This one-shot just kept growing. I got really tired at the end so I sped it up. Sorry for the rushed ending. I'll be putting various one-shots and drabbles in this but I will have it always marked as complete. Some will be long, like this one. Some short. I think the next one is less than 1000 words. It will be just whatever random thoughts and ideas I have. They will mainly feature Zoro, because he's my favorite, but I do have an idea for one for Usopp.
Disclaimer: In a world where 'yes' means 'no', yes, I own One Piece.
Lost
"'Only the lost will be found'? What the heck does that mean?" The navigator of the Strawhat Pirates read the carved arch in front of them. The writing was deeply carved into the top part still visible even with the obvious signs of weathering.
"Maybe it means that we'll find Zoro?" Luffy said, his arms crossed behind his head, his trademark grin on his face.
"Oi!" Said green-haired swordsman folded his arms angrily. "I'm not lost!"
"Not yet anyway." Usopp muttered to Chopper, who giggled into his hooves, the long-nosed sniper and reindeer doctor glancing surreptitiously at Zoro, who was currently fighting with their blonde, curly-browed cook, who said much the same as Usopp, but louder and in his face.
"This labyrinth is well-known throughout the world." The dark-haired archeologist said, ignoring the squabbling pair. "There have been absolutely no records of anyone making it out. They probably all were dismembered and eaten by the mythical monsters that are said to roam the maze."
"Don't say something so scary so calmly!" Nami shouted angrily, while Brook and Chopper became thoroughly freaked out and Usopp suddenly developed I-can't-go-in-this-labyrinth-itis. For once, Chopper pretended to go along with it, claiming that such a deadly disease should be avoided at all costs.
"Shishishishi!" Luffy laughed and suddenly Nami, Chopper, Usopp, and Brook became extremely depressed.
"We're going, aren't we?" Chopper groaned.
"He's already made up his mind." Usopp sighed.
"I've lived a long mostly happy life. I have only two regrets. That we weren't able to meet again Laboon, and that I didn't see more panties." Brook spoke towards the clouds that were suddenly shining light down as if in welcoming towards the inevitable next life.
"Those're your regrets?" Sanji muttered to the side. He took a long drag from his cigarette before glancing at Nami. "I can respect that."
"We need a plan." Nami said, ignoring Chopper who was poking the bloodied and broken bodies of Sanji and Brook with a stick. "Some way to stay together and not get lost."
"How about a rope?" Robin suggested.
"SUPER idea!" Franky exclaimed before pulling some out of his …chest? "If we tie us together in a line, we won't get SUPER separated."
Everyone paused for a moment to look at Zoro. "What?!" He shouted angrily back at them.
"Can we make this more permanent?" Usopp asked, eying the rope. "Like, make a leash for Zoro at all times?"
"That's not a bad idea, Usopp. Then the idiot marimo won't get lost so often." Sanji said. This led to another fight between the two of them, which was ignored by the group at large.
"Shishishishi! Excellent! Let's go!" Luffy shouted in excitement, his eyes still glittering.
"Wait Luffy!" Nami shouted a little panicked as he started to stride towards the darkened archway. "We haven't tied to rope to you yet!"
A few minutes, and a lot of arguments about who was in front of who later, all nine Strawhat's stood in a line, tied together at the waist. Luffy was of course in the front, having demanded it in no uncertain terms, followed by Nami who would hopefully be able to keep him somewhat straight. Sanji insisted on being right behind his Mellorine. Usopp wanted to be next to someone with fighting power so he came next. Chopper was set safely in the middle. Because of the height difference (and making sure that he was also 'safely' in the middle for a different reason) Zoro came next, followed by Robin, Franky, and Brook, again to adjust for height.
Franky gave them handheld lights that he had made. He called them 'portable nipple lights' but absolutely everyone refused to call them that.
As soon as they were all tied and each held a light, Luffy raised his fists in excitement. "Let's go!" He shouted with a laugh.
And they went.
Within five minutes, everyone (except Zoro) came to the conclusion that they were hopelessly and utterly lost.
