Me: Hey! I'm back! And with my first Shadow story! Yay me! This is just a substitute for Project Supernova. I am almost finished, but not quite.

See, I said I would update with the next five reviews, which shouldn't have been a problem, since it usually takes about a month at the least for that to happen. About three days later, I get SEVEN reviews! Special thanks to someone named Mnicknack who decided to leave awesome reviews on every one of my stories! THANK YOU SO MUCH! *ahem* Anyway, enjoy the story!

Roxy: She doesn't own anything.

Me: Hey! Where have you been?

Roxy: *sigh* Explaining who I am to everyone. They keep asking! Why? Did you miss me?

Me: O-of course not!

Roxy: Read and review!

Dang hatchet's too far away.

Table? Too heavy.

Maybe I could use the blanket as a rope, but she'd have to get close enough…

If only I could still chaos-spear…

I sighed wistfully, picturing all of the gruesome ways I could kill my current host. I could almost hear her agonized screams. She would be cowering…begging…pleading for her worthless existence. But I would show no mercy, for I was the Ultimate Life Form.

Now if only I could sit up…

I sighed in agitation, trying for the umpteenth time to get comfortable on the fluffy reddish-orange sofa I was currently laying on. This might've been a lot easier if I didn't feel like an elephant had spent three hours sitting on me.

Now, I know what you're thinking. The Ultimate Life Form feeling weak? Unable to sit up? How lame is that? Well, I got news for you. The Ultimate Life Form has a weakness. That's right, I said weakness. Tell anyone and I'll chaos-blast you into oblivion. As soon as I get my strength back, that is.

See, while you humans get your stamina from things like eating and sleeping, I get my power from chaos energy. I'm like a chaos generator. My body constantly produces chaos energy, so that I could go for years with out eating, sleeping, or even exercise and still come out kicking.

Which is great…until a certain madman figures out how to harness that energy. That crazy doctor drained me dry, in the dead of winter, and left me to turn into a hedge-cicle while he transferred my energy into some Christmassy, egg-related weapon he planned to use for his latest attempt at global domination!

That being said, I suppose I should be grateful that someone found me. I just wish it hadn't been that infuriating wolf!

"Oh Shaaadow…"

Speak of the devil…

I turned my head slightly to fix my normally spine-chilling glare at the silver-furred headache who was leaning casually on the back of the sofa, smirking down at me.

"What?" My harsh response only caused her smile to widen. I just know she's enjoying this.

"Oh, don't give me that! I was just gonna let you know I'm starting dinner. How does chicken soup sound?"

"…Horrible."

"Great!" She stood up. "I'd better get stared then!"

Vase? Too far away.

Picture frame? Ditto.

I sighed in irritation. It was still hard to believe that I'd only been here for what…a week? And five of those days I was unconscious (and apparently snore…). So that means that means I've only spent two days with her and she's already driving me up the wall. Which means she's more annoying than Sonic's sense of humor. And Amy's possessiveness. And Cream's high-pitched voice. And even that stupid blue fuzz-ball she calls her pet!

On second thought, I take it back. I'd gladly hold an entire conversation with that chao than spend another day here!Why? I am usually very apathetic. It takes a lot to get under my skin. I can take whining, nagging, hyperactive-ness (*cough* Sonic *cough, cough*), and even the occasional obsessive fan-girl attack without flinching. But this particular wolf has been hopping around on my dignity with a spear-tipped pogo stick from the moment I awoke. It is a constant challenge not to lose my temper.

"Dinner's ready!" came the cheerful call from the kitchen as the wolf, who goes by the name of Jasper, poured the soup in a bowl and made her way toward me. I could smell several different spices from my vantage point on the couch, and my stomach growled it's approval. Rather loudly.

"Hungry, are ya?"

"Drop dead."

"Maybe later." In one fluid motion, she set the small, breakfast-in-bed table on my lap and placed the food on it, complete with spoon. However, the instant my hand touched the spoon, she snatched the bowl away. I gave her my this-had-better-be-good glare. Jasper responded with a smile, amber eyes adorning an unnerving mischievous glint.

"You forgot to thank me, Shadow." She tsked and shook her head.

"….What?"

She kneeled down and gave me a look she'd give a confused toddler. "Thank: Verb- to express feelings of gratitude to somebody or-"

"I know what 'thank' means!"

"Then prove it. Say thank you."

"No."

"Oh, come on, Stripes. I made all that effort to prepare this; the least you could do-"

"You heated up leftovers! Big deal!"

"My house, my rules. Now say thank you."

"Make me."

A pause.

"Okay." Ignoring my perplexed expression, she promptly turned and placed my food on the kitchen counter. My stomach immediately growled in protest.

I scowled. "If you're trying to threaten me…"

"I am not threatening you," she replied calmly. "You are living in my house. If you wish to eat the meals I provide, you will thank me for them." I folded my arms in heated defiance. The sooner she learned not to push me around, the better. She sighed. "Suit yourself." Then, she walked back to the serving bowl and poured some for herself, which she proceeded to eat right in front of me.

Not that this bothered me, of course. The Ultimate Life Form didn't need lousy mortal food. I would be just fine, thank you very much. Even so, it was going to be a very long night…

Me: Ahhhhhhh! That was HORIBLE! I got Shadow's personality all wrong! Oh well, nothing a bit of DgShadowChocolate's stories won't fix! And I know it's short! I promise you, the next one will be longer! I'll update with the next five reviews! Though what I update on depends on my poll results…*Hint, HINT!* So REVIEW!