Broken will
Night keeps on falling all around me. Cheerful voices become distant whispers and peaceful dreams turn into twisted nightmares. Everything has become nothing. It now means nothing to me. It hurts knowing the truth; the bloody truth. It haunts me in my sleep and toys with me when I'm awake; a distorted reality that I can never truly escape from.
I remember a young girl called Misa-chan, she was human. She once said to me 'Alive yet never truly awake'. At the time I didn't know what she meant but now I do. I feel dead; empty inside like a broken puppet. Centuries have passed and I have watched as tears have fallen. Over the years the people I once cared about turned into dust. So long ago! Now they are just distant memories that have come and passed yet I still remain.
Everything feels like it has come crashing down, bit by bit and then all at once. Even though I want to cry from the sadness I'm afraid to. I'm afraid that if I cry that first tear then I will not be able to stop. Why is my existence so tragic? It's painful! I feel like I am being swallowed up by the disfigured, long, dark shadows that lurk around every corner.
I won't make a sound because I know that no one can hear me and even if they do they will block out my sounds as if they never heard a thing for I am the very thing that they pity yet fear; a pureblood vampire. There have been so many times that I have tried to end my very existence but fate won't let me die. I don't want to live this existence alone but there is no one so all I can do is sleep to drift off into darkness and forget everything. When I wake from my deep sleeps, all the sadness comes back to me, leaving me to roam and wonder the nights endlessly. It makes me want to never wake up again. Why bother? I have lost my purpose too.
"Onii-sama, Kaname Onii-sama" Yuuki called as she crawled onto my lap, distracting me from my distant memories. "Yes Yuuki" I smiled. "Onii-sama, please don't be sad. Onii-sama's got Yuuki" Yuuki smiled back then hugged me. "I know Yuuki but I'm not sad since your here" I warmly replied. Yuuki beamed happily in return. "Onii-sama, please can you read Yuuki a story, I like the one about the sun with all it's pretty colours" Yuuki thoughtful said as she snuggled closer to me, her Onii-sama. "Anything for my Yuuki, my gentle princess" I whispered, planting a kiss on her forehead. You're my dearest sister, fiancé and future wife. The words were so fitting. Everything at the moment seemed so perfect that I wanted it to last forever. I will make it last forever; Yuuki I will protect you. Yuuki just giggled in return, snuggling close to me as she could. "Now then, let's begin the story. Once upon a time..."
Authors note:
Thank you for reading and I hope that it made sense. Please review and comment. Thank you.