Some Things Never Change
This is a little one-shot idea that arose out of my love of Wordy and Spike and how much it killed me that they were fighting at the end of "Fault Lines." Speaking of which: SPOILERS FOR "FAULT LINES." Sorry about the caps, but I feel like it's necessary to warn people. Just a little credit where it's due: I got the idea for the setting from psyscaper's awesome story "Critical Disappointment." If you didn't figure it out, I still don't own Flashpoint. I'd love reviews and feedback, I'm working on incorporating more imagery and thoughts into my stories, so let me know how I'm doing.
He found himself sitting on the familiar grass without even realizing how he'd gotten there. He remembered his day (though he wished he'd been able to forget it), and he remembered going home and beginning the familiar dance with his father; he would enter a room, his father would leave the room, and so it continued. He remembered walking out the door and he remembered walking the streets but he somehow ended up here.
"Guess it makes sense really," He said aloud. "no one else could ever understand," He stretched out his legs and rubbed his achy knees. "no one except you, buddy." Spike said as a slight breeze picked up a few loose leafs and blew them in Spike's direction. One of the leafs caught on the simple grey headstone and he leaned forward to push is off. He traced his finger over the inscription, feeling the letters beneath his calloused fingers. "Lewis Young." He looked at the ground sadly as he leaned back and adjusted the bandage on his left hand. There were small dots of blood showing through the layers of gauze and it crossed his mind that he should probably change the bandage but he didn't move to leave.
"I know, Lew. I shouldn't have freaked out on him. I mean, it's Wordy, I don't think he has a mean bone in his body." Spike smiled a bit as he thought about Wordy. He was a big, intimidating guy when you put him in full gear but the real Wordy was the one that watched cooking shows and played dolls with his girls and hated killing the bugs that they managed to find hiding in the corners of the room. "I just snapped out there, I don't know what happened." Spike put his head down as he felt guilt overwhelm him.
He sat in silence, deep in thought. Sure, he had offers at other agencies, but the Team was more than a job to him. He needed the stability, the connection with people who cared about him, especially since his father made it painfully obvious that a connection would not be possible as long as he kept his job. Family had always been such a huge part of his life and now, as one family ceased talking to him, another seemed to be fracturing.
"That psych eval...that was bad, Lew." Spike said as he made a fist with his good hand and slammed it into the soft ground. "Why would Greg do that to us, we were fine?" Spike said angrily to the breeze as he squeezed his fingers into fists and then released them again. He felt the cut on his hand opening and felt the sting move up his arm and wrist but he didn't care. The sun was starting to sink lower and Spike watched the sky turn orange as a slight chill reached him. He ran his hand up and down his exposed arm and tried to warm up, not wanting to leave yet.
"Spike...?" He heard his name from behind him and froze for an instant before putting his hands at his sides and turning a bit to look over his shoulder.
"Wordy...what're you doing here?" Spike asked in what he hoped came across as a nonchalant tone. He didn't want to be angry at Wordy, he hated that they'd fought, but at the same time Spike almost felt as if his spot, his safe haven, had been breached. While his tone seemed to be casual, his eyes were telling a different story. His eyes yelled, you're not supposed to be here.
"We've been trying to get in touch with you all afternoon Spike," Wordy said with a bit of concern in his voice. Spike closed his eyes for an instant as he reached into his pocket and looked at his cell phone. The volume was all the way down on silent and he scrolled through the missed calls and messages.
"What's up?" He said as he looked through the missed calls and the multiple texts. "Looks like you guys have been alternating calling me." He said with a fake smile. Wordy stood with his right hand in the pocket of his coat, his left hand held a large blue sweatshirt. He stepped forward and held out the sweatshirt for Spike.
"It's getting chilly, you should put that on." Wordy said as Spike pulled the hoodie over his head. By the time he got the sweatshirt on and rubbed some warmth into his arms, Wordy had sat down a few feet away from him on the other side of Lew's grave. He looked at the headstone sadly before lowering his head and looking at the grass. His hands were still in his pockets as he took a breath and looked up at Spike.
