Demi's P.O.V.
I sighed waking up breathing in bleach from the kitchen. My step mom was cleaning the floors again because my drunk of a father almost cut his finger off. This is an often occurrence in the Lovato house. I stopped caring if he was okay a long time ago he hurt me too many times. You're supposed to always love your family, but I think there are somethings that aren't forgivable. How can you love someone that you don't trust, someone that you fear? You can't it's not possible. My thoughts ran constantly everyday like this. There wasn't a time of the day where I wasn't in constant anxiety or fear. It's not okay living like this. I got in the shower and stared at my legs full of scars and cuts. It sucked living like this and having very few people care about your life. I'm so broken inside and out. I finished up and dried my dark brown hair before putting on some black pants with a black t-shirt and a sparkly vest. I self harm my legs because I've almost gotten caught in situations where I needed to roll up my sleeves. Good thing we had a cat before and I could cover my butt. There's only a few scars on my arms but there is no way you would know I cut myself from how little it is. My legs are a different story and I don't hold back there. I yawned and ruffled through my stuff before finding a razor. I packed it in my gray book bag and got my black boots on. I made it out of the front door before my father woke up. That's my goal every morning. He's not strict he doesn't care where or when I go places. All he cares about is alcohol, drugs and his image so as long as he doesn't get a call from the cops or someone he could care less what I do. It's nice when you have an abusive father that isn't breathing down your throat. I just stayed away from here as much as possible or it's not good. I never knew my mom she moved to Florida when I was 4. All of my friends think my life is normal. No one knows about my self harm or my family issues. All they think is I fight badly with my step mother and my dad gets on my nerves which is a very normal teenage problem. I like it to stay that way my dad works from home running a business that was given to him by my step mom's family. Every cent from that goes to his drugs. It's pathetic and I'm so glad that I'm an only child and don't have to have someone else living this fucked up life too. One day they'll be busted and they'll ask for forgiveness and I can tell them to shove it. I got out of there and made my way to the Jonas house. Nick Jonas and I are best friends along with my cousin Selena Gomez. We are always inseparable. Since my home life wasn't great so growing up I spent most of my time at the Jonas house. Denise Jonas is kind of the surrogate mother of the friendship. Selena's parents loved me but that didn't support my drug addicted parents. They didn't know they still did drugs but Selena's mom knew it happened when I was a kid. Than my mom left and Mandy never liked her ex brother in law he once sexually assaulted her. No one believed my aunt and she promised me she would never tell Selena what they were like back than. My aunt also only wanted me over or Selena over each others houses there often only once a week. Most of the time Mandy would for go that rule on nights Selena suggests sleeping over my house. I've only let her when my dad was out of town. Nick's older brothers Joe and Kevin were always hanging out and leaving Nick behind that just made us even closer. It was like this for about 10 years. Joe was a little older than us but he started kindergarten early so he was only one grade above him. Which is why Kevin and Joe always bonded more. Joe was the same age difference from Nick as he was with Kevin but Nick and Kevin were double. Joe and I use to be close and get along but things changed.
I walked to Nick's house and knocked on the door as it swung open.
"You're late." Joe said rolling his eyes at me.
"Sorry." I walked in past him and into the kitchen. He was miserable to talk to ever since Kevin left. He was not only his brother but his best friend. He went into the army without telling anyone and it almost ruined the family. The bright side was there's a guest room so I can sneak in if I need to get away and I didn't want to go home which was often.
"Demi!" Denise smiled getting me a hug. I love her so much. She treats us like a family and it's the only place I feel extremely safe. I've always felt that here ever since I was little.
"Where's Selena?" She asked me.
"I'm not sure. She usually is here by now." We all had breakfast together every morning since Kevin left mid last year. Before that we always came over after breakfast which sucked because I would starve. My parents didn't cook, sometimes my stepmom would make enough for leftover and I would have food. Usually it's only for the two of them, they think sixteen is too old to need dinner made. Which is fine but they lock the pantry and that's so twisted. I would get a job and buy my own food but they would find it and I have too much going on in my life to worry about a job. I want a summer job to get me out of the house. I almost didn't survive last summer. It was really scary and terrible some nights I slept outside to hide from my dad. I would sneak a banana sometimes. My stepmother was a size 0 and anything bigger than 2 is fat to her. So if I ate anything around her she would call me fat. It was a lot of mental games with her. My dad played his games physically. I knew I wasn't fat it didn't bother me but I had many other issues.
