''What, in the name of Aleister Crowley, is THAT, Snow?''
Baz was looking in mild abject horror towards a curled up lump of fluff which was placed in Simon's lap. A moving, breathing curled up lump of fluff. Throwing his bag on the floor, but not taking his eyes off the lump, Baz edged closer into the living room where Simon was sat looking - it must be said - extremely pleased with himself.
''It's a cat, Basilton. A kitten, if you want to be more precise''.
''Don't be facetious Snow. And don't call me Basilton. What I meant, and what I know you knew I meant, is what in the seven hells it is doing in our flat?''
Simon grinned, and stroked his palm over the lump's head. It purred.
''Penny's cat had babies. And she said this one reminded her of me. Because it's white, and - '' Simon started to blush a bit here '' - because it looks like a snowball''.
Filing this potentially brilliant nickname away for further use, Baz snorted. ''So now, because Penny is almost as manipulative as me, and because you have absolutely no self control, we have a pet. A pet which, may I remind you, looks incredibly similar to the creatures that I drink? Did you remember I'm a vampire? Or did your brain turn to fluff as well as soon as you saw that thing?''
Simon was looking petulant now, and shifted up on the sofa, patting the seat next to him so Baz could sit down. ''You won't hurt her, Baz. I know you won't. Look at her! I need something else in here, something alive, whilst you're gone everyday. It's lonely. You don't want me to start getting lonely do you? I'll get needy. And you hate needy''.
He was needling now, and Baz knew it. (He also knew that, whilst he'd never let on to Snow, he did in fact appreciate a bit of neediness. Especially when it involved that face, and that voice, and those lips, and what they did- )
''Humph. Well, the least you could have done is asked, Snow. It is my flat too. Actually, given that I pay for the entire thing myself, I guess you could say that - ''
''Oh, shut up you great arse. It's a kitten, not a lodger! I'll feed it, I'll look after it, I'll play with it. You won't even know it's here! I promise''.
Now this was not fair. Simon was using his hangdog, puppy eyes expression that sometimes made Baz roll his eyes, and sometimes made his stomach roll over, depending on how he was feeling.
''Fine. FINE. We'll have the damn cat. But make sure you keep it out of my way when I'm...hungry. ''
Simon grinned again, wider this time, and moved the kitten gently onto the sofa so he could stand up and give his boyfriend a kiss. It was a kiss that said 'I've won, and I owe you, and just look how cute it is Basil, just look' all at once.
Exasperated, Baz pushed Simon away after a moment, and bent to take off his shoes. The kitten unfurled and padded over, sniffing and licking at his stockinged feet. Simon could see a muscle working in Baz's jaw, where he knew he was trying not to laugh. Baz won't hurt it.
''I assume it's got a name, this wretched thing?'' Baz glanced up.
''Cherry'' said Simon, and almost burst out laughing as the look of horror returned to Baz's face.
''Cherry?'' Are you serious? Snow, you have called a brilliantly white, almost unnervingly fluffy cat Cherry?''
''Cherry Snow Grimm-Pitch, actually. I thought it deserved at least as many names as you, being the second most important thing in my life - ''
Baz jumped on him, pushing him back onto the sofa. ''Cherry. Snow. Grimm. Pitch'' he growled. ''Crowley, Snow, you are - that is - you are just something else''.
''You get to name our first kid, Baz, promise'' Simon wriggled, and flipped Baz over, grinning all over his stupid face.
Cherry Snow Grimm-Pitch sat up, already practising the look of disdain popular amongst her species, and started to lick her tiny paws.