MY DILEMMA
Chapter 01
It's been a week since Ron broke up with me. Two days since he started going with Lavender Brown, a girl, which is strange since Ron is supposed to be gay. I would know, I am his best friend and ex-lover after all. I glare at the pair of them, sitting at the other side of the Griffindor common room, cuddling together in the big cushy armchair that sits by the fire, the one Ron and I used to cuddle in after everyone else had gone to bed.
"Harry, stop it." Hermoine whispers.
I don't look away from them (that should be ME dammit!), and when I don't reply she goes on, "You're only giving him exactly what he wants you know."
This gets my attention, " What d'you mean 'I'm giving him exactly what he wants'?" I ask, turning toward her. Hermoine shuts the book that she had been reading and sets it aside before turning toward me, "Come on Harry, isn't it obvious?" She asks.
"No." Hermoine rolls her eyes, "Harry, has Ron ever expressed an interest in being with a female? Before now of course-" Harry thought back, but he couldn't recall a single conversation where Ron said he might like to do it with a girl. He could remember then laughing at the blokes who did, chasing after a girl like a puppy on a leash, they laughed about that loads of times. "Ah - no." I reply. Hermoine nods as if she had already known this, which she probobly did, "In other words, as far as you know, he's 100 percent gay. Am I correct?" I grudgingly nod my head, "Yes."
"So, if Ron is gay then why is he dating a girl that he has no sexual interest in? Any guesses?"
I think about what's she's said, and she's right. If Ron is gay he couldn't possibly be having sex with Lavender, but if he's not with her because he wants her like that then why is he with her? Feelings? No, Ron's too horny for that, I know from experience. Then why is he doing this? Maybe - to make me jealous? Could that be what he's doing? Trying to make me jealous? "But why would he do that when he's the one who broke up with me?" I ask aloud. "I dunno, Harry, but whatever his reasons are for making you jealous - he's obviously succeeded." Hermoine says, turning back to her book.
I look back at Ron and Lavender, now resenting the flood of jealousy that courses through me at the sight of them together. Suddenly, Ron looks pulls his head away from Lavender's shoulder and looks around the room and resting on me. Our eyes meet and even from across the room I can see his full lips pull up into a self-satisfied smirk. Gloatingly, he rests his head back on Lavender's shoulder, when he does she searches up and runs her fingers through his messy ginger hair. I struggle to keep a straight face when I see him smile, SMILE, at me before looking away.
"I'm going to bed." I growl, barely controlled rage coloring my voice, before I stand and make my way toward the stairs leading up to the dorms. When I get to my room, which I share with not only Ron but four other boys in my year, I yank the curtains around my bed closed so roughly that I'd be afraid they were going to tear if I weren't so mad. I don't bother changing into my night-clothes before flopping down onto my bed fully clothed.
Two hours later I hear Ron getting into his bed next to mine, even through the thick curtains separating us, and I know from the sound of his bed creaking that he's alone. He doesn't ask if I'm awake or check on me, but I keep my eyes closed anyway, just in case.
That night I toss and turn, my conversation with Hermoine playing over and over in my head and the look on Ron's face when he caught me watching him.
Ron wants to make me jealous, and Hermoine's right, he has succeeded. However, I think to myself, that doesn't me he's going to win; you'd better get ready, Ron, because two can play at this game. For the first time in a week, a smile spreads across my face. I turn over and finally fall asleep.