"I know it's been a long day, Spike." He said softly, obviously trying to wrestle with something weighting heavily on his mind. Spike nodded and also took a deep breath.
"I'm sorry I snapped at you on the obstacle course, Wordy." He blurted out quickly. Wordy looked like he was about to interject but Spike continued. "I know you didn't mean to break the ladder and I know that you helped me over, I was just...I don't know...the psych eval really rattled me and I took it out on you." Spike bit his lip and shook his head a bit in shame. He looked at the grass, now a dark green color as the sun continued to sink in the sky. They sat in silence for a few moments as their shadows elongated over the open cemetery.
"I hear ya," Wordy said as he folded his legs and put his hands on his knees. "Toth...he really knew what buttons to push." He said as he looked down at his hands again for the umpteenth time that day. He tried to keep his face calm but the fear and the emotion was beginning to show through. Spike looked at him carefully, making sure the shadows weren't deceiving him.
"You okay, Wordy?" Spike asked with some urgency in his voice. Wordy hesitated a long moment before shaking his head subtly.
"Listen Spike," Wordy said with a heavy voice. "the reason we were all calling you was because...well," Wordy shook his head again and took a deep breath. "Ed was shot on his way to the hospital. The bullet hit his shoulder and embedded in the bone. The doctors have him in surgery but they said it would be a while." Wordy somehow got the words out even as millions or other thoughts seemed to cycle through his mind. He felt like insanity was fast approaching as he tried to clear his head of all the obtrusive thoughts and worries.
Spike didn't react to the news at first, he sat where he was and looked towards the sun as it made its way towards the horizon. I wish time would stop. He said to himself. He shook his head as he made fists with his hands again, drawing up more blood to stain the bandages of his left hand. He punched the ground again and then pulled his knees towards his chest. Wordy watched him carefully and tried to patiently wait for Spike to speak.
"Damn it!" Spike yelled into the wind. Wordy jumped a bit at the sudden exclamation but calmed his nerves as he turned a bit more towards Spike. His hands were squeezed tightly into fists as he continued to yell. "Lew steps on a freakin land mine! Mac gets shot by drug dealers! Ed gets shot going to the hospital to see his wife deliver their baby! And my Dad-" Spike suddenly cut off the sentence as he punched the ground again, this time angry that he'd let his secret slip again. Wordy looked at him with concern, almost trying to encourage him to go on.
"Spike...what about your dad?" Wordy asked softly. He was nearly panicked at the implication that something was wrong in Spike's family and no one knew about it. Spike was their happy-go-lucky guy, their peacekeeper, the way that they remained sane on some stressful calls; the idea that just beneath the surface there was so much unaddressed anger and sadness worried Wordy. Spike looked at him sadly before turning his gaze to the ground and nearly whispering.
"He's dying." He said softly. Wordy wanted to interject but he knew better. "End stage lung cancer." Spike kept his eyes trained to the grass below his feet.
"I...I don't know what to say, Spike." Wordy said softly. He couldn't believe that no one had known about the turmoil in Spike's life. Spike nodded but his eyes didn't move from the ground.
"He's not talking to me." He continued softly. "He refuses to talk to me until I quit the SRU." Wordy felt like he'd been punched in the stomach, he couldn't breath. "And leave it to Toth to get that one out of me...right after he made me relive the call where Lew..." Spike put his face in his hands and tried to control his breathing, tried to keep himself calm.
Wordy sat in shock for a few minutes. He didn't know what to say or what to do, he was blinded by anger temporarily. The fury was distributed between Toth for making Spike relive the worst moments of his life, Spike's father for being so cruel to his son, Greg for making them go through all this, and himself for not seeing any of the signs. He took a few deep breaths and tried to calm his racing mind. He knew his anger wasn't grounded, wasn't rational. Toth was doing his job (even if he was an asshole), Spike's father obviously cared about him and worried about him but didn't know how to handle that, Greg was trying to do the best he could for the team, and Wordy...well Wordy wouldn't let himself off the hook that easily.
