KS: Hello everyone, it is KnightSpark, here with another Paludusa fanfic. I'm surprised that my pairing of goddesses of two conflicting powers has gotten so popular, so I decided to make one with a Valentine's Day theme. I hope you enjoy it. Also, don't bother asking me to write explicit stories about these two, okay? From what I've been hearing, the admins are cracking down on that, even though there's like, I don't know, a billion of them. But not gonna temp fate and get my account removed, so... just don't.
"Hey! Move your wing, Pit-stain! I can't see!"
"Quit shoving me, Pittoo! I'm trying to get a closer look!"
"Will you two shut up! We're going to draw attention!"
"Well Mistress Viridi, I think you should take your own advice and-"
"Shut up, Phosphora! No one's talking to you!"
Pit, Viridi, Phosphora and Dark Pit (commonly refered to as Pittoo) were kneeling down in front of a slightly closed door, seeing through the small opening. They were all witnessing something they thought would never happen. It was something that defied logic itself. Something so shocking that it would cause the Underworld Army surrender without question. And that thing is Medusa, the Goddess of Darkness in the kitchen cooking breakfast. What would one of the most feared beings of the Underworld be doing in a kitchen of the temple of her sworn enemy, the Goddess of Light, Palutena?
"What are all of you doing spying on Medusa like that?"
Everyone swiftly turned around to see the aforementioned goddess standing behind them, hands on her hips and giving them a suspicious look.
"L-Lady Palutena! I swear, this isn't what it looks like!" Pit stuttered. "Pittoo dragged me over here and-"
"Shifting the blame to others, Pit? I taught you better than that." Palutena said almost scoldingly.
"As much as I hate to admit it, it's the truth," Pittoo cut in. "I did drag him over here to see what was going on. He didn't believe when I told him what I saw, so I had no alternative." Palutena nodded, then shifted her gaze to Viridi and Phosphora.
"What's your reason for spying on Medusa?"
"Like I need to tell you anything," Viridi spat out. Palutena's eyebrow twitched a little.
"Look here, you little brat, I just want to know why you're spying on Medusa through a slightly opened door. You don't have to be so rude."
"I wouldn't have to be rude if you didn't interrogate me."
"Interrogate!? Why you ungrateful little- I would have you thrown in a vat full of weed killer just to get you to behave!"
"Weed killer? Really, Palutena? That's the best you can do?"
"Why you…"
"What's going on out here? What's with all the yelling?"
Everyone turned to the now open door where Medusa was standing in. Palutena and Viridi stopped their little squabble to turn to the Goddess of Darkness. But instead of her usual ominous attire, she was wearing a black silk nightgown and had pink fuzzy slippers on her feet. Even more surprising is that she had an apron on. An apron. Pit and the others stood their with their eyes and mouths wide open while Palutena smiled brightly.
"Good morning, sweetheart," she said while wrapping her arms around Medusa.
"Good morning to you too," she responded while kissing her full on the lips. Pittoo and Phosphora turned to Pit and Viridi.
"Would either of you care to tell us why Medusa and Palutena are sucking face?" Pittoo asked impatiently. Pit was about to explain, only to have Viridi beat him to the punch.
"They're in a relationship."
"Oh. Well, that explains the racket I've been hearing for the past week." Pit looked as his twin in confusion.
"What racket? I didn't hear anything."
"That's because you always have your headphones on listening to rock music every night."
"What were they doing every night?" Phosphora asked, causing Palutena and Medusa to break their lip-lock and gave Pittoo a death glare.
"W-Well… I might've… misheard…"
"You heard nothing, boy. Understood?" Medusa ordered threateningly. Pittoo nodded feverishly. "Good. Now, instead of standing around here like vacant fools, why don't we all head to the kitchen? I made breakfast for everyone."
"You made breakfast?" Phosphora said in disbelief.
"And here I thought that the day when the Goddess of Darkness does something that wasn't evil would be when the Underworld freezes over," Viridi sighed.
"Now that you brought it up, it has been a bit cold there lately," Medusa said.
The nature goddess facepalmed. "I just had to bring that up."
Everyone apart from Palutena was surprised at what was on the table. There was toast, eggs, pancakes, waffles, bacon, sausages and hash browns all over it. And the best part is, none of the food was burnt to a crisp.
"Wow! D-Did you make all of this, Medusa!?" Pit asked in awe of the food in front of him. Medusa smirked a little.
"You sound surprised, Pit. Didn't think an evil goddess like myself could create something so wonderful, did you?"
"Well, up until two months ago, I didn't think an evil goddess can get in a relationship, let alone with Lady Palutena." Palutena swiftly turned her head and glared at Pit, making the young angel sweat uncontrollably.
"Are you saying that I'm incapable of being in a relationship!?" she snapped.
"N-No, Lady Palutena! All I meant was that it seemed unlikely that Medusa of all people would be in a relationship!"
"That's almost similar to what I said!"
