal.Goku looks astonished.

"What the hell happened out there? OH my god this is so terrible,all those poor kids crushed under heaps of Jagged metal! Vegeta did you see what happened?"

Vegeta is still watching the tape of the Roshi matches conclusion on his monitor.

"Lets see that again! Lets see that again! Lets see that again! Lets see that again! Lets se...."

The screen cuts from the booth and we have Kiyone at ringside.

"Goku,the cameraman has a replay of what happened.Apparently the lighting rig fell!"

In the background we see Mills crawl out of the ring and stand up,with a number of metal objects sticking in him.Goku is shocked.

"How could it just fall like that,it doesnt make any sense!.............Wait,I think I see some movement up there! Get a camera on the cat walk,quickly!"

The camera zooms in on the cat walk and we see someone.Its Piccilo and hes still in the Machanppouo stance from the attack that dropped the Rig onto the ring.He sees the camera and Grins,then He flies down to ringside,next to Kiyone.She acts a little shocked but holds out the microphone for him to talk into.

"So Piccilo,Youve taken out the Sailor scouts and the Gundam pilots,what are you gonna do now?"

Piccilo Laughs aloud.

"IM GOING TO DISNEY WORLD!"

Kiyone falls over anime style and the camera is back on Goku.

"Well its been 3 great battles in a row,hopefully we'll get a second episode now.For Vegeta,Im Goku-Son,Saying good fight,good night!"



Play deathmatch music and credits.

"Hi this Goku-san,and Next episode we will have some more great fights for you,starting with Ryoki VS Luna the cat.Then its Zechs VS Traieze.Then it's the battle for cutest little girl between Sasami and Rini In the main event!"