Chapter One

It is a quiet day in a house with a family group having breakfast together and the father begins to speak as he sees something in the newspaper.

He says "Oh look, Beth. There's a chance..." and then the wife, Beth, cuts him off and says "Jerry, I am not talking to you until you get a job."

"What is the big deal? All you care about is your father's crap."

"That's because he's my father and you're always disapproving to him."

"Look. I'm only saying that maybe..."

"Maybe what, Jerry?"

"All I'm saying is that I think it's time that your father moves out of the house"

"You already tried that, Jerry?! And you know what? I think it's time you and I got divorced!"

Their daughter Summer interrupts the conversation and asked "Mom? Dad? Can I be excused?" Beth replies with a quick answer "Probably not a bad idea, Summer!"

"Ummm... Okay?" said Summer slowly backing out of the dining room. Beth returns to the conversation with Jerry as she starts implying "See what I mean?

This is why you don't support our family!"

As Jerry pounds one the table "I do, too, support the family! I support you, Morty and Summer!"

"That's exactly the point! You left out my dad on purpose!"

"Rick is your dad! Not mine!"

"I support your dad and you don't see me threatening to kick him out!"

Jerry quickly stands up and slams the coffee on the table. "That's it! I gotta go! I'm late for work!"

As Beth facepalms, "Jerry! You don't even have a job!"

"Exactly! And you said it yourself! You're not talking to me until I find one!"

"You know what, Jerry! **** you!"

"And you know what, Beth?! You suck at cursing!"

XXX

Their son Morty hears a door slam from inside the garage. Morty starts feeling a little worried and then he turns to his Grandfather Rick who working touches on his portal gun and asks "Um, Rick? Has Mom and Dad been like this all morning?" Then, Rick replies "I don't know, you tell me. They're your parents. Not mine." Morty looks up at Rick as he was answering. "You mean you weren't listening?!"

"That's the thing about married couples, Morty. They fight on and on."

"But did you not hear? Mom just said it's time her and Dad got divorced!"

"And you want me to..." he burps midsentence "...do something about it because...?"

"Because I don't want them to divorce!"

"Well, then, there's nothing I can do about that, Morty."

"Can you at least give Mom some advice on what to do?"

"The only advice I have for her to just blow him the **** off." Morty looks around the garage while Rick is still talking "That's what she should've done in the first place."

"Um, Rick? I...I... think your word just got bleeped out."

Rick just remembered right as Morty just said something. "Oh, yeah. Apparently, we're under some Fanfiction story written by someone who wants to make this a family-friendly story." Morty looks at Rick with a shocked look and quickly replies "What?!"

"It's true, Morty. Whoever is behind all this crap has us held hostage. Which means in his Fanfiction story, we're not allowed to say any cuss words."

Morty replies while beginning to panic "I can't accept that, Rick! You gotta make this an adult story!"

Rick replies to correct Morty "Um, yeah. About that. Apparently, I can't because the writer of this story is kinda controlling us so there's nothing I can do."

"Rick! I know Fanfiction! The people that read this are gonna hate us!"

"Morty. Even if I get those viewers to tell the writer to change the rating of this story, he's not gonna do it. Besides, this story's gonna get bad reviews anyway."

"That isn't the point, Rick! We work for Adult Swim! Not PBS Kids!"

"Even Adult Swim bleeps out some of our profanity"

"So, wait. Since this story has to be friendly, does that mean I'm not allowed to masturbate?"

"Well, I'm sure you can still do that, Morty. But not in this story."

"Then, we have to find a way to change this back to adult rating, Rick! I don't want to dance around with a giant purple dinosaur!"

Rick replies "It's not that kinda family-friendly. Besides, Barney's already in rehab for molesting all the children he danced with." Morty starts to give a speech to the person writing.

"This is Morty Smith! Whoever is writing this story, YOU SUCK! You better change this ****ing story into adult rating! Or I'm gonna go ape**** on you!"

