Done for the 'An Animazing Christmas' Writing competition in OtakuZone. Slight IshiXHime with a hint of HistugayaXKarin.
Disclaimer: I own none of the things in this Fanfiction, except for the idea. This includes the many non-Bleach related things.
December 14th – Karakura Town Clothing District – 14:21 – With Matsumoto
'Ehhh? What's with all the lights? And the trees? So much silverly stuff too...' Matsumoto thought, while shopping. She'd been in the human world for quite a while now. It'd gotten cold here, and one of her favourite pastimes was, while patrolling for hollows, having fun and warming up with shopping! By now, she had mastered the concept of bargaining, as well as using her 'natural charm' on shopkeepers quite well, getting huge bargains on things.
Still, she was quite curious about all the red and green and sparkles at such a normally, nice, if slightly boring place.
She decided to ask someone, and so, walking up to the closest person with all her shopping bags, a woman, she asked, "Er, um, this might seem like a weird question, but could I ask you what's with all the lights? And streamers? And the sales everywhere? You know, that store over there has a 60% off discount on everything!"
The woman looked at her blankly. "You mean you don't know?!" She all but shouted, her face dumbfounded. "This is- it is- thi- it's Christmas!!! When you have parties, get presents and sing carols!!! Oh, Kami-sama, clearly you need help." The woman grabbed Mastumoto's arm, and rushed her to the bookstore, immediately grabbing out a book. "Here you go, this book is called 'Christmas for people who don't know a single thing about Christmas' You need it. I'll buy it for you, this is completely worth the money." Then she mumbled under her breath, "poor soul, doesn't know about Christmas..."
Matsumoto almost said something rude back, but thought better of it. It wasn't as if she chose to be born before this stuff was popular in Japan!
"Thank you," she said instead. She didn't want to be thought bad of.
The woman, after paying for it, gave her the book and wished her a merry Christmas.
As she took it and started to read a bit of the book.
She realised what the Soul Society had been missing out on.
And a plan was slowly forming in her head.
Later that day - Soul Society - 17:44 - Shinigami Women's Accociation meeting
"AHH!!! Great idea~! But...Will there be candy?" Asked Yachiru, her eyes already dreaming of a candy heaven.
Mastumoto had just spread the word – Christmas was awesome and they totally needed a party for it.
"Of course! Has there ever been a party that you've attended without candy?!"
All the other girls there were excited as well. This was gonna be the best party of the year, and they were going to make sure of that!
The next few days were complete chaos, while word was spread around. Mastumoto had made a poster and gave it to every division as well, to make absolutely sure that everyone knew. It looked something like this:
"Shinigami Women's Association Hosts:
The First
'NO WEAPONS, CHRISTMAS DRESS UP PARTY'
Ever in the Soul Society!
Time for presents, costumes and fun!
No need to worry about your costume, because Mastumoto of the 10th Division has bought something for everyone! The costumes will be picked by a raffle, so get your tickets at your Fukutaicho's Office!
*With an exception to the 13th Division, in which you get your raffle from Juushiro-taicho.
Bring presents for your friends if you want!
Ticket numbers will be matched to the costumes on the 19th!
If you do not wear your costume, the Women's Association will hunt you down!
Please go to the 10th Division to receive costumes.
We'll be seeing all of you on the 24th of December, at the 10th Division Barracks, 7:30pm!
Please do not forget that weapons are NOT to be brought to the party.
**Taichos and Fukutaichos must attend ^-^"
December 15th – The Kurosaki Clinic – 15:00 – Ichigo, Rukia, Chad, Orihime and Ishida
"They're making us go to WHAT!?" Ichigo's voice thundered.
All of them were staring at Rukia, who had just dropped a bombshell. "Ichigo, seriously, calm down. It's just a costume party, that's all. I think it will be fun!"
"Yeah!" Chimed in Orihime.
"Ugh" Mumbled Ichigo, still nervous. "But seriously, surprise costumes..."
Ishida and Chad were silent, though they were both internally hoping that they wouldn't get too bad of a costume.
