Chapter One: We Were Bound To Be Set Free, Eventually.
"I sure as hell never cut my wrists, lookin for attention." Daryl screamed at her, the moonshine kicking into his system all at once.
"Don't say that, you don't know-" her hushed words were cut off by his louder, harsher ones.
"It's true, aint it? Face it, girl. You were weak. And it don't look like you've come too far." he ranted on, his voice undoubtedly inviting the dead to their doorstep.
"Risking both our lives just to get yourself a drink like some sorority bitch." he continued, getting in her face as she pushed herself up from the makeshift table they made on the floor.
"Daryl, stop it." she whispered loudly, reaching out to grab his wrist in an attempt to settle him down.
"Don't touch me. I shoulda just left you at the prison back then. You're only makin things worse bein around me. All the others are dead and I'm stuck takin care of a sheltered lil farm girl. Life sure is funny, aint it." he ranted, looking her dead in the eyes, watching as her bright blue ones filled with tears.
Beth bit the inside of her lip before stumbling away from him. There was no point in lyin to herself. He was scaring her and she had to put some distance between them before he went off anymore towards her.
"I'll just leave you to it then, Mr. Dixon." she replied, her voice shaking as she blinked the tears back before they got a chance to fall and stream down her pale cheeks.
"'bout time." he muttered, snatching his crossbow off the wall, pushing past her roughly as he went into the cramped bedroom down the hall. Beth winced as he slammed the door shut, the creak of a rusty box spring the only sound she heard after that. She had no doubt that Daryl had collapsed on the bed in there, paying her no mind.
She knew she shouldn't have assumed anything bad about the man down the hall but she had been drinkin and he shouldn't have been so sensitive.
He's right though. Out of all the people in our group to be stuck with, I'm sure I'd be the last one chosen.
Her buzz was quickly wearing off as she put her hand on her sheath where she kept her knife, pushing herself out the back door and collapsing on the opened porch that faced the dark forest. She rested her back against the rusty railing as she sat on the cold cement of the steps.
She understood now why people drank; and she understood even more why she wouldn't again. She wasn't herself. She never would've said something like that to him if she was sober. She never would have made a comment that she knew was an unfair pass of judgment. But there was nothing she could do now.
If I had any sense of decency, I would leave right now and let him off the hook. He could survive on his own and be much happier without me draggin him down.
And maybe that's what the best option was. Sure, she could hold her own against a couple walkers. She was skilled with her knife and she could run pretty damn fast. But Daryl thrived in this world. He knew how to live off the land and protect himself. When she first met him on the farm, you would never know the world had ever been different. He moved around the prison and the forests like he had never had a life better then this. And she admired him for it. And he deserved a chance to live and make a life for himself. She knew she had to go. Because he was right.
About all of it.
She pushed herself up from the steps and headed back into the house, her mind completely clear and conscience of her choice. She reached to the small chest just inside the doorway for her backpack when she heard the stairs creak across from her. She looked over with surprise to see Daryl standing on the last step focusing his narrow blue eyes on her.
Great, he got a second wind.
"What are you doin, girl?" he asked, stepping down one more step until he was one the ground floor, taking a couple strides until he was a foot away from her.
She tightened the hold on her bag, slowly standing up completely, putting it over her shoulders.
"I figured I'd best be gettin outta here. Figured you were passed out upstairs but since you're here, good luck, I suppose" she answered him, twisting on her heels to grab the doorknob. She barely heard it click open when his voice stopped her.
"Don't make me chase you through the fuckin woods, Beth. We're both tired but I swear to god I'll do it. Put that down and close the door. I'm sick of the pity party." he finished, his words still fueled by traces of alcohol, his cheeks still slightly red from it. He mumbled under his breath a few more words but she couldn't make them out. And as he turned and took a few steps up the wooden stair, she didn't think she wanted to know what else he had to say.
"You want me to stay even after all that stuff you said?" she exclaimed in disbelief, never letting her guard down or releasing her bag, her lifeline, from her grasp.
"Yes. We've been drinkin. Let's just forget all this bullshit and get some sleep. We gotta be outta here at sun-up."
"Why are you looking after me? You coulda left me at the prison like you said you wanted to. Why didn't you?" she demanded, the adrenaline making her brave.
"Hershal was a good man. I owe it to him to look out for his girl." he said, walking up the stairs further until she had to look up at him on the second floor landing as she spoke again.
"So you're draggin me along because of my daddy? As some kinda penance or something?" she asked, following him up the stairs, never doubting his threat to chase her through the woods and drag her back here. She was too tired to run. Too tired to fight.
"Mhhm." he mumbled his reply, walking into the bedroom and throwing himself on the bed, his hands behind his head as he lay flat on his back.
It was then that Beth noticed him for the first time. She stood in the bedroom doorway, looking at him completely unshaken by the angry words they had shared only minutes ago. As if this was normal for him. To spew hate and cruelty when there was alcohol involved. And who knows, maybe it was. But it wasn't for her.
And she hoped it never would be.
"And if we left tomorrow and along the way I was bit? Or taken? Or killed? Would you feel anythin'?" she asked, not knowing why she tortured herself when she knew the answer. She shut the door and sat on the other side of the bed, as far to the edge as she could.
"Nothin I couldn't live with." he grunted, his eyes shutting as he rolled away from her to fall asleep.
"I guess that's that then." she whispered, laying down in the bed with her back facing his and falling into a hard, dark sleep.