Rick takes over the speech and says "To all you guys reading this, I hope you guys enjoy this story as long as Morty and I are here. I know it doesn't look as good as you expect. I know there is a lot of Ricky and Morty fans around the world and drop some reviews on this chapter. Whether they're good or bad reviews, I don't care. As long as you know that, I, Rick Sanchez, and my grandson, Morty Smith, are all here for you. And also..."

Morty cuts him off and snaps and replies "Can we just shut the hell up and get on with this story?!"

"Uh... Right. Enjoy the story, guys. Rick out."

SAFE IN THE CLOUDS

Beth is working on her laptop and then Morty comes in to check on her and he says "Um, Mom? Are you and Dad okay?" Beth replies with a calm voice. "Yes, dear. We're fine. We just have our usual episodes." Then Morty said "Well, I noticed Dad still doesn't have a job and I also heard him say something about Grandpa Rick moving out."

"That's your father. He's always trying to get your grandpa to move out."

"But he's always been here for us. I don't want him to move."

"Morty, my favorite little boy..."

Summer then clears her throat as shes standing behind her mother and brother. "Okay, mom. I know you're pissed off at Dad. But can you not address Morty as your favorite child in front of me?" Beth replies

with a hard stare. "Summer, get the hell out of the kitchen."

"Mom, this is a living room with a dining table."

"I SAID GET OUT!"

Summer quickly leaves the area and then Beth goes back to talking to Morty and then she says "Morty, you and your grandpa go through a lot together. Even though it's not really a safe adventure. But at least Grandpa is spending quality time with my favorite child." Morty looks at his mom feeling that something is not right and said "You're being a little weird."

Beth giggles as she heard what Morty said. "Oh, Morty. You are such a sweet little boy."

"Umm... Thanks I guess."

"I want you to spend some quality mother and son time together. I care about you, Morty."

Rick comes in the living room and notices something different about Beth and realizes what it could be. "HOLY CRAP!" Rick quickly grabs his gun and shoots Beth in the head. Morty's jaw drops after what he just. "Rick, what the hell was that about?"

"That wasn't your mother, Morty." Rick explained, "Look."

Morty looks on the tables and sees the blood in rainbow color. "Is that rainbow blood?"

"Yeah. It turns out she was under some care spell."

Summer comes back and notices Beth dead and she gasps. "Oh my god! Mom!" Summers runs to her and starts crying. "Grandpa! What the hell did you do?" Rick explains to Summer.

"Your mother was under some kind of spell."

"Are you saying my mom just turned into a homosexual?" Morty asked.

"The DNA in her body was created to be a straight woman" Rick explained, "Something went into her mind and started screwing with her natural biology."

Summer asked in a harsh mood. "What the hell are you talking about?!"

"You're not making any sense, Rick!" Morty said, "I want to know why Mom is dripping blood that's the color of a rainbow. This is... This is getting a little weird."

Rick makes a big sigh and starts to get to point. "Okay, so..."

Summer rudely interrupts "Get to the point, Grandpa!"

Morty snaps "He didn't even start yet!"

Rick starts getting to point to speak and then "I have no idea."

Morty starts getting frustrated "RICK!"

"I do know something that may have caused this." said Rick. "It is said there is a group of creatures that help small children with problems."

Morty facepalms. "How is that gonna bring Mom back? She's spewing rainbow blood everywhere!"

"Let me finish, Morty." Rick continues. "These creatures are meant to help young ones with problems. Apparently your mother had a big problem with your idiot father, so these creatures came by and helped her and so she clearly got too attached and then lost herself..."

"So you just shot her in the ****ing head?!" Summer asked and then paused. "Why did my f-word just get censored?"

"You're on FanFiction, Summer." Rick answered, "Get used to it. Also, I just said that wasn't your mother." Rick takes out another gun and shoots Beth again and then she finally wakes up and then Rick says "That's your mother."

Summer gasps "Mom?" and then she runs to her and hugs her and then Beth says "What happened?"

Rick replies "You got too attached to caring and you kinda lost yourself." Morty points at both his mom and the gun in Rick's hand getting more confused. "Rick! Did you have that thing with you the whole time?!"

"Well..." he burps again, "...yeah. It's my latest invention. I mean not that you give a crap."

