No Copyright Infringement Intended

Title: If you're Bonnie, I'm Clyde

Rating: T

A moment. Our lives are made out of them. Thousands of moments in a day. Three-hundred-sixty-five days in a year, thirty-thousand days in a lifetime.

Millions of moments in a lifetime.

I had never experienced in my entire lifetime so many feelings and so conflicting at the same time. I was left completely immobile, two of the softest lips had me defenseless. I was unable to resist, and unable to stop her from making the worst mistake of her life, and saving mine.

I was for a moment suspended in time, and it was as if a thousand simulations played in my head, of all the times when I'd whispered sweet things to her, and with every whisper scratching away at the walls she'd worked so hard to build, her familiarity, and her desire to defend her territory which I had so completely invaded had until now stopped her from making anoy attempt at a real connection, instead opting for sarcastic remarks, for what better to hide feelings than dismissive laughter.

But we had no more time to laugh, our time had run out. Our story, if there was to be any, was to be concentrated in all those little moments and this one. Oh, I felt it, Shaw, the four-alarm fire.

It blazed red hot in my soul.

My eyes had closed, my eyes were deaf, the only thing to feel was your lips on mine. When your hands touched my jacket and pushed me from you forever I felt it like the crush of a subway train, just as your kiss, impossible to resist. The warmth went with you Shaw, it left my body immediately, leaving me cold and helpless, but most importantly, completely hopeless.

Is this what it feels like to be empty, Shaw? With you at my side, I had almost forgotten.

You wouldn't risk it before, you never would, but you knew this day would come.

You would never let yourself go, you would never let your feelings out, but if for one second, you got to really live before you died, wouldn't it be worth it? I guess in some part of me I understand, but for the most part it feels wrong, unnaceptable. It should be me, there, on the floor, saving you. This wasn't supposed to be part of the plan, I just can't accept it, no matter how hard I try.

Your face represented the deep struggle you had within yourself. It was so easy for you to simply die for those you loved. Your loyalty was always as strong as Bear's. Even if you never openly expressed it to anyone, you cared, you cared about us all so much, even if you didn't care about yourself at all. That made it easy, for you, there was no other choice. Kissing me, however, that's a whole different story, one that is simply not over yet.

Because when you ran accross that hall I ran after you and hit a wall, because the burn of the wire on my fingers as I grasped at it screaming in helpless anger, outrage and complete despair, they are still there. The scars I got from trying to open it with a strength I didn't know I had. But you kept me going Shaw, every bullet that grazed your shoulder or your arm was a new reason to tear at that barrier you had put between us. I screamed and I shook the wire, I couldn't feel the boys hold me back, I couldn't see Samaritan's agents, but I saw your beautiful raven hair fly as shot after shot hit you, and that was the only thing I saw. Every shot I heard was a bomb exploding in my heart, killing me over and over as I watched you fall. I felt no pain myself, only the heartwrenching suffering for your life that you never felt, and someone had to feel it, Shaw, someone had to miss you. Someone had to be there watching you and take on all of the pain because they loved you. And they say pain changes a person. I think we've all changed a great deal, especially lately. I knew it when you kissed me. It changed me too.

Now you are my purpose, my primary objective, for we are legendary.

A ticking time-bomb, that's what we are, but I know you always liked the danger. And Shaw, I just want you to remember, wherever you are, that when things became such in your life that you had to resort to such measures as lying with your mouth and your eyes, there was one thing that kept you going, and that brought you to all of us, hope, because I will find you, I will gladly die trying, but not before I taste your mouth and prove you wrong. Darling, you deserve so much more. We might be a match made in hell, but if we are the fire is the strongest, most beautifully destructive one you've ever seen. You are the sweetest sociopath.

I ask only one thing of you Shaw, trust the Machine. But most importantly, trust me.