December 24th - 10th Division Barracks – 19:15 – with Mastumoto and her currently grouchy Taicho
"Ehhh? But Taicho, I think it looks perfect on you!"
In front of Mastumoto, stood, in all his glory, Hitsugaya Toushiro – In an elf suit. A big green shirt with a brown belt at his waist, red and green stockings, two floppy green, pointy shoes adorning his feet, and a marvellous red elf hat on top of his head.
Histugaya immediately got an anger mark. This, this thing of an outfit looks perfect on him!? As if! But as he was a Captain, he had to go... and he didn't really want to get hunted down by the Women's Association.
Mastumoto looked perfect, as always, in a figure hugging vampire costume, with blood red lips, sharp canines and a black cape with the collar turned up.
People were arriving already, and the Taicho and Fukutaicho went out to greet them.
"Oi, Mastumoto, tell me again why you had to choose our barracks to hold this party?"
The past ten days had been complete chaos, in which one situation Histugaya was kicked out of his own office, because of decorating. When he finally got to go in again...
He went straight back out, and moved temporarily to the 13th division. His office was a mess of pink sparkles, fish, and cat faces, not entirely unexpected, since the person who was decorating was Yachiru.
"Taicho! How many times do I have to tell you? I came up with the idea, so I get to honour of throwing the party!"
'I don't see how getting my division, with a 100% guarantee, completely destroyed by 9 o'clock is an honour though...' Histugaya thought to himself, still annoyed.
The 11th Division was first to arrive, being the closest division to theirs. Histugaya let out one of his rare smiles. Ha, if this party was worth anything, this sight was it. Yachiru, who had gotten a ninja suit out of the raffle, was sitting on Kenpachi's... Antlers.
Yes, because the fearsome Taicho of the 11th Division, the most ruthless division there is, got a moose costume from the raffle.
"Mastumoto, doesn't Ken-chan look cute?"
Not only that, but the other members looked quite tame, and very embarrased by their outfits.
Then the ultimate bomb of the 11th division came out.
Yumichika strutted, yes, strutted, to the entrance, where even Mastumoto's jaw dropped.
He was dressed in an odd, to saw the very least, costume. A very, er, revealing one too, his usual hairstyle dropped for a white-blond wig, and his feathers removed from his face.
"Eh, Mastumoto, this person, what's her name, Lady Gaga, she doesn't have that bad a taste at all!" Yumichika smiled at her, and then clapped his hands with glee. "Ikkaku's looking beautiful as well! I mean, not neary as good as me but... Won't you come out, Ikkaku?" Then he snickered.
Suddenly, a flowerly background came out from nowhere.
'Oh Kami-sama, I think I know where this is leading... and I'm not enjoying it.' Hitsugaya wanted to cover his eyes, but he couldn't. Those flowers where impossible.
Ikkaku came out from behind a wall...
No way... That could not POSSIBLY be Madarame-san...
*The thudding sound of shinigami bodies connecting with the floor.*
Everyone except for Yumichika, Yachiru and Kenpachi instant KOed, including Histugaya and Mastumoto.
Kenpachi smirked. "Eh, a wig, a dress and a hell lotta makeup could turn even you into a Rapunzel that's pretty easy on the eyes, huh?"
10th Division Barracks - 19:28 - After everyone got over the shock of Ikkaku looking remotely pretty in a dress
"Hyahahahahaha! You guys actually fainted from the shock! I mean, of course, none of you expected him to be pretty, but you guys didn't need to faint! After all-" Yumichika, in the middle of his laughing fit, strikes a modelling pose, "- I'm the prettiest boy here!"
Everyone else had just about arrived by that time. Many other unexpected looks had come through as well.
- Flashback -
"Yo, anyone here? Hello???" Ichigo's voice rang out. The five (Ichigo, Rukia, Orihime, Chad and Ishida) couldn't hear anything in the 10th Division, except for scary laughter, a laugh that went something like, "Heeheeheeheehee, I-I can't be-believe th-hee-they actually – heehee- fainted! Heeheehee. Hyahahaha!"