"I do give a crap! This whole time we were trying to figure out a way to bring her back and then you have a gun that brings back life without telling me?!"

Morty then holds his head and starts to have an outburst and then he screams.

"THAT'S ****ING IT!"

Morty starts marching towards the backdoor. "I'm going out for a walk to cool off!" Morty opens the door and walks outside.

Beth says to Morty "That's the backyard, honey."

Morty walks back in and towards the garage. "Yeah, I knew that." Morty walks in the garage to step outside.

Rick then says to Beth "So, what was heaven like?"

While Morty is in the garage, he searches around the room before he does his and then he glances at Rick's portal gun. "Hmm..." says Morty. He picks up the portal gun and then starts sees a real blaster gun and picks it up and then says to himself "Guess I'm on my own adventure now." Morty shoots out a green portal and then steps through and finds himself in a big beautiful land of nothing but the river and flowers and a lot of woodland creatures such as squirrels, rabbits, birds, and everything. "Well, at least I won't be facing anything dangerous." Morty said to himself and then he starts realizing something and then smacks himself in the head. "Oh, crap. I forgot to bring food with me." Morty sighs "Oh, what the hell. I guess I gotta do what I gotta do."

XXX

Meanwhile up in the clouds remains a kingdom called the Kingdom of Caring also known as Care-A-Lot, where remains the citizens known as the Care Bears and the Care Bear Cousins, having fun helping each other. Then a brown Care Bear with a heart on his belly named Tenderheart with a heart on his belly and a blue Care Bear with a picture of a cloud with raining hearts named Grumpy, are walking together.

"It sure is nice and peaceful at the moment. Don't you agree, Grumpy?" said Tenderheart.

Grumpy answered "I do agree."

"Care-A-Lot has been very busy helping those poor children who are sad and lonely. But we sure do enjoy it a lot, don't we?"

"We sure do. But we never helped anyone with bigger problems have we?"

Tenderheart starts thinking about the question that Grumpy just asked. "Well, nothing is too big for us to handle. But it depends on what you mean."

Then, a pink Care Bear with a picture of rainbow approaches. "Hi, Tenderheart. Hi, Grumpy."

"Hi, Cheer Bear." both Tenderheart and Grumpy replied.

"Grams Bear and I are setting up a big party for Hugs and Tugs. Would you like to help bake the cake?"

Grumpy gasped and presses his paws on his cheeks "Oh, no! I forgot it's Hugs and Tugs's birthday today! I don't even have a gift for them!"

Tenderheart puts his paws on Grumpy's shoulder "Don't worry, Grumpy. We'll find a nice birthday present for the cubs."

Cheer Bear makes a suggestion. "I don't mind baking the cake myself."

Tenderheart asks "But what would the cubs really want?"

Cheer Bear giggles and says "I know this sounds silly. But Hugs and Tugs always wanted a human friend."

Grumpy scratches his head as he hears what Cheer just said. "I'm not so sure about this."

"Grumpy's right, Cheer." Tenderheart replies as he agreed with Grumpy. "Finding the right kind of human friend can be difficult."

"Well, I'm sure you two can find them the perfect gift." Cheer Bear implied.

Then they hear the bells going off and they see that their clock tower which is what they call a Caring Meter is going off.

"Uh-oh, it looks like somebody down on Earth is looking for help." Cheer Bear said.

"Let's look down and see who it is." said Tenderheart.

Cheer Bear, Tenderheart and Grumpy walk towards the Caring Meter and then look down at the Earth and notice a young boy with brown hair, yellow shirt and blue jeans sitting near a tree all alone.

"That poor boy is all alone." Grumpy said.

"Why that's Morty!" Cheer Bear said.

"He sure looks like he needs a friend." said Tenderheart.

"Hey! Maybe Morty could make a great friend of Hugs and Tugs!" said Cheer Bear.

Tenderheart and Grumpy look at Cheer Bear and Grumpy said "You really want to bring a human boy up here!"

Cheer Bear said "Well, we don't want Hugs and Tugs to be sad, do we?

Tenderheart shrugs his shoulder. "Well, she has a point."

