As you probably have already figured out, I do not own, nor will I ever own, anything to do with MASH. If I did, I'd be sitting in the Bahamas with five well-muscled men feeding me rum-flavored drinks!

Yes, I may have some factual errors with the show, mainly with minor characters. Don't hate me for it . . . . or hate me for it. Whatever. Keeps life interesting!

Now, on with the show!

************************************

Jessie held on to the side of the dirty jeep for dear life. Although they weren't speeding, the ruts and turns in the road made her feel like her insides were being flipped out of place.

"Um . . .Sergeant?" she yelled into the wind, grabbing at her duffle as it was almost slung into a ditch, "You think you could perhaps slow down just a bit?"

"Sorry ma'am, no can do." He glanced over his right shoulder at his passenger. "North Koreans have been sighted in the area and an attack's going on in the next sector. If we slow down, snipers can get a better whack at us."

Jessie paled and swallowed. She didn't reply, but did find herself trying to peek into the fields and trees on either side as they flew crazily down the road. She realized that it wasn't potholes, but holes where artillery had previously exploded.

Callahan, what have you done?

If the condition of the road was any indication, Jessie knew that her destination probably would not be anything on this side of habitable.

She was right. As they flew underneath the sign – "MASH 4077 Best Care Anywhere" she hurriedly read, - the drabness of the place struck her first. Everything was the same ugly olive green that her uniform, the jeep and her duffle bag. The only spots of color were people in white coats rushing around checking people lying on the ground.

And the blood. You couldn't miss it.

The jeep squealed to a stop right next to a blonde effortlessly giving orders. The woman jumped at the noise and jerked towards the Sergeant.

"Watch where you're going you buffoon!" she practically screamed. She didn't wait for a reply but focused her steely eyes on Jessie, who was trying to gather her wits and her baggage.

"You!"

Jessie saw the clusters on the nurse's uniform and jumped.

The nurse didn't wait for her to reply. "Get to pre-op and scrub!"

Jessie, still standing in the jeep, saluted the major as was drilled in her head when she joined the Army. "Yes, ma'am!" She turned to lug at her duffle bag.

"Forgot that, and get going!" the Major yelled.

Obediently, Jessie stopped what she was doing and jumped from the jeep.

"Don't worry, Lieutenant, I'll make sure your gear gets stored," the Sergeant whispered as Jessie ran by. He smiled and winked at her, and she found herself smiling back. "Good luck." He never could resist a pretty girl.

"Thanks," Jessie said over her shoulder. "I think I'll need it."

During the next 16 hours, Jessie seriously doubted her sanity of leaving her pampered life for this place. She was assigned to a fairly nice doctor in surgery, for which she was glad. Her nursing skills consisted of six weeks of training by the Army and many a night spent up with a flashlight under the blanket going over and over nursing handbooks. Patience was appreciated.

"Scalpel," Hunnicutt ordered.

Jessie grabbed it and stuck it in his blood-covered hand.

"So, you're new here at the OK Corral, aren't you?"

Jessie handed him so 4-0 silk, watching his work intently. "I actually just got here, and a Major put me right to work."

"Ah, yes. That must be Major Margaret 'Hotlips' Houlihan, star of stage, screen and OR."

"Hotlips?" she whispered, mainly because the Major was standing nearby. No need making the boss mad.

"Just a little nickname she has earned for herself at our humble abode. Not that I would know, of course."

"Why wouldn't you know, Captain?" Jessie asked, watching him expertly sew up a wound. Jessie figured he could have his pick of women.

"Because I am happily married to a wonderful girl in Mill Valley, California. And my father named me B.J., not Captain."

"Ah, monogamy," a dark-haired surgeon at the next table said flippantly. "Such a lonely existence in such a world filled with lovely young ladies."

"Pierce, would you shut up!" Major Houlihan ordered. "I happen to find married life quite wonderful."

Pierce rolled his eyes. "How soon we forget, since you certainly never let us." He received an angry stare in return.

"I happen to find nothing wrong with monogamy," Jessie joined in. "Worked just fine for my parents." All the banter in the room surprised her, but she found it kept her from thinking about her aching feet.

"Well, Pierce, I guess that leaves you out of the picture," another surgeon called from across the room, rather arrogantly.

Pierce just laughed and looked at Jessie. "You say that now, sweetheart, but just wait until after this session is over."

Jessie's eyes widened at the sight of blood shooting from a patient. The arrogant surgeon cursed and stemmed the flow of blood.

"Wh-what's going to happen after this is over?" she asked, looking away from the scene and focusing on B.J.'s patient.

The scene there wasn't much better.

B.J. was methodically digging shrapnel out of some poor kid's stomach. Jessie swallowed and tried to pretend that they were dummies they practiced on in the States.

"Why, you are going to have a private welcome to the 4077th, complete with wine, champagne and myself." He finished sewing. "Hey, I need another lucky contestant!" he called to the orderlies, who immediately came rushing in.

