Chapter 1

Warning(s): Negative!thoughts, OOC's

Notes: "Japanese" Thinking

Disclaimer: I do not own Katekyo Hitman Reborn; Amano Akira does. If I did, it would be more sadder and dark.

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Insecurities. Tsuna was filled with them.

Everybody wondered how he managed to remain unaffected with taunts, jeers and hateful remarks continuously thrown toward him for 9 years straight. Ever since he was five, the name "Dame-Tsuna" started to circulate. At first, it was nothing but a joke but as the days passed, it became something hurtful.

Everyone thought he ignored it all and lived to keep his mother company. That he never cared at all for what people said. It was only a cover up for him to say that he went to school to see Sasagawa Kyoko. He never wanted to go but he didn't wanted to trouble his mother.

The truth was he was affected... and severely.

How could he ignore everything when he was ridiculed and unwanted everywhere he went? Even his own mother accepted the fact that he was useless and no-good.

"I'm not saying you have to go to a good high school or college, you know."

She never knew that those simple words made him feel like not trying anything. Even if she meant no harm, she would hurt him in the most unpredictable ways. She even called him her 'useless son.'

-It hurts... and it hurts a lot.

So he pushed people apart unconsciously. He didn't wanted to get attached no matter how much he was craving for it. All because he didn't wanted to get hurt... because it hurt the most when he would be betrayed by the people he cared about the most.

That's why he was scared when... the baby wearing a fedora came knocking at the door.

Tsuna started at the scene in front of him with unreadable eyes. It's been two years since he's broken the Arcobaleno curse and now he's 16. All the arcobaleno have been growing up normally in the past two years too. If normally means the fact that they have random growth spurts of who knows how many years out of nowhere, then yes everything was normal.

Currently, an 18 year old amused Reborn was sitting at the side, watching the scene unfold. Every single one of his guardians were there too. It was the rare day that everybody decided to hang out today. Yes, even Hibari and he even allowed to hang out in his office!

At the moment Gokudera was doing a dogeza in front of him again for some reason that Tsuna failed to understand while everyone else was merely looking at them with amusement.

How did this happen? When had this happen? Was it when Reborn came along or was it when he first met Gokudera? Either way, Tsuna just couldn't keep up anymore.

They trusted him... people trusted him Dame-Tsuna. Why? Why aren't they treating him like everyone else. What's so great about him? Just why is this happening?

"I'm so sorry, Jyuudaime! I shall commit seppuku for my careless mistake!" Gokudera's voice snapped Tsuna out of his stupor as he watched Gokudera horridly bang his head on the floor.

"Maa maa Gokudera. It's fine -"

"Shut up yakyuu-baka!" Gokudera screamed at Yamamoto who was trying to settle this down but was failing badly.

"Kufufu, what a loyal puppy," Mukuro commented from the side to which Hibari snorted in agreement.

"Shut up!"

Tsuna on the other hand remained eerily silent with his bangs covering his expression. Usually by now, Tsuna would have stopped the bomber from fighting and apologizing but he was rather quiet today.

"...Why?" he asked in a quiet voice that stopped everyone's conversation. It sounded so broken and.. hollow. So unlike their usual boss that they had to just stop and listen. Even Reborn was looking at his student with calculating eyes. Something wasn't right and they knew it.

"Eh?" Gokudera said dumbly

Yamamoto smiled lightly, "Why what, Tsuna?"

Reborn looked at his student with a raised eyebrow. He could feel that his student has been hiding something from him and it has been troubling him for the past few days but he couldn't figure it out. It made him realize for the first time that even Tsuna could hide things he didn't wanted to know. Even from the World's Greatest Hitman.

"Why do you keep..." he trailed, looking at them with blank eyes that really startled everyone. Tsuna always had emotions swirling in his eyes and the fact that they were blank right now, was really creepy for them.

"Jyuudaime?" Gokudera asked worried for his boss.

"...No, nothing."

"Jyuud-"

"I'm going home," Tsuna said cutting Gokudera off mid-sentence. Picking up his things, Tsuna made his way to the door. And without waiting for anyone's reply, Tsuna left leaving his tutor and his guardians alone.

Turning to the 18 year old hitman, Yamamoto asked, "Reborn-san, what's going on with Tsuna? He was like..." he trailed off but everyone understood what the baseball lover wanted to say. Tsuna was acting dead...

Reborn frowned, "There's something troubling him but he isn't saying anything. I'll try finding out but you keep a look out too."

[Night]

Reborn lay on the bed next to Tsuna. Ever since he started having his irregular growth spurts, Nana bought a bigger bed for them since Reborn was adamant about watching over his student.

He was thinking how to get Tsuna to reveal what he is hiding when a soft yet empty voice startled him out of his musings.

"Ne, Reborn..." Tsuna asked as he turned to face him. Reborn had to frown at the look in his student's eyes. It was as though he was there but not exactly.

"What is it, Dame-Tsuna?"

"Why?"