"Kyaaaa!" Orihime suddenly screamed. Bodies, all on the floor!
Ishida bent down to inspect them, and sighed a sigh of relief. "Don't worry, Hime, they've only fainted."
Suddenly, Rukia (who was incredibly happy despite the fact that there are bodies on the floor around her, because she got the Chappy costume) said, "Wow, some divine force must've – Eeek! Yu-Yumichika-san! Why in the world are you laughing like that? And what the heck are you wearing!?!?"
Yumichika turned around to face the five and – Burst out laughing even harder.
"I-i-heeheehahahee-chigo, you're a – HAHAHA – You got a carrot suit!?" He looked again. "Kyahahahaha! Iiiishi-shi-daaa... You're dressing as your girlfriend, and you're girlfriend as you? My d-dear Orhime – haha – you should've made him dye his hair orange and get extensions, since you got the w-wig and glasses and all – buahahahaha!!!" And just when Yumichika thought that if he laughed anymore, he would probably die from lack of air, he saw Chad.
Yumichika exploded.
"!!!" Could be heard everywhere, waking some people from unconciousness.
Histugaya stirred, and asked irritably, "What the hell is it, Yumichika?"
Gasping for breath, Yumichika struggled the words out. "Ch-HAHAHA-ad-d... HE'S IN AN -HYAHAHAHA- ANGEL COSTUME!!! BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!"
Histugaya slowly turned, and looked at the angel/ironman.
And promptly fainted again.
- Flashback end -
Inside the 10th Division Barracks - 19:30 – Everyone (except for the still laughing Yumichika)
"Well then," Said Yamamoto, who got the Santa outfit (oh, how boring), "Let the first ever Christmas party begin!"
Suddenly emerging from the shadows behind Old-Man-Yama's chair, Soi Fon and Omaeda appeared, dressed as Luigi and Princess Peach.
*Fainting sounds once more*
"GYAHAHAHAHAHA!" (A/N: Lol, all know who this is now) "OMAEDA! WHATEVER YOU TRIED TO DRESS UP AS, YOU FAIL!" Then he said in a more serious tone. "Though really, that crown is wayy over the top, who are you trying to be, anyway? Anyone with a hint of fashion sense knows that they shouldn't try and balance on the fence with that colour. When it's pink, it should either be pale pink or hot pink. Pink pink these days is so..."
Unohana and Isane appear with cold packs for everyone. They both look to be quite happy with their costumes.
Inside Unohana's mind: Ohohohohoho, I simply love this short nurse's skirt! I must make all my minions wear this, I must!
Inside Isane's Mind: Yess!!! Longheld childhood dream achieved! Finally, a cosplay schoolgirl outfit that fits me! *Sees Omaeda* Oh dear, my eyes... I see the light...
Mastumoto recovers from the horrid image first, and dizzily grabs the mic at the center of the stage, shouting everyone to get up, and for Omaeda to go hide himself. The shinigami community cheers, and Omaeda gets a little hurt. (A/N: Aww, poor Omaeda)
"All the girls in here!" Mastumoto screams into the microphone. All the girls scream and cheer. "For all you ladies, we have yet to have unleashed our awesome segment, and main one of the night, 'Pretty Bishies'!!!"
The girls scream louder than ever when a catwalk appears out of nowhere in the middle of the room.
"Okay, all the ladies, here is model number 1. Hisagi Shuuuuuhei!!!"
Hisagi hops down the catwalk, sprouting nosebleeds for many of the girls. "Kyaa, a bunny suit! Hisagi is sooo cute!!!"
Mastumoto flashes a devilish smile. "Now, make room for the real 'cat' of the catwalk, model number 2. Izuru Kiraaaa!!"
More screams and squeals fill the air, and a few wolf-whistles too, much to Kira's embarrasment. He had gotten the pink cat Tokyo Mew Mew cosplay outfit, and wore it well... Too well...
Satisfied now, that not only the girls but the guys too, were pumped, Mastumoto screamed into the mic, "And now make room for model number 3. It's Renji Abaraiiii!!!"
