Happy Valentine's Day my lovely readers! Just a short little fic for the lot of you!
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Krieg's Valentine's Advice
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When I was younger, all the kids would give out little cards and candies to one another. And every year, I'd grumble about how stupid it was that I had to give candy and a card to Marcie, because the two of us had always hated each other. Always. And every year that I was forced to partake in that idiotic tradition, I'd be the only one that didn't get anything from her.
And, well, now she was dead so I guessed it didn't really matter. I got back at her in the end.
But now I was older, and also living on Pandora with like five other Vault Hunters, so I didn't really know what sort of Valentine's Day thing I would do now. Especially since I wanted to celebrate with Zero but didn't want everyone else to know I like liked him. So of course, I tried to talk to Maya…
"Sorry kid, me and Axton are going out to kick some bandit ass."
…And it didn't help me at ALL. And since Maya was busy and I did NOT really want to talk to my crush or insane people about it there was only one logical choice.
Krieg.
I approached the psycho cautiously, because even though he was on our side I was NOT willing to catch him by surprise. If I learned one thing back home, it was DO NOT SNEAK UP ON CRAZY PEOPLE (proud to say my Dad taught me that, but that's another story). "Hey Kreig," I greeted with a wave. Talking to him about Valentine's Day wasn't exactly ideal since Maya was normally the one I'd go to with problems like this, but me and the psycho had some sort of weird understanding that even Maya didn't understand even though she found the guy and won his heart with practically no effort whatsoever on her part.
"I'm here to shank and smile!" he greeted in response, which caused me to grin. Even if sometimes the guy creeped me out, he was just too hilarious sometimes.
"So Krieg, have you spent a long time here in Pandora?" I asked, taking a seat next to him. He tilted his head in my direction and for a second I thought I saw… I don't know, something, change in his eyes for a second before going back to normal, crazy Krieg.
"I looked into the heart of darkness, AND I ATE IT ALL!" He replied, throwing his fists into the air. So glad that his buzz axe was currently lodged in the wall across the room.
I blinked. He stared at me, kind of like a puppy wanting to be praised for completing a trick. "Um, I'll take that as a yes."
He seemed to brighten at my reply and hit his fist against his knees. "Meaaaat!"
"Well, I was wondering if there was anything I should do today to celebrate… I mean, I guess I want give Zero something, but I want to involve everyone because if I don't then Salvador and Axton'd make fun of me for liking him."
"The cotton candy pours from the wounds," he stated.
I grinned at him and winked. "Thanks Krieg, I knew you'd keep my secret."
Krieg nodded and I felt a little bit better than before. It was always weird talking to Krieg, but always so enlightening. "The mountain of truth shall be destroyed by my MEAT BICYCLE."
"Aw, you're such a charmer," I snickered. "Anyways, any tips on what to do?"
"I can't see her anymore... She was so clear and bright... but the blood is in my eyes, and now I can only watch the ocean of blood... Its waves crash against my forehead again and again, AND I JUST NEED TO LEARN HOW TO SURF!"
Oh my holy Claptrap. Epiphany! "So I should just do something that I don't normally do for everyone and then I'll feel like I actually did something for Zero but everyone will think I just did it for everyone?"
"SALT THE WOUND!"
"You're a fucking genius Krieg. A crazy, romantic genius. Man, I gotta go to you for advice more often!"