Reborn rolled his eyes in exasperation as he sat up and had his student do the same. "Why what, Dame-Tsuna? A mafia boss has to be articulate," he smirked seeing if he could draw the same reaction he would but frowned when he saw that the brunet didn't even react. Usually, he would refuse vehemently that he doesn't wants to be a mafia boss.

"Why aren't you treating me normally?"

Reborn blinked for a second before he said, "We are treating you no-"

"No, you aren't!"

Reborn was mildly surprised with the force that Tsuna said that. His frown returned as he looked at his student. There was still no emotion in the brunet's eyes but... it was the first thing that he reacted to with such emotion. He was also mad that the brunet cut him off but he needed to be patient. He could punish him later.

"What do you mean by that, Dame-Tsuna? How else should we trea-"

"Why are all of you treating me like some kind of God? I'm Dame-Tsuna!" he replied, once again cutting off Reborn. Reborn really wanted to strangle the brunet in front of him but he blinked when the sentence registered in his brain.

Frowning, he said, "Tsuna, you are not dame. You have improved."

Tsuna remained silent for a while before saying, "You're lying." It was so soft that Reborn had to strain his ears to listen to the brunet. "You're lying," he repeated in a louder voice.

"Tsuna-"

"You're lying! All of you are the same! It's just a farce.. just a farce," he mumbled at the end. It was as though he was trying to convince himself something.

"All of you are the same... it's just a..." Tsuna looked down and was lost in his thoughts while Reborn was just confused. Something was troubling Tsuna and it was making him unstable and he needed answers, damn it!

"Tsuna, what do you mean?" he asked slowly as to not startle the teen.

His answer was only met with silence but after a second, he replied, "You all are all pretending... you will all betray me. You will all realize it soon... it won't be long."

Reborn was startled at that. Looking at the brunet in front of him, he frowned. We will all betray him? Why does he thinks that? Unless..

"We won't betray you, Tsuna. Why would you think that?" Reborn asked his student. He needed to know if it was what he thinks it is.

Tsuna gave a hollow laugh. Reborn inwardly winced; he didn't like seeing his student like this. It was upsetting.

"You know, I hate you Reborn. You came into my life and brought so many people for me to get attached to. It hurts you know, listening to the taunts and jeers of those students claiming that I payed them to be my friends," Tsuna said with tears flowing out of his eyes. No, I don't hate Reborn... but I hate him for making me suffer like this.

Ever since Tsuna was young, he was always alone; separated because of his clumsiness. He wanted to talk to people; to interact with them but nobody did. Why? Why was he different? He wanted friends; somebody to lean on and trust. He found them when Reborn came but how long? How long until they realize that it's pointless to rely on him?

He always distanced himself and built up a wall. A wall that wouldn't make him that depressed when they would leave him in the future. He knew he shouldn't get used to the presences of his friends but it hurt when he built a wall. He wanted it to break but was afraid. Afraid that if he did break the wall then there would be nothing to protect him from the betrayal that will surely come.

What was it about him that made them stay with him? Nothing. He had nothing to offer so why? Why were they trusting him so much?

Reborn frowned and was about to say something when he was interrupted, "Did you really think that I wouldn't be affected by all of it? I was young, Reborn. The age where we would listen to it." Tsuna gave another hollow laugh before continuing, "Did you know that it hurts when you are betrayed by the people you care about? I've been through a lot Reborn so what makes you think that none of you will betray me? That this isn't a farce?"

"Tsun-"

"My own mother doesn't believes in me," he exclaimed as he was pulled into an embrace by the hitman. "She knows I'm useless. My own father refused to come home! Why? Was it because of my uselessness? Is that why he never came home and used work as a cover up? Tell me Reborn," he said, holding onto the hitman like a lifeline. "Why? Why aren't any of you treating me like normal? Are you trying to break me? If so, just leave me alone!"

By now, tears were rolling down Tsuna's face. He didn't understand; why were they staying with him? What was special about him that only they could see? Why aren't they treating him like the bullies?

Is it their plan to betray him after they have gained my trust? Are they just plotting this? Just like him?

"Ne, Reborn, I'm scared... scared of being trusted. I don't like... I'm not used to it. Please stop trusting me. Treat me the same! Please! I beg of you!" Tsuna wailed by the end. He wrapped his hands around Reborn's neck and cried his eyes out while pleading to treat him the same.

Reborn merely sighed as he tightened his hold on his unstable student, "Tsuna I'm not going to treat you the same. You are my son and I don't approve of this behavior. Your friends trust you and will never betray you and if they do, I'll be the one to make them suffer."

Reborn could feel his student stiffening before burrowing his head into his neck. He could feel the tears dropping and he could do nothing but look at his student with sad eyes. He could hear the pleads to leave him alone but he ignored those. His student had affected him very much and he could very well say that he was his sky.

And damn it, he wasn't going to let his sky, his son to suffer because of those idiots. He was also to blame himself to not notice something like this:

-His student was broken and needed help.

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Author's Note: Hey guys, a new fanfic for you all to read! Did you guys notice that all my fanfics have been sad and depressing at times?

Remember More Reviews = More Motivation.