"Palutena, could you please settle this later on? I want to start eating already," Viridi whined, taking a seat on one side of the table. Phosphora sat across from mistress while Pittoo sat beside her. Pit took a seat beside Virida and Medusa and Palutena sat on opposite sides of the table. Almost immediately, they began to eat what was in front of them. It tasted very good, like it was crafted by an artist. Pit munched on some bacon, Viridi gobbled up the pancakes, Pittoo ravaged the sausages and Phosphora took a big bite out of every waffle she had. Medusa was glad to see that her cooking was putting a smile on everyone's face. When they finished eating, they slumped down on their chairs, satisfied with their meal.
"I'll admit, that was very good Medusa," Pittoo said.
"Yeah, I didn't think you could cook like that," Phosphora complimented.
"Well, I'm glad you all liked it," Medusa replied, giving a big smile.
"How did you even learn how to cook like that anyway? I honestly doubt that the Underworld has books on cooking down there," Viridi snarked.
"Well, one of my minions brought such a book to me while they were out terrorizing the people. At first I paid no mind to it, but I gave in and began to read every page of it. Next thing I knew, I was cooking for entire Underworld Army. I enjoyed it for a while, until Hades caught wind of what I was doing and told me not to do it anymore."
"Well, I'm glad I brought you back because you have done such an excellent job," Palutena said, walking up to Medusa and kissed on her neck, making the gorgon blush a little.
"Come on… not in front of them, Palutena. At least wait until we're alone."
"Oh boy…" Pittoo groaned.
"What was that 'oh boy' for?" Phosphora asked her boyfriend. He turned to her with an annoyed look.
"She wants us to get out so they can have the whole place to themselves." Medusa's whole face went red and covered it so nobody would notice, while Palutena just smiled with her eyes closed. Nobody seemed to be aware of the menacing aura she gave off, but Pit immediately notice it and started to shiver.
"Pit?" Palutena said, nearly making the angel jump out of his seat.
"Y-Yes, Lady Palutena?"
"Don't you and your friends have somewhere to be right now?"
"U-Uh… Yes! I almost forgot! We were going to see a movie today! Isn't that right, Viridi?" He shot a desperate glance at the Goddess of Nature. She rolled her eyes and decided to play along. But not without messing around with Pit, of course.
"Oh, thanks for reminding me, Pit. And I'm sure you and emo body double will pay for everything we buy. Right, Phosphora?"
"Of course. After all, it is the man's job to pay for everything," she said, smirking in Pittoo's direction.
"You're dreaming if you think I'm going to pay for everything you-" He got cut off when Pit swiftly grabbed his collar, pulled him to where he sat and whispered him the consequences of making Palutena mad. At first Pittoo brushed it off as conjecture, but as Pit went further into detail, he complexion became more pale than normal. He turned to Phosphora, forcing a big smile. "What I meant to say was, it would be a dream to pay for everything you want, my sweet lightning bolt." Phosphora snickered a little.
"Aww, you flatterer. Come on, let's go!" Both couples quickly left the kitchen, leaving the two goddesses to their own devices. Pit teased his doppelganger about the lightning bolt bit, which the latter responded by slapping the other angel in the back of his head. Shortly after they left, silence return to the kitchen. Palutena let out a sigh of relief and lightly nudged Medusa's shoulder.
"Okay, Medusa. They're gone now," she said. But for some reason, she didn't remove her hands from her face. Palutena got worried and nudged her again, only to get no response. She leaned in closer until she was an inch away from her face. Before she could ask if she was okay, Medusa suddenly tackled Palutena to the floor, passionately kissing her on her lips and stroking her back. When they seperated, the Goddess of Light gave her dark yet beautiful lover a coy smile.
"You were faking it the whole time, weren't you?" she said, almost accusingly.
"Oh, you know you liked it," Medusa replied, kissing her on the forehead.
"I'm still surprised that you made food that good. And on your first try, no less."
"To be honest, I was planning to have just for the two of us, but those fools were behind door spying on me, so I figured they could have some too."
"Did you really think just the two of us could eat all of that?"
"Not really. But I did make something just for you."
"What is it?"
"Close your eyes and stick out your hands." Palutena was excited. She wondered what Medusa had for her. She closed her eyes and stuck out her hands as instructed. She felt something smooth and hard land on them.
"Okay, you can open your eyes now."
When Palutena opened her eyes, they began to water. In her hands lied a heart shaped pendant with gold lining. Inside the pendant, there was a picture of her and Medusa standing next to each other with Medusa kissing her on the top of her head.
"What do you think of it?" Medusa asked.
"It's… beautiful," Palutena said, wiping away a tear.
"So is the woman I gave it to." She hugged Palutena and kissed her on the cheek.
"You're beautiful too, you know."
"I know. Happy Valentine's Day, Palutena."
"Happy Valentine's Day, Medusa."
And with that, they kissed each other on the lips once more.
KS: Sweet ending, huh? There should be more fanfics with this pairing, be it tame or explicit. However, for those of you who plan to write that kind thing with the admins on your back, consider the top line your first and last warning. I mean it, dude. If you value your account, don't prevoke the admins.