Renji walked his walk down the catwalk, slouched and cool. He was cosplaying Shikumaru Nara, the genius from Naruto, and though the shinigami girls didn't know who the heck that dude was, they completely appreciated that he wore lots of fishnet!
"And now for the final one, unfortunately..." All the audience went 'Awwwwww'. Then Mastumoto winked. "But this one's the one you've all been waiting for! It's the one, the only, BYAKUYA KUCHIKI!!!"
"Nii-san, nii-sama!" Rukia's voice cried over the what sounded like, thousands of girls. It was an absolute thunderous noise, and everyone was wondering what the impassive taicho would wear.
A chant went up.
"Bya-ku-ya! Bya-ku-ya! Bya-ku-ya! Bya-ku-ya!" For once loosening up enough not to even slightly bother with the honorifics.
There was a drumroll, and out came...
A walking banana?
*Crickets don't even bother to chirp, that's how quiet it is.*
Mastumoto sweatdropped. "Err... and that's it! Now, it's time for the food, music, present exchanging and falling mistletoe attack! BoyXboy or girlXgirl is completely allowed! Pucker up those lips, everyone!" She exclaimed, while the banana left the stage, quite coolly.
Everyone was animated again, and you could hear Yachiiru's shouts of "CANDY, FINALLLY!!!" a mile away.
Dozens of rows of Christmas turkey, pudding and punch were put on the catwalk, and everyone started eating.
"You know," Said Kowamura, who got a cat costume, to Nemu, A snowwoman, "This isn't too bad!"
Nemu quietly nodded, and said, "Gomen, but I need to go check up on father. If he doesn't come soon, I will be forced to put a kill code into his main computer."
Kowamura waved bye to Nemu, and started conversation with Momo, who was in a Steel Samurai (A/N: From Phoenix Wright) costume.
In the 12th Division's lab – 20:14 – With Mayuri and Nemu
"No! You – they – THIS IS AN ABSOLUTE BLOW TO MY DIGNITY!" The infuriated taicho shouted at his 'daughter'.
Nemu just stood there quietly. "You need to come, or else Yachiru-san will be set upon the labs."
Mayuri's flushed face seemed to become paler. "Yachiru?" He asked for confirmation. Nemu nodded. "Argh! Of all of the things in the Soul Society, why Yachiru?" He muttered to himself in defeat.
Nemu gave a small smile. If they thought some other costumes were outrageous, everyone would die a second time once they saw this.
Back in the 10th Division Barracks – 21:03 – Everyone
By now, the food had been cleared, the music from the human world had started, and mistletoe has fallen on a few unsuspecting victims, including a RapunzelXPrincess Peach. Both Ikkaku and Omaeda, as well as the people around them, felt sick after that quick kiss.
Ichigo and Rukia, along with Ishida and Orihime and Chad, had left to go back to the human world, and there was a general air of contentment.
On the stage, a stoplight appeared, and Nemu came out getting everyone's attention. Taking the mic, she said, "As you all know, there have been a few Captains missing from this party until now. Nanao-san and I will present them to you."
Nanao, in a Kero suit (A/N: You know, Kero from Cardcaptor Sakura?) came out, and took the mic from Nemu. "Well then, the first missing taicho is my own, unfortunately. Please give warm welcome to Kyouraku Taicho!"
Laughter came upon the crowd as Kyouraku gently skated down the catwalk in a Cardcaptor Sakura outfit. Other's averted their eyes from the sight.
Mastumoto looked at him with a sort of awe. What the heck!? How can his legs be to hairless, yet his arms still so hairy?! No, wait, I don't need an answer to that...
"Yes, I'm embarrassed to call that thing a taicho as well." Nanao said. "Next, we have Juushiro-taicho!" The curtains opened for Juushiro to come out.
"Kyaaaaa!!!"
Juushiro was dressed as a traditional western ghost (A/N: No, not the blanket over body, the actual transparent effect, with the ragged clothes and stuff). His white hair was down, and he literally drifted down the catwalk.