"Oh dear." Robin said as the more anxious members were already panicking. "We'll probably be stuck in this maze and die of starvation."
"You're not helping!" Nami shouted from the front as she tried to halt Luffy, push of Sanji, and calm Usopp and Chopper all at the same time.
"Nami-san," Brook said from the back. "I can't see the exit anymore. Not that I can see since I have no eyeballs. Yohohoho! Skull Joke!"
"Ow!" Franky shouted, clashing his arms together. "We are SUPER lost."
"We're all gonna die!" Chopper shouted in a panic.
"Tell Kaya about my brave adventures and my heroism at sea. Tell her about the time I single-handedly defeated an entire army of stampeding giants." Usopp said from his defeated pose on the ground.
"What? Really?" Chopper asked, momentarily side-tracked.
"Come on guys! Just follow me! Maybe we'll meet one of those monsters that Robin talked about and get it to take us to the exit." Luffy grinned confidently.
"We are NOT asking a ferocious monster for directions!" Nami, Usopp, Chopper, and Brook shouted in sync. Nami followed it with a hard punch to his head.
"I don't know why you are all panicking." Zoro said calmly.
"Because unlike some moss-heads, being lost is not a normal thing."
Their fight was broken up by Nami but also by Usopp and Chopper who were stuck in between them.
"Now is not the time to fight!" Nami lectured. "We have to figure out a way out of here!"
"Yes, Nami-swa~n!" Sanji cried with hearts in his eyes. "You are beautiful even when you're lost!"
"What I meant," Zoro said again, giving Sanji a one-eyed glare, "was that we aren't lost."
Nami groaned. "Zoro, not knowing where we are or how to get somewhere is the definition of 'lost'. And that's where we are right now.
"No we're not." Zoro argued back, folding his arms.
"Are you arguing with the beautiful and brilliant Nami-swa~n, stupid marimo?"
"Yeah, stupid marimo!" Usopp nodded.
"Yeah, stupid!" Chopper added.
"Yeah, santoryu!" Luffy folded his arms.
"'Santoryu' isn't an insult, Luffy." Nami smacked him on the back of his head.
Zoro's temper continued to rise but he kept his hands from grabbing his swords. Just barely. "No, we're right at the exit. I don't know why you all stopped. The exit is right there." He pointed directly in front of them. They all turned and looked.
And saw a solid wall.
They turned back to Zoro with pitying looks.
"That's not an exit, moss-head." Sanji said, lighting another cigarette.
"That's a solid wall." Luffy laughed.
"You can't just go through a wall." Nami lectured.
The rest of the crew probably would have continued to mock him if Luffy hadn't suddenly exclaimed in excitement.
"Oh! I get it!" They all turned to him. "Let's just bust our way out of here!"
"Oh!" Usopp smacked his fist against his open palm. "Yeah! We'll be out of here in no time!"
"Gomu gomu no~" The rest of the crew ducked as Luffy stretched his arm back, almost knocking out Brook who was a little slower to duck.
"Oi, Luffy!" Zoro tried to shout. "You don't need-"
"Pistol!" His elongated arm shot forward before crashing into the wall. The wall didn't budge. Luffy pulled his arm back with a snap. "Huh." He said, examining the pristine wall. "Maybe I should try 'bazooka.'"
"Luffy!" Zoro shouted. "I'm telling you, you can just-"
He was cut off again by the sound of something deeper in the maze. Something big. And probably full of teeth and claws. Maybe even poisonous. And hungry. Very, very hungry.
"Luffy!" Nami shouted angrily, hitting him on the head again. "You alerted the monsters to our presence!"
"I'm too young to die!" Usopp and Chopper shouted, clutching to each other in tears.
"I'm not but I still don't want to!"* Brook shouted, tears somehow coming from his own eye sockets.
There was a moment of silence as they all stared at the darkness of the maze pathways. The sound of something big walking towards them heightening their fear.
"Oh dear." Robin said.
""Luffy!" Nami shouted angrily, hitting him on the head again. "You alerted the monsters to our presence!"
"I'm too young to die!" Usopp and Chopper shouted, clutching to each other in tears.
