It's dark outside, the common room is empty, and the girls of my dorm are fast asleep. I sneak out of bed and put a pair of thick socks, the marble stones of Slytherin common room are always very cold. I walk out of the common room and walk through the dungeons. One to the left, another to the right, and I'm already at the girls bathroom. I'm sweating, too much, and my vision is blurry. I run toward a cabin and lean my head over the seat. I know it's bad, but I can't help it, when I'm too stressed I have to let it out.
I hear footsteps entering the bathroom. We are not supposed to be in the dungeons by night, I calmly and silently put my socks off and barefoot I find equilibrium on the wooden panels separating the cabins. That way, if someone looks under the door, they won't see anything.
"Is that you Malicia?" A male voice says "are you feeling sick again?"
I slowly climb down the walls and flush the toilet. I open the door and I'm nose to nose with Severus. He's tall now, at least to feet taller than I am, but I remember when I met him in first year : he was the smallest one of Slytherin. I'm so small next to him, or anyone. People mistaken me, think I'm weak but I'm not, pretty useful.
His dark eyes are trying to comfort me but I feel like nothing could.
"You know I get sick often, why do you follow me ? We could both get into trouble !" I try to say evenly. I don't want him to see me crying, but I really want to let my feelings out.
"You know you are the most beautiful girl this castle has, you know you are the smartest, you should know, so what could make you feel sick ?" I know he's trying to help me to win over my low self-esteem, but it doesn't work. "This is our last year, we should enjoy it! Don't make yourself sick for anything, or anyone!" His words are sweet, but my heart is ice cold. "You are smart, you are pretty, you will be the most successful student in centuries!" I smile, Slytherins know how to cheer you up. Nevertheless, I'm not sure it could be the truth, and I want to be left alone to cry. Severus is nicer than anyone could think, they just don't let him any chance to do so. He's been bullied by Potter during our early years, but since he's with that girl, he seems to be distracted from Severus. "Let's go back to the common room and you tell me what bothers you" he says after a long minute of silence "and the boys and I will make sure it doesn't bother you anymore". His friends wouldn't help at all, but I'm not brave enough to tell him. I like one of his best friends, he's dating Narcissa, can't see her. He is so smart, handsome, sporty, funny... Anything. I might be in love for too long, it's unhealthy now.
"No Sevs, I'm going to bed, I can deal with it alone" I say, like nothing ever happened, I'm pretty good at hiding my feelings. "A good night of sleep, and all will be good."
As if it ever could.