My parents' annual Christmas party is tonight. I am not looking forward to it. A bunch of my parents' lame work friends trying to treat me like a baby, BORING!!! It's the most retarded thing in the whole wide world. Who would want to go to that?
My parents want me to look nice……………EWWW!!! I just decided to wear my least religious offending shirt and my yellow skinny jeans, that's nice, well at least in my world it is. What do you think they'll do ,make me wear a dress (HOPEFULLY NOT)?
"Miley! Are you dressed?"
"No. I'm not going to your retarded Christmas party. Damn it Mom, how many times do I have to tell you this!"
"Yes you are, this is a family thing." Mom replied opening my bedroom door.
"Hire the neighbor girl to be your daughter, or how about cousin, Jennifer? You know she looks exactly like me."
"Yeah. But what am I gonna do with the pretty dress that I bought you?"
"God! What have I told you about me and dresses- THEY DO NOT MIX! I don't know give it to some hobo."
"Where am I going to find a hobo."
"The internet."
"I thought hobos do not have computers."
"I don't know, I'm not a hobo."
"Please join us for our family Christmas gathering." Mom said in a sweet but irritated tone.
"Okay…but I am NOT wearing that dress!"
"Yes you are. This is a dressy event and I spent good money on the dress."
"I will go to the 'fun' Christmas party- IF I get to wear what I want."
"Okay. Be ready by six o' clock. Please make sure your shirt is appropriate and does not offend anybody."
"Okay, Mom."
"No friends. No cursing. No acting like a savage, your father is a very respected man. Instead of saying 'Yeah' or 'Duh'. Please use 'Yes ma'am', 'No, ma'am', 'Yes sir' No sir'. Afterwards, please help the maid clean-up."
"Yes ma'am."
"So were understand each other. I'll see you at six o' clock. Please get dressed."