"I'd rather not, Hawkeye" Jessie retorted, handing B.J. some more silk. She had heard about the infamous Benjamin Franklin "Hawkeye" Pierce's ways while at the 8063rd and wouldn't touch that with a 10 foot pole! She was finished with womanizers.

"Hey, how'd you know?" Hawkeye asked, focusing on her with his dark blue eyes. "I thought you were new here."

"You're reputation precedes you, Doctor."

Hawkeye smiled. Although it was hidden by his mask, Jessie could see it in his eyes. "That's too bad. I've always had a thing for redheads."

Before Jessie could reply, Major Houlihan did. "Colonel Potter, please tell Pierce to stop corrupting my nurses before they're even here 24 hours!" she shrilled. "And stop all this chatter while you're at it!"

"Major, it looks to me like he's crashed and burned with this one, so just let him suffer in silence," an older doctor nearby replied, winking at Jessie, who was relieved. The last thing she needed was to get in trouble with the obviously strict head nurse. "We still have some paperwork to finish filling out, Lt. Callahan, so come by my office as soon as this round is over."

"Yes sir," Jessie replied. So far, everyone seemed fairly nice.

Maybe this won't be so bad after all.

********************************************

Jessie had never been so tired in her life. Because she was new, she was assigned to post-op immediately after surgery, which gave her another 8 hours on her feet. The doctor on duty with her was the arrogant one from surgery, Charles Emerson Winchester the Third. He never left off The Third. Mainly, all he did was grumble, and Jessie stayed out of his way. Nurses Kelleye and Bigelow, who were also in post-op, told her that he had only been here about a month and was still none too happy about it.

Thank goodness the nurses were nice.

"So, where did you work before the war?" Kellye asked as they did their rounds.

"I, well, I um - wasn't."

"Did you just finish nursing school?" Kellye checked the bandage on a patient.

"Well, not exactly," Jessie replied, massaging her sore neck with her fingers. "Everything I know, I learned in six weeks."

Kelleye's eyes widened. "Six weeks! Wow!" Jessie glanced at her and expected the nurse to be a little skeptical. "You know, I never would have guessed."

Jessie didn't realize she was holding her breath, waiting for an answer. She also didn't realize how much she wanted these people to like her.

And not like me for my money.

"Well, it's not like a huge amount of talent is needed for this kind of surgery, anyway." She had been told that time and time again, but didn't believe it. Until today. "I also helped out at a veterinarian's office when I was growing up, even assisting in some surgeries." Jessie smiled, thinking about the whiskered Dr. Bennett. "Since there're more horses and cattle in Texas than people, his services were in demand."

"Hey, I'm from Texas, too!" Bigelow said from behind Jessie. "San Antonio." She held out her hand, and Jessie shook it.

"Dallas." Jessie sighed. "I already miss it."

"Yeah, me too. What made you decide to join the Army? Why not go to nursing school instead?"

Mainly because my father would have yanked me out of nursing school once he found out, but all the money in the world couldn't fight the US of A. And then there was Mark. . .

"I just wanted to do something more, to be useful." She glanced around the bustling post-op. "I hope I didn't get in over my head."

"You'll do fine," Kelleye said. "You've already passed the test of staying away from our illustrious Hawkeye Pierce."

"Yeah, you're doing better than I did," Bigelow said, rolling her eyes. "Wasn't here for 48 hours before I fell for that." The three nurses laughed.

The next shift came in to take over, and Jessie realized how tired she was. But she wasn't finished yet. She trudged towards the door, but discovered she didn't know exactly where Col. Potter's office was. She turned, but Kelleye and Bigelow were gone. However, Charles was still giving Hawkeye a run-down of the patients for his shift.

Jessie chose grumpiness instead of lasciviousness.

"Excuse me, Major?" she asked as Charles turned towards the door. "Could you tell me where Col. Potter's office is?"

He turned to face her. Surprisingly, he smiled, his eyes appraising her kindly. "Just go through that door over there, and you'll be in the clerk's office."

Jessie, slightly taken aback by his friendliness, smiled back. "Thank you, Major," she said and maneuvered her way back through post op.

Charles watched her go.

Something about her is so familiar, but I can't place her. I've never set foot in Texas, thank God, so I really don't know why . . .

"Nice view, isn't it, Chuckles?" Hawkeye leered.

"Thank God your boorish behavior isn't contagious, or we'd all be in trouble."

**************************************************

Jessie hoped the paperwork wouldn't be too much. She didn't think she could keep her eyes open much longer. Plus, she didn't even know where her tent was. Or her things, for that matter. She quickened her step as she pushed through the door, thinking the faster she could get this over with, the sooner she could get some sleep.

Unfortunately, someone else was also coming through the door from the other side. Papers flew everywhere as they skidded to a stop.

"Oh, I'm so sorry!" She stepped back abruptly, kneeling down to pick up the forms that were fluttering about.