"I'm not but I still don't want to!"* Brook shouted, tears somehow coming from his own eye sockets.
There was a moment of silence as they all stared at the darkness of the maze pathways. The sound of something big walking towards them heightening their fear.
"Oh dear." Robin said.
"You aren't allowed to say anything!" Nami shouted before she could add some dark statement about how they were all going to be dismembered and eaten.
"Don't worry, Nami-swa~n, Robin-chwa~n!" Sanji shouted happily. "I'll protect you!"
"Let's ask it for directions!" Luffy said.
"We're going to be eaten!" Chopper and Usopp shouted fearfully.
"SUPER bring it on!" Franky said, firming his stance.
"Ah, this rope will make it difficult to fight normally." Brook observed, getting his own sword ready.
The next thing they knew, some large, dark figure came hurtling out of the darkness. Chaos ensued. There was a moment of pushing and pulling as everyone was hindered by the rope when suddenly, parts of it were sliced through by sharp claws. Chopper's and Usopp's and Nami's screams were mingled with Sanji's declarations of love, Franky's shouts, and Luffy's laughter. Glass shattered as some of the handheld lights were dropped and/or crushed. The remaining lights flashed, making distorted shadows. Some of the shouts started to fade as certain individuals ran. Other's tried to fight but were having a difficult time in the chaos finding their foe.
When the dust settled, the Strawhats were split up in four groups.
Luffy, Nami, and Sanji found themselves tied together in a part of the maze that seemed to curve in either direction. Sanji was ecstatic.
Usopp and Chopper were still tied together in a room with multiple staircases, some twisting, some upside down, with no discernable pattern or order.
Robin, Franky, and Brook were still tied together, standing in a circular room with 10 different passages leading out of it.
And Zoro.
Zoro was standing all by himself, a useless piece of rope hung limply around his waist, like a weird belt. Directly in front of him was the same arched door that he figured was the exit. The one that Luffy had somehow failed to punch through with his pistol.
"Everyone else is lost." He muttered to himself. "Why couldn't they see the door?" He shrugged and pulled it open.
Inside was a large circular room covered in gleaming white tile. It was very bright from no discernable source. The walls were covered in screens, each tile a screen and some tiles combined to make a larger one. Various images of the maze were displayed.
In the middle of the room was an old man, hunched over with age, his nose and ears grossly oversized in a way that only someone really old could manage. He was completely bald on top but had a rather impressive gray beard that reached the ground. He held himself up with a cane.
He was staring at Zoro with his jaw dropped and his eyes practically bugging out of their sockets.
"Yo." Zoro said. He could tell that this man wasn't much of a challenge.
"How- when- not- imposs- never-" The man stuttered.
"Oh, look, there's Luffy." Zoro said conversationally, examining one of the screens that was indeed showing a laughing Luffy, a stressed out Nami, and an idiot love-cook.
"HOW?!" The man finally exploded. "No one has ever been able reach here before in so little time! That's just, that's just not possible!"
Zoro raised a brow. "It wasn't that hard. The door was right in front of me."
This statement seemed to shock the man even more. "This is unprecedented!" He exclaimed. "The door only appears to those that are truly lost. The quickest recorded time was a full three days and that person usually got lost anyway! You'd have to have zero directional abilities in order for the door to appear like that so soon."
Zoro scowled. It sounded like the man was making fun of him. "The door was always there. My crew kept passing it."
"WHAT?!" The man looked at him suspiciously. "When did you first see the door."
"When I entered." Zoro said matter-of-factly. "It was right there to the left of the entrance. The only reason I didn't go through was because Luffy walked past it."
The man was stunned speechless at this. Seeing that he wasn't going to say anything more, Zoro walked around the room, examining the different screens.
"Hey, how do I get out of here? Is this the exit?" The question aroused the man enough for him to answer.
"Yeah. You just go out that way." He pointed a gnarled and bony hand towards a large archway that was the same as the entrance. Through it, bright sunlight was beaming through.
"Great. How do I get the rest of them here?" He gestured to the various screens.