"Wordy..." Spike broke him out of his mind as he looked at Wordy's shaking hand. He quickly shoved his right hand into his pocket and tried to hide the obvious quiver. "What's with that?" Spike asked, concern now heavy in his voice. Wordy felt the breath catch in his throat as he hesitated.
"I..." He took a few deep breaths before shaking his head. "The focus of Toth's attention." He said bitterly as he pulled his hand out of his jacket and held it midair along with his left hand. After a few seconds his right hand began to twitch and Wordy closed his eyes before lowering his hands and placing them on his knees. Spike looked at him, his mouth open slightly as he waited for Wordy to say something.
"I...I don't know what it is." He said softly as he looked away from Spike. "I noticed that my gun scores were getting worse and...I don't know...I wrote it off that I wasn't sleeping much but...but now I'm not sure..." He struggled to get out the words as he looked towards Lou's headstone again. Shadows were forming around the cemetery as the sun sank partially below the horizon. After a few minutes of silence, Spike spoke.
"My turn to not know what to say." He said softly with a sad smile. Wordy nodded.
"I guess this is why neither of us are primarily negotiators." Wordy offered the same smile and Spike nodded. They sat in silence for a few minutes until a low buzzing came from Wordy's pocket. He looked at the phone and then at Spike before pressing a button and putting it to his ear. The cemetery was silent and Spike was able to hear Greg's voice on the other end of the phone.
"Wordy, where are you? Did you find Spike?" Greg asked urgently.
"Yeah, Boss. I'm with Spike now." Wordy said simply into the phone. He was trying not to hate Greg for bringing the team into Hell but it would take a little time for him to forgive him completely. He heard Greg sigh in evident relief on the other end of the phone.
"Good. Good, I was getting really worried." Greg said with relief saturating his tone. "Where are you guys?" Wordy hesitated a moment, not missing the worried look Spike had on his face.
"We're fine, Sarge. I'll call you when we're on our way to the hospital." He said in a tone that was meant to close the conversation. He knew that Greg wanted to know where they were and the reason for Spike not picking up his phone for hours but Wordy left no room for arguing. "I'll talk to you soon, Boss." He said as he hung up. He felt a little badly for hanging up on Greg, he knew that he was worried about all of them but Spike's deep breaths and calmer posture proved to him that his actions were justified.
"Thanks." Spike said softly. Wordy nodded.
"No problem, buddy." They fell into silence for a few minutes and watched the sun move closer to the horizon, only a third of it left in view.
"How did you find me?" Spike asked curiously. Wordy smiled sadly again and looked at Lew's headstone before speaking.
"Some things never change, Spike." He said knowingly. "We can say all we want that people change and sometimes they do, but..." Wordy thought for a moment before continuing. "...but on tough days you and Lew would go out and get a pizza and get drunk watching the Discovery channel." Spike smiled at the memories as he tried to keep a tear from his eye. "I figured that a day as tough as today was...well it just seemed like this is where I'd find you." Wordy said as he saw tears in Spike's eyes.
He took a breath and shifted his body over a few feet closer to Spike so they were only inches apart. He put his arm around Spike's shoulders and pulled him closer to his body. Spike was trying and failing to contain his tears as they came with shuddery breaths. Wordy held him close as he felt tears come to his own eyes for an instant. He blinked them away and watched the only remaining sliver of sun drop below the horizon. Spike shook in his arms with renewed tears and the new cold that came with nightfall. He held Spike tightly against his own body and hoped that maybe, through the tears seeping into his coat, he could absorb some of the pain that Spike had carried in silence for so long.
Hmmm, not sure how much I like this one either. I don't know, there's not much of a resolution but I don't want to take it any further, I feel like the ending is suiting. Okay, please give me some feedback and constructive criticism please. I'm trying to work on descriptive imagery and incorporating character's thoughts into the story and the dialogue that way when I write longer things it'll be easier and less forced. So, you have you assignment, tell me how to get better...please...