XXX

Meanwhile on Earth, Morty is still sitting on tree looking around and then starts hearing something in the bushes and then gets out his gun for protection and then says "Hello?" and then he slowly walks towards the bushes and points his guns towards it. He starts sweating as he fears something is gonna attack him and then out comes a little gray bunny rabbit. Then Morty sighs and lowers his weapon. "Oh, thank god. For a second there I thought I was dead." Morty said to himself. Then quickly he hears a voice behind him that said "Hi, Morty." He quickly gets startled and turns around and points at what appears to be two mysterious strange bear-like creatures. One is brown and has a heart on his belly and the other is blue and has a cloud with hearts of his belly.

"W...w...what the hell are you?" Morty asked

"It's okay. We're your friends, Morty" said the brown bear.

"Stay the hell away from me" Morty said quickly running away and the two bears start chasing him down.

"Morty! We're here to be your friend!" said the blue bear.

As Morty is still running from them he trips over a tree branch and quickly gets up and continues running from them. He then finds what looks like a cave and then he enters but ends up in a dead end and then turns around finds the two bears blocking him and then points his gun at them.

"Stay back!" Morty notices his holding the wrong gun. "Oh, crap. That's the portal gun." he puts the portal gun back and points the blaster gun at them. "Stay back! I mean it!"

"We're not gonna hurt you." said the brown bear. "We're just gonna help you."

Morty then starts shaking as he's still pointing and then he passes out. The blue bear walks towards him and holds his neck. "Is he alive, Grumpy?" said the brown bear.

"He's okay, Tenderheart." said Grumpy.

"Good. Then, he'll still make the perfect birthday present for Hugs and Tugs." said Tenderheart as him and Grumpy start dragging Morty away by his legs while he's unconscious.

XXX

Meanwhile at the Smith's house, Rick starts looking around his garage and in his drawers, cabinets. "Where in the **** are they?" said Rick. Then, Summer comes and asks "Grandpa, have you seen Morty?" "I don't know. Have you seen portal gun and my blaster gun?" Rick asked.

"Uh, no because I'm not the one who snoops around your garage at night like Morty does." Summer said which made Rick realized that Morty had taken the guns with him which causes Rick to close his eyes tight and clench his teeth. "That little son of a..."

"Morty took your portal gun."

"Yeah, don't rub it in, Summer!" Rick said "I was just getting ready to use those two guns for an experiment by trying to combine my blaster gun with the portal gun together."

"And you think that's gonna work how exactly?" Summer said raising her eyebrow crossing her arms.

"If my calculations are correct, which by the way they are all correct, I'm trying to combine the energetic power with the transportation power..."

"Um, Grandpa, there's no such thing as transportation power."

Rick turns around and faces Summer and says "Hey, Summer. You're not the..." he burps in midsentence and continues "...scientist. So keep your trap shut, all right? I'm talking!"

"Grandpa, can you just not worry about the portal gun and think about Morty right now? I mean, what if he just took your guns to go out on his own adventures?"

"What do you know about adventures, Summer?!" Rick asked defensively "You never go on any adventures with me!"

"I do, too, you liar!" Summer shouted.

"Okay! Tell me one adventure you went on with me!" Rick said.

"Okay. Then, let's start with that one time you locked me in that stupid car that killed a lot of people that caused a police squad to arrest me!" Summer shouted.

"That was not an adventure, Summer! An adventure is where you travel around undiscovered places like Dora the Explorer!"

"Oh my god! Don't you ever bring up that show again! You know I hate that show!" Summer demanded pointing her finger at Rick.

"Oh, really? I could've sworn you were wearing a Dora the Explorer T-Shirt." Rick said scratching his head.

"I was four!"

"Oh, wow. Fascinating memory you have there, Summer" Rick said sarcastically.

"Okay! You know what? Forget it! You make no sense! I'm going to the gym!"

Summer angrily leaves the room and slams the door causing an empty glass container to drop on the floor. "You're lucky there wasn't anything in that container you just broke!" Rick said and then he stays silent for a couple seconds and then said "If there was, it'd suck your brains out, Summer!" Rick then moves his eyes around and says to himself chuckling "That'd be really cool to watch actually."