"Col. Potter tells me I need to slow down sometimes, but I . . ." He trailed off as their hands touched while grabbing for the same errant sheet.

Jessie, embarrassed from the incident, glanced at him as he watched her intently. "Um . . . hi. I was just bringing you these papers to fill out."

"I was just coming in here to fill them out."

So far, neither one of them had moved, both still kneeling on the floor.

But, through his dirty Army-issue glasses, Jessie thought he had the kindest eyes she had ever seen.

The door on the other side of the room flew open. "Radar! I can't find my blasted pen anywhere!" Col. Potter sputtered.

They both jumped.

"Sorry, sir, it's in my desk. You wanted me to find a way to refill the ink," the Corporal said, breaking his and Jessie's gaze and gathering up the rest of the papers. "Oh, by the way, this is the new nurse we requested." He shuffled over to his desk, and motioned towards her, blushing.

Jessie picked herself up from the floor and saluted.

"At ease. Yes, I saw you in surgery today, err, yesterday," Col. Potter said, eyeing his company clerk, who seemed unusually engrossed in putting his paperwork in order. "Good work."

She relaxed. "Thank you, sir. I don't think I had much of a choice but to get to work once Major Houlihan got hold of me."

Col. Potter chuckled. "Yes, she's our little spitfire, that one." He turned to the Corporal, still engrossed in his paperwork. "Radar, I need . . ."

"Here's the Lieutenant's paperwork, sir, and here's your pen. Since you have a meeting to attend, she can fill out the paperwork in here."

"Err, right," Col. Potter said, handing the paperwork to a startled Jessie.

The corporal pulled out a chair at a messy desk, sweeping piles of paperwork into a basket on his desk. Jessie realized that it was for her and obediently sat. He mumbled something about the supply tent and practically ran out the door, leaving her alone. She watched the door swing a minute.

Did he really just read the Colonel's mind?

She shook her head and started the arduous task of completing Army paperwork.

After half an hour, Jessie finally filled out all the information the Army decided it had to have. Before she could sign the last form in triplicate, the door swung open, and Radar walked in whistling with an arm full of papers. He immediately stopped, startled, when he saw her.

"Oh, I thought you would be finished," he said, laying the stacks down at the corner of his desk. He thrust his hands in his pockets.

"I am now," she said, dotting the last i on her name. She laid down the pen and stood up, sticking out her hand. They were about the same height. Hesitantly, he took her hand.

"Since we haven't been formally introduced, I'm Jessie. Sorry again about the door incident."

He smiled. "I'm Walter, but everyone calls me Radar. And that's OK. I should have looked where I was going." They stood with their hands clasped for a moment. Realization dawning, he pulled away and saluted her.

Jessie burst out laughing. "Oh, please don't!" she said between giggles. "I sure didn't ask to be an officer, even a lowly lieutenant."

He relaxed.

She crossed her arms over her chest, curious about what had happened earlier. "I honestly don't think I have ever met anyone that knows what others will say."

Radar blushed. "I've just always been able to know what people are going to say before they say it," he said, shrugging. "Sometimes I even hear what they don't say."

"Really?"

"Really."

Jessie studied him for a moment. "Everyone?"

"Mostly. Oh, but not you. I - wouldn't want to pry or anything."

Jessie got a good laugh at that one. But, all of the activity over the past day finally caught up with her. She had been up for over 24 hours and had come to the end of her rope.

Radar, ever the physic, reached out to grab her arm as she paled.

"I'm sorry, I should have realized you've been up that long," he said, setting her down on the edge of a cot.

Jessie was too tired to realize he had read her mind, despite his earlier claim.

"Let me go see if your tent is ready." He bustled out the door.

He returned 15 minutes later. "There wasn't any room in the nurses' tent, so you'll have a small tent to yourself, but since you're an officer, that's. . .," he stopped in the doorway. Jessie was curled up on his cot, sound asleep. He smiled and gathered up the blanket at the end of cot, laying it carefully on her, as she began to snore.

"Hey, Radar, where's that morphine?" Hawkeye called, marching through the door way. "Oh, ho, what have we here?" He crossed his arms and rolled back on his heels. "Radar, did you know you have a sleeping woman in your bed?"

Radar jumped back with a guilty look on his face. Even though he didn't really have anything to be guilty about. Jessie didn't even stir. "Shhh, you'll wake her up! I left her in here to see if her tent was ready, and she fell asleep." Radar rambled. He reached under the pile of papers he had brought in and handed a box labeled "Morphine" to Hawkeye as he talked.

Hawkeye watching Radar amusedly, took the box from the corporal. "So, where will you sleep? In the nurses' tent?"

Radar gave Hawkeye a dirty look.

Hawkeye shrugged. "Just a thought."

"I have work to do anyway," he said and sat down at his desk.

Hawkeye, knowing he had been dismissed, chuckled to himself as he sauntered back into post-op.