The man cleared his throat in an attempt to collect himself. He tried to act slightly mysterious and wise but even if Zoro had been the type to be impressed by things like that, he had already seen the old guy in some not mysterious or wise expressions.
"'Only the Lost will be Found'." He said in a deep somewhat cryptic voice.
"What is that supposed to mean?" Zoro asked, annoyed. Stupid old geezer.
"It means what it means." The old man said in a slightly snooty voice. His voice caught in his throat however when he was suddenly going cross-eyed at the very sharp sword that was pointed unflinchingly in between his eyes.
"It means that this maze will only help those that are lost. Once a person is Lost, the maze will show them the way."
"Aren't they lost?" Zoro asked confused, jerking his chin at the screens where it showed his obviously confused and lost crewmates.
"Being 'lost' and being 'Lost' are two separate things." The man said, going back to his mysterious tone.
Zoro just stared at him. "Whatever. How do I get them here?"
"Go back out. If the maze likes you so much, maybe it will just lead you to them."
Zoro sheathed his sword, either ignoring or not noticing the slightly bitter tone. "Got it." And without another thought, he opened the door again.
Right in front of him, he saw two of the three weakest members of the Strawhats. Usopp was telling an enthralled Chopper all about how he managed to fight his way through a maze twice as large as this one, crawling with mythical creatures that no one even knew existed when he was only 8 years old.
"Hey, Usopp. Chopper." Zoro called out to them. His sudden appearance shocked them, causing both of them to scream in surprise.
"Zoro!" They both shouted happily. Chopper jumped to him and clung to his waist, tears streaming down his face. Usopp looked like he wanted to do the same but refrained due to a sense of pride.
"We were so scared!" Chopper sobbed. "We thought we were going to be eaten by giant monsters and never see anyone every again!"
"Yeah, well, you're not." Zoro said blandly, ignoring Usopp's lie about how they would have been perfectly safe with him and some other such nonsense. "The exit's right here. Follow me."
"Zoro. Are you sure you should be leading?" Both of them asked seriously.
"What's that supposed to mean?!" Zoro glared at both of them, daring them to answer. "Do you want to get out of here or not?"
They both looked at each other, nodding once, and turned back to Zoro. "If we follow you, we'll be stuck here forever." They said in perfect unison.
Zoro felt what little patience he had rapidly shrinking. "Fine! If you want to stay here, then stay. I'm going to go through this door." He pointed behind him to the door he had just exited. His crewmates examined the wall he was pointing to, Usopp even pulling one of his goggle eyes down. They looked back at Zoro.
"That's a wall." Usopp said in an obvious tone.
"Do you have a fever, Zoro?" Chopper asked concernedly.
He decided to ignore them. Obviously he was the only one that could see the door. He pulled it open and gestured to the white-tiled room inside. The old geezer was staring at him with the same expression of shock he had just exhibited. Chopper and Usopp now had the same expressions.
"Where did that door come from?" They shouted. Zoro questioned why they were always so in sync.
"It's been here the whole time. How do you think I got here? Come on!" He gestured to the door again, and the two Strawhats walked meekly through. He walked in after them.
"Guys, meet Old Guy. Old Guy, Guys." Zoro's introduction seemed to say it all.
"Where is this?" Chopper asked, looking in awe at the screens.
"The exit." Was all that Zoro supplied before turning around and opening the door again. He was getting the hand of it.
He was deposited in a darkened corridor, no different than any other corridor. He was a little surprised to not see any Strawhats right away, like last time. However, as soon as he thought this, he heard the tell-tale sound of a certain cyborg coming steadily closer. He decided to wait by the door. It sounded like they were just around a shadowed corner. As he waited, a light got closer and closer, a mix between a handheld light and Franky's own built in lights.
"Why were you so sure it was this way, Robin-san?" Brook's voice sounded.
"Just a feeling." Was the enigmatic reply from their resident archeologist.
"Ow!" Franky shouted. "I SUPER trust you in knowing your way around places like this Robin."
"Why thank you Franky. Oh!" They had just turned the corner and Zoro shielded his one working eye from the sudden light. "It appears that we've found you, Zoro."