Nanao was shaken. "T-taicho! How'd you get that effect?!"
"Eh? Oh, the 12th Division helped a little. They gave me a potion to drink, and so I've been transparent. Then they put me in a gravity-defying machine, and so now I don't have to walk, just direct my gaze at where I want to go. So much easier!" Juushiro smiled.
The 12th Division can do that?! Everyone thought weakly.
Nemu silently took the mic from a stunned Nanao and said, "Now, father is going to come out. Won't you come out, father?"
Suddenly, music, with lyrics that sounded like:
'Fighting evil by moonlight,
Winning love by daylight.
Never running from a real fight,
She is the one named-'
"ARGHHHH!!! MY EYES!!!!"
Mayuri looked at everyone with a much practised blank face. Yes, he knew that short sailor's outfits didn't suit him, nor did the wig, but he didn't look that bad, did he?
"Actually, father, you do." Nemu said quietly, still with that small smile on her face. "The humans are just lucky they aren't here for this."
Karakura Town – 21:20 – Kurosaki's Christmas Party
*Ichigo, Rukia, Orihime, Ishida and Chad sneeze*
"Eh, do you guys all have colds?" Tatsuki asks.
Ichigo shook his head, but Isshin checked his forehead with much gusto anyway.
"Ah! Good! I knew my son couldn't possibly have a cold!" Isshin laughed, putting the cold-packs, Flufighter and Panadol back into their respective places.
"And that's the reason why I don't get sick." Ichigo mumbled.
10th Division Barracks – 23:30 – Present's time!
"It's time for the present exchange! Have fun everyone!!!" Yachiru said into the mic. "YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY! Thanks soooo much, Ken-chan!" She jumped with glee, looking at her beautiful new 'Make your own Cotton Candy' set. Kenpachi looked at his own present and sighed.
"Yachiru, I don't need a new purple and lime-green limiter. I admit that my current reiatsu-sealing eye-patch is getting old, but these colours..."
Histugaya looked at the lollipop he received from Yachiru, and sighed along with Kenpachi. Why is it that only he gets these kinds presents?
Mastumoto came rustling up to him, and gave him two wrapped gifts. "Taicho, this is from Ichigo! He said his sister wanted to give this to you. Oh, and this one's my one. Use it well!"
He looked at the gifts, and decided to open Karin's one first. Smiling at the watermelon wrapping, he tore it, and read the card.
'Dear Histugaya,' It read, 'Long time no see! Here's something that might keep you entertained, wherever you are. Onii says that he knows where you are, but still won't tell me. Merry Christmas! Karin.'
Hitugaya opened the the present and gave a grin. "A soccer ball? In the shape of a watermelon? Now this is new..." Next, he opened his fukutaicho's, a little carefully, since it was from Mastumoto.
Tearing open the wrapping, he looked.
At the horrible beauty of an Ultraman action figure.
*Anger marks appearing all over his face*
"MASTUMOTOOOOO!!!!"
Ikkaku got a wig from Yumichika, while Yumichika received a bottle of bright blue nail polish from Ikkaku. Renji gave the banana a new cherry-blossom-scented shampoo and conditioner, and got a pineapple back. More odd gifts came out, and everyone was either furious or happy, which is a pretty good atmosphere.
10th Division Barracks – 23:59 – At the party
Mastumoto, having just escaped a terrible death at the hands of her elf *pfft* taicho, jumped back onto stage.
"Minna-san! I'm sorry to say, but it's reaching the end of the party!"
Awww's came from the crowd.
"Let's begin the COUNTDOWN TO CHRISTMAS!"
Everyone joined in.
"TEN!"
"NINE!"
"EIGHT!"
"SEVEN!"
"SIX!"
"FIVE!"
"FOUR!"
"THREE!"
"TWO!"
"O-"
BOOM!!!
"Eh?" Said a slightly confused Aizen. "I guess we invaded at the wrong time, huh?"
And there you have it! Hope you enjoyed, and have a Merry Christmas!