"Hey!" Nick came over for a hug.
"Hey friend." I smiled hugging him tightly.
"Where's that cousin of yours?" He asked sitting down next to me at the table.
"Right here!" Selena walked in with Joe and they both sat down.
"Aren't you dressed a little too fancy for school?" Joe looked at Selena with a judgmental face painted on.
"Shut up asshole." Selena rolled her eyes, she was wearing a green dress and Joe wasn't wrong. She just wanted to impress Nick. I know she's been trying to get him to ask her out for the longest time.
"Whatever Tinkerbell." Joe laughed.
"Tinkerbell has blond hair, idiot." I said the last part under my breath but Joe still heard it.
"Nice shot freak." Joe played back.
"I think you look beautiful Sel." Nick smiled sweetly. Joe rolled his eyes and glared at me. It hurt but I guess I started it, usually when he called me a freak it's first and if his friends are around the house. It was only us today since Paul Jonas was sleeping in late and Denise won't eat without him. It's really cute they love each other so much. I envied that, to have parents in love and to be in love. I couldn't imagine how that must feel. She served us pancakes with strawberries and bananas. I devoured it. We finished eating and Denise handed Joe and Nick a paper bag.
"Hold on I have to go to the bathroom." I quickly ran to the bathroom and pulled out my razor from my bag. I made a few surface cuts and patted the blood away. I came out of the bathroom a few minutes later. I needed the release before the school day.
"It's about time Demi!" Selena said not wanting to be late for school. I was surprised Joe didn't say anything but he had a weird look on his face. We made our way to Joe's car. Joe didn't like driving us but that was the rule if he wanted a car. He only drives us to we're supposed to find our own way home. We always do except for the occasional missing the bus and I'll walk home if that happens but Nick and Selena end up calling him.
I walked into school with Nick and Selena by my side. It was the end of the school year we were taking finals. A lot of boring stuff, I wasn't the best student. I didn't care except for English class. I was really into writing and film specifically TV I was raised by it growing up and It's my passion. If you could count it as one. I didn't have much time to write. It was hard doing anything but fighting to stay alive. I was ready to be a junior already it sucked being an underclassman. The lucky upperclassmen get film classes and I was so excited for that. I was sixteen as of March 23rd, Selena and Nick were still fifteen they're summer babies.
"Only a few more days we got this!" Selena said optimistically. I rolled my eyes looking down the hall seeing Joe flirting with some girl. It was annoying. That's all he ever does it seems like. I thought he had a girlfriend but I never can keep up with him. Who could? I went off to class I could barely concentrate the rest of the day. People in school picked on me a lot, it wasn't intense most of the time I was invisible but some classes I was a target. It was usually the classes I didn't have with Selena or Nick. Today was pretty easy no one said much. It's nice having easier days it makes handling the nights better.
I walked out and looked around for Selena as I saw her getting on the bus. I sighed I was hoping Selena wanted to do something after school. I should've texted her before I got outside. I wasn't ready to be home. The more time I spent there the scarier it gets. I ran into Joe. He looked at me for a second.
"Isn't that your bus?" He questioned me.
"Yeah I looked back down." I didn't want to talk to anyone.
"It just pulled away? You're not getting a ride from me." Joe stated.
"I would never get in a car with you alone." I glared at him.
"Oh really? Why you think I would try something." He laughed at that thought. I didn't think that but it hurt that he would even say that.
"No I just can't stand to be in the same room as you the only reason I go in your car ever is for Nick my best friend." I folded my arms.
"Same goes for you freak. If I wasn't being forced to spent time with you I wouldn't even give you the time of day." He was angry.
"I wouldn't ask for anything from a dick like you. Lack of any kind of human emotions. Have fun living a lonely live robot." I wanted to scream.
"Screw you loser." He walked to his car.
That hurt a lot I hopped on my bus. I didn't take the bus that goes to my house so people didn't know where I lived. It could be a bad idea if people that didn't like me knew where I lived. The only people that know are Selena's family and the Jonas' and I've made it clear to them I don't want them around my house. I took the bus to the next neighborhood over. I sat looking out of the window the whole ride. I dozed off and woke up to a hard stop, I looked around we were here. Everyone got up and exited the bus. I was grabbed by an arm.
Author's Note:
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