"More like I found you guys." Zoro said, ignoring Brook's and Franky's excited exclamations. "Follow me. The exit is right here." He didn't bother gesturing towards the door behind him. They probably couldn't see it anyway.
"Are you sure we should be following you?" Brook asked skeptically.
"Yeah, you're SUPER not the best with directions." Franky added.
Zoro saw red creeping into his vision. He took a deep breath. "Just trust me."
There was a moment of silence as each member thought about it.
"Very well, Zoro." Robin spoke at last. "Lead the way."
"Are you sure?" Brook asked again.
"Yes." She said, stepping forward.
"How?"
She smiled. "Just a feeling."
Zoro ignored the obvious distrust his crew had and opened the door behind him. There surprise was evident.
"Robin! Franky! Brook!" Chopper shouted excitedly, barreling into Robin just as he had Zoro. "You made it!"
"It seems we did." Robin smiled, ruffling his fur a little.
"Ow! I'm SUPER surprised!" Franky said, looking around the room.
"Indeed. I'm so surprised, my eyes came out of their sockets. Although I don't have eyes. Skull joke! Yohohohoho!"
"I think the maze like Zoro or something." Usopp tried to explain, not really understanding it himself.
"We don't seem to be the last ones." Robin observed.
"I'm on it." Zoro said, and walked out the door again.
He was confronted with an empty hallway again, and this time, he couldn't hear any voices. Since the he was at the end of a dead-end, he simply walked forward. The maze hadn't led him astray thus far.
Getting the trio was a little harder. Apparently the maze didn't like the sea-witch or the ero-cook any more than Zoro did. Or perhaps it was just emulating Zoro's own feelings. He ended up wandering around for a full minute before he heard their voices. Or Nami's screeches to be exact.
"Zoro!"
"Oi, Mosshead."
"Zoro-kun! I'm glad we found you!"
"I found you." He muttered, with his brows furrowed. They ignored him.
"Quick, tie yourself to us. We don't want you wondering off and becoming lost. It's a miracle we even met up." Nami said, smacking Luffy in an attempt to get him to stop being so excited at the prospect of being lost in a maze full of monsters. She failed.
"There's no need."
"Moss-for-brains, don't argue with Nami-swan. Knowing you, you'll end up being lost even just standing there."
The ensuing fight was cut short because Nami was afraid the rope would break even more. Zoro took deep breaths and tried again.
"Listen, I know where everyone else is. They're at the exit. Follow me and I can get you there." He hoped they wouldn't react the same as the last two groups he found.
…He changed his mind. The silent disbelief, almost pitying looks were much worse.
He growled angrily. "You know what?" He said, the last of his temper gone just from looking at the stupid dart-brow's face. "I'm done. I'm going to leave. If you want to follow, then follow. If not, stay here and rot. I don't care." And with that, he abruptly turned and walked away.
They ended up following, but more because they thought that he was going to get lost. For once, the door didn't show up right away. He wished it would. Listening to the three behind him was the worst.
When it did appear, he wasted no time, simply stomped over and yanked it open. He tried not to smirk to big when once again, silence descended on the trio.
The reunion was short and sweet …and pretty much non-existent. They were only separated for like, 5 minutes tops.
They thanked the weird old guy and left the maze.
When they were all back on the ship, Nami finally let the question that had been bugging her for hours be voiced.
"How?" Zoro looked up from where he was currently trying to take a nap. After they escaped the maze, they ended up have an adventure of Luffy proportions and Zoro was tired after all the fights.
"'How' what?"
"How did you manage to find the exit?" She clarified. "Regardless of how fast, you of all people should have been the last person to find the exit."
"I think I have the answer, Nami-san." Robin said with a smile. Those on deck all turned to look at their archeologist. "Do you remember what was engraved on the entrance?"
"'Only the lost will be found.'" Usopp answered for her. There was a moment of silence before everyone sans Zoro smacked their fist on their open palm in unison with and accompanying, "Ah."
Zoro decided that he wasn't going to be offended or start slicing anyone. Besides, he was tired. So, to salvage the last little bit of pride he had left, he closed his eyes and was asleep in seconds.